What can I do about a sister with boundary and respect problems?

Question

My sister doesn't really respect boundaries. She comes over late at night without calling. Then I feel I have to ask her to stay. She and her kids treat my house at times like it theirs and I feel unable to say anything. I am afraid of hurting people's feelings. She calls over and over when I don't answer the phone and calls late at night. Her kids are also not respectful a lot of time and are pushy. I have an extremely hard time setting boundaries. I love my family and want them in my life, but I don't want people just coming over whenever they want to and asking for stuff. It makes me really nervous and unhappy a great deal of the time. Also, I am afraid it is going to ruin my marriage.

Answer 1

first decide on a time when you don't want phone calls. Then turn the ringer off. Second, don't answer the door when it is after a certain time unless you want a visitor. Third tell your sister that sincer her kids don't respect your place you will gladdly meet her at the mall or mcdonalds to hang out but your place is off limits. Beyond this the only thing to do is move and not tell her where you moved too.