Would it bother you? Would you say something?

Question

Would it bother you if your boyfriend was going on sites and messaging other woman? (and i've noticed a trend of big booties and boobs lol) My boyfriend and I have been in a serious committed relationship for over a year. I recently discovered that he has been going on random sites and talking to girls. They are all from the USA (he's in canada) and his profiles all say he's in a relationship... but sometimes he gets kinda flirty. This bothers me even though I know he would never cheat on me or anything. I just want to know if it's normal to get jealous over something like this and if you would say something to your boyfriend about it?

if you would say something to him about it what would you say? How would you approach him about it?

i don't want to admit it, but i figured this out by snooping :S

Answer 1

The way you feel is normal. Yes you should talk to him. Let him know how you feel about this. If you want a good relationship, you have to communicate and be honest.

Answer 2

First off all he is disrespecting everything that you are. I would tell him he either stops doing this or the relationship is over. Stop letting this guy get away with cheating on you he is flirting with other women over the net. You do not think he isn't doing it at work anywhere else he may be when your not around?. I think you have to wake up and realize that your man is just a dog and could be a player. Just because he says he is in a relationship doesn't make it okay. You have the right to be more then jealous you have the right to throw him in the doghouse and to scream at him for awhile he deserves to be yelled at after treating you like yesterdays garbage.

God Bless and Best Wishes.

P.S. It appears to me that this guy is contemplating cheating on you or already has on past GF's maybe it is time to consider your future and him not in it?.

Answer 3

Mixed bag of emotions about this. It is basically harmless, makes him feel "popular," probably turns him on, it IS virtual, so is meaningless...but if it bothers you, face the fact that you are sharing some part of him with others. In the real world, none of us owns another, no one is 'ours' completely, and we would not want them to be. (can you imagine having to explain every thought you ever have to your BF?) If this bothers you, discuss it with him calmly, find out what kind of thrill he is getting from it (I can promise you it is ego based, no more, no less), and let him know how you feel. Do not be surprised if he is less than willing to give up the activity. He is getting the thrill of "new" which you cannot give him. You are the one who must decide what kind of lines are drawn in the sand, and if they are too far from your values, then find a new BF...but don't be surprised if you have the same problems, or more, with the new one. Don't ever be in a hurry to get rid of a guy because of small things, what you get in return may come with serious baggage. Good luck and peace.

Answer 4

Well, how did you "discover" this? If you did by snooping, then you better be prepared for him to stop trusting you, too. If you're certain that he'd never cheat on you (how could you be, by the way?) then what's the problem? If you're jealous and think it borders on betrayal, then you're going to have to just say "I snooped through your PC and caught you messaging big booty hoes (just kidding... don't say big) - what's up with that?"

No sense in skirting the issue.

Answer 5

Um....I chat with people all over the world. So does my wife. She knows who my 'friends' are and I know hers. Many a time we have sat together and chatted with others. It's all a matter of trust and honesty. I love her and only her, but as an adult, (instead of having conversations with kids for example) sometimes a good 'flirty' conversation can be a lot of fun. She's the one who gets the benefit, as do I. It's up to you two as to how you will handle this. I suggest a long, heart to heart talk with total honesty from both.

Answer 6

You absolutely have reason for concern. If in fact your boyfriend truly loved you he wouldnt want or need to chat with other women.

I would talk with him and ask why he does it and let him know it bothers you. Ask him would he allow you to view the chat when he is chatting if he acts as though it would bother him, then dump him cause he WILL cheat.

Answer 7

of course it would bother you. It kind of hurts your feelings when you see them flirt with others. It's very normal. In a sense maybe you feel a little cheated because you don't do that to him, and he does that to you. You just just simply tell him that you don't appreciate that. Because if he was satisfied with you and seriously commited to you, then he shouldn't still be seeking others.

Answer 8

It is normal to be jealous, even if you know it's harmless. I'd pick on him about it. Figure out one of the girls' screen names, then nonchalantly say something like, "So, how's Buzom Bosom doing today?"
That way he knows you know, but it's funny instead of being a topic for a fight. Maybe he'll get embarrassed and stop.

Answer 9

dudeee its the internet age. maybe he is not into video games and this is his way of getting fun. dude sounds exactly like me. i hate video games but i have a profile on yahoo personals just for the fun of seeing who will write me. mind you i have being in a 4 year relationship and am still in it. its harmless fun, let it go. but make a habit of popping in every now and then so he sees you around when he is surfing

Answer 10

I don't know... I probably wouldn't find it very acceptable. I'd talk to him and ask if it is something he's planning to be doing throughout the relationship - and I'd have to decide for myself if I was ok with it, or if I needed to look for someone else.