well my brother has autism with ADHD. any ways that i can cope. i am 13 and i live in canada. it is so hard to live with him. my family struggles. my mom is single and Jeremy (my brother) well, his dad died. so we are really having bad luck. Please help me. he feels so unexcepted and he and i both do not think it is fair. he is not like other autistic people, he is completely aware of his condition, but still, should he feel left out? i love him alot so pleas answer :)
2007-06-21 17:14:54 · 15 answers · asked by Falling for you... 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ People with Disabilities
He is on medication, and just this summer was in a hospital because the doctors screwed up big time.
2007-06-21 18:08:29 · update #1
My heart goes out to you. I know exactly how you feel. My little brother is also autistic, and, like your brother, he knows that has autism because he is high functioning. I've struggled many times with having autism in my home. I know how hard it can be to watch someone you love go through the pains that autism brings. And since you live so close to it, you have to experience those pains right along with your brother.
It is really hard for higher functioning children with autism, because, as you said, they know that they have autism and that what they do socially is not acceptable. They know that's why they don't have friends, but they just don't know how to behave in an appropiate manner. My brother is shunned at his school, and it hurts me so bad to have to see it happen. You are right, it isn't fair, but nothing in this world is fair. It's not fair that he is feeling left out, and that my brother feels left out, but, to be honest, there is nothing we can do about how other people choose to act. The best you can do is be a good sister to him, encourage him, be his friend. Is your brother in some sort of therapy program for people with autism? My brother is and it has worked wonders for him. They are teaching him how to behave appropiatly in this world, and he has some friends now. He is so much better since he entered that program.
I know how hard it is to see your brother get hurt like this, and how hard it is to live with autism period. But there is hope, if your brother gets into a good treatment program. I don't know if you are a Christian, but I would like to pray for you if you don't mind. Prayer can do wonders.
God Bless!
P.S. My brother also has OCD and a language-based learning disorder, but he is getting so much better since he got into therapy. If he isn't already, please try to get him into some sort of therapy for autistic people. It is amazing.
2007-06-24 05:21:18 · answer #1 · answered by musicalchik 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are a great big sister. People can be bigotted and jerks toward people with any disability. Autism is a form of mental illness and many people with the diagnosis (label) realize they are different from others.
How is he left out and by whom? You cannot make his peer accept him but you could stay one person at a time to help them realize what a wonderful person he is.
I would think in Canada, like the USA, you can get assistance both educational and medical for your brother. There are medications that reduce the ADHD behaviors and there are also medications to reduce the symptoms of autism. Ask your teacher or look up in the phone book for a mental health center. Your mother will have to take your brother but it could be beneficial to the entire family.
Realize you nor your mother caused your brother's diability nor can you change or cure his problems. You can recognize what 'sets him off' and the things that keep him calm and focused.
And in the end, should his problems be so severe that the family cannot manage, perhaps the assistance of a mental health center residential program for a short term placement could help.
2007-06-22 00:39:25 · answer #2 · answered by banananose_89117 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your post shows how caring you are. Sending prayers and good thoughts your way.
A lot of people are just jackasses when it comes to others who are different than they are. Most of the time they are just scared to be around someone who is different because they dont know how to act. They dont know if they should ask what is wrong with your brother or just try to pretend that nothing is wrong ! I bet you feel like smacking them all sometimes.
The important thing is that if you cut yourself some slack, and still be just a kid sometimes, get out with friends, have fun and dont feel guilty about it.
There is quite a bit of information on the internet that you might find helpful. Contact some of these groups and find out if there is a support group for "Siblings of Autistic Children" in your city. It will help a lot of talk to other kids going through the same thing you are. And ask about groups for your brother to participate in too -- good luck (((((hugs))))))))
2007-06-22 01:05:07 · answer #3 · answered by isotope2007 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You're attitude is great! That's the biggest single thing you need.
There are alot of organizations that can help you. This incldes supports for people (including young people) who have relatives with disabilities. Check with local disability organizations to find one in your area you can join.
The value here is that such groups help you two or three ways: a) they give you a place to talk out your feelings with others facing the same challenges; b) they provide the kind of information you need (how to cope, how to do tings with or otherwise relate to your broter) and c) oftenthey have social activities both of you can participate in.
There are also online support groups. I'm not familier with those in Canada--but you should be able tofind some by searching for "support groups relatives of persons with disabilities" and similar searches.
Good luck! :)
2007-06-22 00:24:47 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
i have worked with people who have autism for a number of years in a group homes that are just for them. i am in Canada.
anyway it sounds like your brother is what is called high functioning . it also sounds like he is hard to deal with .
i don't suggest you put him in a home as i am aware that even ones that sound and look like they are wonderful are not . that is why i quit working at the homes. very well hidden abuse of the residents.
i do suggest that your mother and both you and your brother see a behavioral specialist who works with autistic people often.
i also suggest that if your both getting to worn out looking after him you consider a day program some of the time to help take the load off of you .
at any rate your a kid and your life is suppose to be largely about you at this point . its great you help your brother but don't do it so much that you neglect yourself and your own life .
if you wish you can email me with more specific questions regarding your brother i would be very pleased to offer any help i can .
2007-06-24 20:53:38 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He should deffinately not feel left out. If he's aware if his condition like that, i don't think he has the autism badly, which is wonderful. With the ADHD, there is medicine out there that helps so much. I'm sure if he was on medicine for ADHD he'd be like a new kid. Good Luck!!
2007-06-22 00:19:31 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
Oh bless your heart! I feel for you, because you are basically having to give up your childhood early to take care of your brother. I am sure you don't mind but you also must be exhausted from having to take care of him so much. I have done some search on the web and have found a link for you to contact and hope that it helps to lessen the burden on both you and your mother. Good luck and keep up the good job of taking care of you little brother.
http://autismsocietycanada.ca/understanding_autism/screening_assessment_diagnosis/index_e.html
2007-06-22 10:01:11 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel so bad for you,Jeremy and your Mom .Jeremy shouldnt have to feel left out why dont you and him hang out 24-7 im sure he would like that but I understand you have a life to so just do it until he makes freinds hope you guys get hit with a fortunate streek
2007-06-22 01:58:03 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry to hear of your difficulties. I would try to find a family support group or something.... He definitely should not have to go through what he's going through...I totally admire you for speaking up about him...most people wouldn't care so much...I hope things work out...
http://www.healing-arts.org/children/autism-links.htm
2007-06-22 18:52:53 · answer #9 · answered by Lorraine_us 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you could get him some counseling to help with his feelings and try some different clubs for kids to go to ymca and things like that there are plenty of meds it just takes time to find the right one you are a great sister for caring good luck
2007-06-22 22:46:04 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋