What do you do when you can't meet people's expectations of you?

Question

How do you cope with it? That guilty feeling, even though you know in your heart you've done everything you know is right to help.

Answer 1

Those of us who are perfectionists and people-pleasers really struggle with this. The hard thing is you will never please all of the people all of the time. If you tried your best, then the problem is not you. Let it go if you can. Keep giving yourself affirmations and try to surround yourself with people who will be uplifters and encouragers.

Answer 2

It depends on the expectations that they have.

If they are unrealistic and were wanting you to do things that you could not do, either through lack of training ot lack of experience then you should not feel bad nor guilty that you did not meet their requirements. That will not, necessarily make the guilt go away but it removed the burden from you.

If on the other hand they were realistic expectations and you did not carry them out because you messed about or went back on you word, then you are already dealing with that in those feelings of guilt. Do not beat yourself up about it too much - that is now in the past and it is the future that you have to concern yourself with. Not meeting people's realistic expectations means that they are less likely to consider you "able" the next time. If you did do wrong then admit it, justify it but do not offer whiney excuses and move on

good luck

Answer 3

We will never be able to please everybody and live up to everyone else's expectations. The most important thing you can do is to do and be the best you can. That is all anyone, including yourself, should expect. I'm sure you have goals set for yourself and working towards those goals is what you should be concentrating on. Trying to live up to other peoples expectations of you can drive you crazy and get you off track and out of focus. Stay focused on what's important to you and continue to work towards your goals. Be proud of yourself and get rid of any guilt you may be feeling. Do your best in all that you do and that makes you successful. Good luck. Don't let other peoples opinions get you off track.

Answer 4

punch them in the face , it works a treat.

but seriously, if they cant help themselves then i wont do much to help them anyways, its tough love but it works, dont get this the wrong way i will lend a mate £20 if he is skint or a bill has come through, but if they have bought a new coat for £200 and then ask to borrow £50 cos they are skint then i wont lend it them simple as that.

just be a bit tougher with them they wont like it, but its for the best of both parties

Answer 5

You cannot do anything about that. You can't control other people. Just keep on being yourself and doing the best that you can. Try to remember that you are a good person, doing your best. Those who are important will see that.

Answer 6

Don't fret about it. Just do the best you can. That's all you can do. Perfection doesn't exist. By the way, whose expectations do you think your not satisfying? If you do not know how to perform the task just say so. Don't fake it.

Answer 7

job one is; don't worry. it is important that you live your life for yourself. people sometimes tend to place high expectencies on others so that it diverts the attention away from their own short-comings. no one is 100% perfect in everything they do. just do the best you can in everything you do and that will be self rewarding enough. be confident and happy in your abilities. your best will always be good enough.

Answer 8

I get on with things. I inevitably do something in the near future that makes people think better of me again.

Answer 9

too bad for them then....they are those people who's always stress out. Just remember you can't please everyone..some people is just hard to please. Do your best and take whatever crap....lol....with an open mind and move on...surely you don't want to be burned out and get old before your time... :)

Answer 10

i set my face like flint and move on with my life