can you forgive after you've been cheated on? or is it just going to happen again and break your heart?
2007-06-22 05:04:56 · 36 answers · asked by almost17 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Here is a good RULE OF THUMB..... remember ...1st time shame of them!!!.... and 2nd time SHAME ON U... !!!!! So if u get cheated on... don't go back to ALLOW IT TO HAPPEN again,,,,!!!!! No one needs their heart broken TWICE, BY THE SAME PERSON..... and this applies to any time u r wronged by anyone for anything.... CUT UR LOSSES....
2007-06-22 07:16:42 · answer #1 · answered by ♥ Blondie ♥ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can forgive and move on, but it doesn't happen overnight. Some people that cheat will always cheat, while others might do it once and hate themselves for it. So it depends on the circumstances here. You've got to be clear with this person, find out why they cheated. Ask them directly and honestly. Talk about your relationship and any problems that exist. If you decide that their indiscetion was a one-time thing and they show remorse, you may want to consider taking them back. But move slowly. Tell them they've got to earn your trust again, and if they are worth your effort, they will. Make it clear that you want their affair to be over, and you will not tolerate it again.
2007-06-22 05:11:40 · answer #2 · answered by Dating Diva 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends, if they have a history of cheating in other relationships then it is going to happen again. Once is a coincidence, twice is a pattern as they say. But to cheat on someone takes an anger at the other person and selfishness, and frankly I'd rather not have people that don't feel that way around me. I don't care what they say they thought about the other person's feelings and did it anyway. But there are tons of self help books out there for rebuilding trust after someone has cheated.
2007-06-22 13:17:24 · answer #3 · answered by jadeaaustin 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
depends, were you told almost straight away by the one that cheated on you? honesty counts for a lot, if they were totally honest with you immediately or a day later or something (i.e. told you cos they felt bad rather than told you cos they thought they had to cos u might find out) then i could possibly forgive it but generally, even of you forgive it some trust will have been lost and if you have no trust in a relationship you dont have anything at all. also, why were you cheated on in the first place? is it gonna happenen again for the same reason or can things be changed to overcome the original problem??
Is the rleationship what you think it is or do you deserve better??
Hope your ok hun xxx
2007-06-24 17:43:06 · answer #4 · answered by Andrea C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
U can forgive but u can never forget. But the thing about that is u have to work out dealing with it because after u find out Ur mate cheated it can leave a big void in the trust part of the relationship, and even thought u may forgive Ur mate for cheating u will always have in the back of Ur mind it will happen again, u trust them less u see them in a different light, u may even have a little bit of hate of them because it hurts.
So now what u mate needs to do if he wants it to work with u is he has to earn ur trust back, he has to do whatever it takes to make it better.
And he needs to promise deep in his soul that he will never hurt u like that again. Being cheated on is the number reason couples breakup, it can spoil a relationship to the point of never trusting again or feeling insecure.
Good Luck
2007-06-22 05:17:02 · answer #5 · answered by itspink22@sbcglobal.net 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't believe the tired old saying "once a cheater always a cheater". It's frankly just dumb.
But the fact is that you're never truly going to forget it. You're always going to be suspicious of him and see what you believe are hints of cheating even when he isn't. And yet you would have to be vigilant enough to watch for real cheating. A very thin tightrope to walk.
Unless you really think you can forgive and suppress irrational suspicions but also protect yourself I doubt that this relationship has a future.
2007-06-22 05:09:38 · answer #6 · answered by elurle 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I never ever, ever forgive a cheating man. Men don't forgive cheating woman so why should we give them a second chance. Besides, contrary to popular belief, there are so many single men out here. Why waist your time on someone who doesn't respect you and/or the relationship enough to leave before cheating.
2007-06-22 05:28:39 · answer #7 · answered by SoftSpoken 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can try 2 forgive, but I can't guarantee you that it won't come 2 mind often. I won't be able 2 trust you after that and I probably would think that you were cheating again even if you weren't and it would ruin the relationship.
2007-06-29 18:03:02 · answer #8 · answered by Annie88 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That depends on you.I have been cheated on by my ex husband. I thought that I forgave him but I never forgot.I have heard that even though it was something that nobody ever wants to happen it has brought people closer together. There is no wrong answer to that question. It is a matter of if you can let it go and not hold it over their head.If you decide to work it out you need to let it go or it wont ever work out..I hope everything goes well for you. Good luck! Mandy
2007-06-30 04:55:01 · answer #9 · answered by Mandy B 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Can you forgive? yes. Will it happen again....more than likely. Some people learn thier lesson but others continue to cheat time and time again.
2007-06-22 05:08:25 · answer #10 · answered by Karen 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋