I used to get really mad at people who go to the community hang-outs and just get drunk and hook up for one night stands... but since I haven't been able to hold down a steady relationship lately, I go to the pool and main street to meet people... and I usually end up getting drunk and hooking up with the bisexual emo guys. I'm not really happy with this lifestyle, but I don't know what else to do. Any ideas on finding a more healthy relationship?
2007-06-21 20:14:20 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Also, I'd like to add that I'm not a sex fiend or anything. I'm cool with just talking or making out some... but I am desperately terrified of being alone. I'm too dependent or something. -.-;;
2007-06-21 20:26:53 · update #1
OK, the first thing to do is keep yourself out of those situations!! If you don't like getting drunk and randomly looking up with bi emo guys, they:
1) Don't get drunk (or at least not TOO drunk! lol)
2) Stay away from those kind of situations.
Secondly, you should realise that a relationship probably isn't the most important thing. If you are just hooking up randomly, you probably aren't seeking a relationship for anything other than sex. Fear not; this is very common. Perhaps too common...
What you should do it become comfortable being SINGLE. Maybe there is something in your personal life you aren't happy with and this is causing you to have casual sex just so you don't have to deal with it. Once you sort that out, you may find it easier.
Then, once you have sorted that out, FALL IN LOVE!!! It's easy if you try!!
... yeah, I'm going to STOP singing now. *is scared*
Anyway, find someone you care about, or find someone you'd like to know better, and get to know them better!!
But, if you do end up going out with them, WAIT to have sex. I'm sure you've heard that a MILLION times before, but so many people go into relationships and have sex too early and it seriously does sour the relationship! You don't want a "healthy" relationship turning into one of your casual hookups!!
I hope this has helped. I bid thee the best in your relationships and in life!!
Love,
i_lk_me
2007-06-21 20:24:04 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
The healthy relationship begins with you. You should face up to the fact your a man and your biological drive is to have sex at your age. Your fighting a strong urge. And since we are men ..aside from the disease thingy,, there is no reason not to enjoy sex as much as you want with consenting adult partners. It gets old after a while but the basic urge is always gonna be there. Even if you get a partner it is not gonna go away and trying to live up to the Religious Right VISION of a monogamous couple is just gonna fail. BIG TIME. It is not based in reality and goes against our "nature".
As far as finding guys do what you love to do. Gym, music, knitting or whatever floats your boat and you will find like minded folks.
Relationships are WORK!! You have to compromise on lots of things. And you have to have separate lives or you get burned out on each other.
But thats LIFE!!
2007-06-29 00:40:06 · answer #2 · answered by Libertarian56 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get involved in the community, rather than the hang-outs. There should be a GLBT center in your area. Volunteer. You'd be surprised at the friends and potential partners you'll meet. And as an added bonus, you get the happy warmth of helping your fellow man.
Yes, I'm serious. lol.
It's fun and rewarding. And the people you hook up with will be incredible individuals.
Peace :D
2007-06-22 03:21:06 · answer #3 · answered by Threshin 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunalety bars are the main cuising grounds. But there are other options
Are you religious? Youc an join a gay friendly church, maybe find someone there.
There is always the online community.
You could also have a party and have your friends bring friends.
If you really want to press your luck you can try going to the clubs and looking for those who dont drink.
2007-06-27 13:18:50 · answer #4 · answered by eddie9551 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Control your drinking or stop altogether. It is the best thing to do if you want to stop making bad decsions. Having a few drinks and just having a good time is completely different from getting completly sloshed and forgetting how you even ended up that way. Alcohol is the gateway to a shitty slutty lifestyle. Find a more chilled out environment to meet people.
2007-06-22 03:28:38 · answer #5 · answered by Emily 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
this is healthy, everyone has a sexual apitate and this you way of fufilling it, granted it would be best to be in a relationship but dont feel guilty about this.
mu surgestion is just let relationship happen dont go looking or u wont find it, untill then enjoy the bi emo guys, i no i would!
2007-06-22 03:20:22 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
find an alternative to drinking and find someone with the same interest's to be flitting from one person after another is far lonelier than having no one for a while
2007-06-26 07:34:00 · answer #7 · answered by cheri h 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are lonely and developing a problem with alcohol. Recognize this firstly; then secondly work on it.
2007-06-22 04:29:26 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
stay home, watch porn and play with your willy, its safer and you wont become that person that you hate, plus too much drinking will give you a beer belly...YUCK!
2007-06-26 05:30:53 · answer #9 · answered by ziggy 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋