My boyfriend and I are turning 20 at the end of this year, and we have been in a five-year relationship, and three of those years are long distance. I see him every 3-5 month, and I am to the point where I don't know if i can miss him any more than I already do. My parents will not agree if I decide to move to his city, while his parents will support us no matter what we decide. My boyfriend insists that we wait because he believes in us.
I really want to know what the majority of the people think of this situation : if I should move to my boyfriend and attend college at the city.
thanks!
2007-06-21 17:43:48 · 14 answers · asked by BlueGirl007 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Hey sweetie - I understand you're dilemma. I was in the same situation about a couple months ago. My boyfriend lived 3 hours away, and although my parents did not like it, I did transfer schools and moved in with him. This was, ofcourse, after long conversations of what we really wanted and planning out our future. This was not some rash decision that I made. Although I moved away from my family, I made sure I had some stability around me (I had long time friends that lived in the same area).
Just make sure this is what you both really want. These decisions will affect you the rest of your life. Also remember that living together is not going to be a picnic. Ofcourse you guys have fun when you only see each other after a few months, but you're going to be seeing this person EVERY DAY. I don't regret my decision but you do have to understand it is very hard work. You have to decide if he's worth that work..
O and by the way, if your parents are good people, although they may not like your decision, they will stand by you because you're their child
Hope that helps!
2007-06-22 04:19:17 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was in that situation at age 21. If your parents won't support you if you move, you don't have supportive parents. So don't worry about them because if it's not this issue, it will be another issue later on which they won't support you. I'd say the best thing is moving farther away from your parents. But be careful. You don't want to move to a city where you don't have any friends or support besides your boyfriend and his family because you've been apart so long you may find it hard to readjust to him and you will need out side support.
2007-06-21 17:56:59 · answer #2 · answered by Ellie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You move there and will end up either shacking up or getting married. Married students stand lower chance of doing well at college (they will graduate but not good grades) as they drag each other down owing to starvation of attention.
I don't think parents should support this kind of arrangement. I know I would definitely not let my daughter go to her boyfriend's (she doesn't have one) location for college because. She needs all the open space available to grow and learn from college, not tied down to anybody.
2007-06-21 18:06:32 · answer #3 · answered by Sir Richard 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hate to burst your bubble,but if you move to his city your relationship will probably fall apart.Then you will be stuck in a strange city with no friends or family.I am 35,and have a little bit of wisdom behind me from my own mistakes.You are still very young. Stay where you are. Go to school,and focus on your goals.Once you achieve your goals you will become a much better person with many more options in life.I wish you the best.
2007-06-21 17:55:37 · answer #4 · answered by Gin 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your boyfriend insists you wait, then he's answered your question for you. In addition, while your parents are supporting you, you're obligated to honor their wishes. If the relationship's right, it will survive another year or two of long-distance dating, no matter how inconvenient this setup is.
2007-06-21 17:48:59 · answer #5 · answered by Bubbeh C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well you are at a point when you could get married and he snot yet? well living with him isn't good why because you get nothing from him if he passes on unless the parents give you something. so why do this until he proposses and maybehes not feeling same way talk to him and get it now and find out and then wait marry and then move.
2007-06-25 16:30:18 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are 20 years old. There is so much out there in life for you. You are too young to be settling down and stressing out over 1 person.
2007-06-21 17:47:35 · answer #7 · answered by mimi s 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take your folks advice and live your life alittle. You have been involved since you were 15 and barely see each other. You have no way of knowing if he even is the person you think he is, and vice versa.
2007-06-21 18:06:01 · answer #8 · answered by tjnstlouismo 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You might as well be married you two been together for five yrs. Well go with your heart on this do you still love him or do you want to move on? It sounds like he don't want to marry you hes just keeping you hanging.
2007-06-21 17:54:54 · answer #9 · answered by little lou lou 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
im only answering cuz you said please answer haha.....umm...i think that it would be ok to stay there for college and visit your family. you are over 18 and you are able to make your own decisions. just make sure that your family wont be mad at you. tell them sorry but you have to go because you miss your boyfriend a lot and never get to see him. only do this though if you are financially prepared on your own and are able to live on your own. good luck!
2007-06-21 17:49:34 · answer #10 · answered by giarc 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋