OK, so I've been seperated from my husband for over a year now but we still hang out and try and try again but he is a horrible man and I can never be with him for more than a day or two at a time. Well, I know he's been dating and whatnot as he throws other girls names at me and sends me pictures of them and stuff (obscene ones too) and I was contacted yesterday by his most recent girlfriend.
She, I think, just wants some closure, needs to know certain things but its REALLy bothering me to hear her tell me the HORRIBLE things he did to her. I'm working on divorcing him and moving on with the shell of a life he has left me with and I've been talking to this woman for 2 days straight and I think its out of sympathy on my part but I really just don't want to talk about him, hear his name, etc.
He hurt her really bad, and not just emotionally and mentally and I feel sooo bad for her because from the sounds of it what he did to her was worse than he did to me. What to do?
2007-06-21 10:17:01 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
First off I commend you for your kindness.
Having said that, consider telling her you do not want to hear about him again.
Think about this: She was dating a married man and at the time you two were trying (sort of) to work it out. Need I say more?
.It's time to think of your emotional health right now in order to pick up the pieces and move on which is nearly impossible if you are listening to her regurgitate this stuff at you.
and...finally
If she is not a friend, which I suspect she's not, then say goodbye and move on. Treat yourself well and have a wonderful life. I did it, so can you!
2007-06-21 10:24:27 · answer #1 · answered by JustMe 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hi
You have your life to sort out.... your only connection to her is him... she doesn't really want him gone and is using you to keep it going in memory... yes she's hurting but you are the one trying to move on
Do yourself a favour cuut her out (nicely though) you know can't talk busy etc etc or you won't be able too move on.....
Oh and he's not left you with empty shell of a life... he's left you with a full and happy life that you haven't discovered yet
2007-06-21 10:23:06 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know you don't want to hear his name but it sounds like you might be able to help each other. You are kind of going through the same thing except for the fact that you were married to him. I really think you two can help each other.
2007-06-21 10:21:18 · answer #3 · answered by ♥ Nikkee D ♥ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Form a club. Get every woman he's ever hurt together, and between the lot of you, you should be able to come up with countless ways to make his life hell.
2007-06-21 10:31:42 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like the two of you need to file a police report and get this loser off of the streets before he literally kills someone. And you need to keep totally away from him and not even talk to him, ever.
2007-06-21 10:23:58 · answer #5 · answered by Randy C 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All of you who are victims or ex-victims of this low life scum sucker should get together and visit with the police. He deserves to spend some time behind bars making Bubba happy instead of making other people miserable for his own amusement.
2007-06-21 10:21:12 · answer #6 · answered by acmeraven 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
she's probably coming to you because she feels the same way about him that you do and she's just plain hurt. tell her how you dealt with the way he treated you and what helped you get over him. is she someone you could be friends with? if so, after you get stuff situated, maybe you could hang out as "therapy" and just not talk about him. sometimes it's comforting to know that someone else hates your ex as much as you do.
2007-06-25 08:44:23 · answer #7 · answered by raven 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its not your problem honey! Its hers. She's an adult and needs to deal with her own issues. I bet she didn't think of you once while she was sleeping with him but now that he's done her wrong she thinks of you. Thats messed up and you have to deal with your own issues with this loser. She should just be glad that she didn't marry the a$$!!! Politely tell her that you've been hurt by him yourself and you feel for her but that you just can't deal with her problems because you have your own to deal with.
2007-06-21 10:23:44 · answer #8 · answered by coley0204 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok...you need to break out of this. Both of these people are sucking the life out of you. Do not allow yourself to be used as an emotional crutch for these two....."dubious individuals".
2007-06-21 10:27:58 · answer #9 · answered by Chaz 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are sorry for you husband mistress? Tell her you would like to move on and drop you husband and the topic of talking about him from you life.
2007-06-21 10:22:53 · answer #10 · answered by jewelsthomas 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋