Wedding Invites are non-transferable, right?

Question

My 2 roomates and I were invited (in 1 invitation with our all our names on the envelope) to a friend's wedding.
Roomate #1 has enough money to travel to the wedding (even though she owes me money) and has already rsvp'd.
Roomate #2 and I are still trying to save enough $$ to make it. (RSVP is due in 2 weeks).
However, roomate #1 has somehow assumed that us two aren't going to make it, and has decided to bring her sister to the wedding. How can you just bring someone who wasn't invited? Isn't it sooo rude to decide she's going to take an extra seat intended for someone else?
I just feel so wronged, even if I can't make it!

Answer 1

Unless the invitation plainly stated "and guest" it is a breach of etiquette to bring a guest that was not invited to the wedding. I would point this out to your roommate-but obviously no one is the "etiquette police" and its her choice if she wants to be rude or not. However, she cannot "transfer" you or your other roommate's invitation. She choose to invite a guest, but she cannot "take your spot" so to speak. You should still RSVP if you plan to try and make it. If you find you just don't have the money, make sure to send a note to the bride at least three weeks prior stating that unfortunately you cannot attend, but thank her for thinking of you and that you hope she enjoys her day.

Answer 2

Get her a book on etiquette. You should never bring someone to a wedding that was not invited. The guests are the choice of the bride and groom. They may have been forced to leave family members or other friends out to invite you. They should have the opportunity to replace you with somone that THEY choose to attend. I would be angry with anyone that brought someone that I did not know, but had to pay for, to my wedding. You need to let them know well in advance if you are not going to attend, so that they can replace you if they choose to.

Answer 3

Your "friend" is a very tacky person and no she can't invite her sister to go with her. If I were you I'd find a new roommate. Although none of your friends appear to have manners. You do not invite 3 separate adults on one wedding invite. Only couples go on the same invite. Stop lending people money.

Answer 4

It is wrong to take someone that wasn't invited. My fiance and I were invited to a friend's wedding a few months ago, which I wasn't able to attend due to a business trip. My fiance assumed that it was OK to take his best friend instead and I pressurred him to call and ask. He kept saying why shouldn't it be OK as they were already couting on two ppl anyway? Well, just as I thought they asked him to come alone as they prefer to invite another friend who wasn't invited due to budgeting and space... so I think it is very important that only those who have been invited attend the wedding. Unless your roommate checks with them and they say it's OK.

Answer 5

did the RSVP ask how many ppl were going to attend? as far as wedding etiquette goes in order to invite someone other than who was on the invitation the envelope would have had to say i.e. "Sarah Smart and Guest"
that is so rude to give away your spots! she can't do that.
all the best on raising your money! i hope you teach your mean roommate a lesson!

Answer 6

The invitation was not written to "roommate 1 plus guest, roommate 2 plus guest," etc. It was written to the three of you. There are no "tradesies" when it comes to wedding invitations! I hope she's telling the bride that she's bringing her sister because I'm guessing the bride will tell her she can't. That's really presumptuous on her part if you ask me!

Answer 7

If this grow to be intentional it grow to be relatively cheesy to ask you to the bathe w/o inviting you to the marriage. it would tick me off too if this befell to me! Too undesirable you already despatched the present. i'd call the bride's mom to make sparkling or embarrass, in spite of the case would be: "i grow to be invited to the bathe, yet not at all won an invitation to the marriage. i'm questioning if perchance my invitation grow to be lost interior the mail." And often times, it relatively is. My dad and mom are making plans their anniversary social gathering, and each and all of the clergy at their synagogue won an invitation different than the top rabbi. He wasn't confident no count if he could say something, yet he spoke up. My dad and mom at the instant are investigating no count if there grow to be a mix up on the invites save or the positioned up place of work. a minimum of another guy or woman did no longer acquire their invitation the two.

Answer 8

This is totally not done.

I think you should sell your kidney to go!
Don't let the $$ hold you back - just go!

As to the sister: It is really not done, but it is not your business. So just go as yourself by yourself and don't tell your roommate or her sister what to do.
At most you can tell her that you (and the other one) are going, and that wedding invites are not transferable EVER.

But if someone breaks etiquette, the etiquette says that you can indicate what the proper etiquette is, but they will get the say in whether they choose to heed that advice.

Answer 9

This girl is very rude & has no manners at all. I would ask for the money she owes you since she has money to travel to an interstate wedding. Then you can go & she won't be able to.

Answer 10

Uh, yeah, they're not movie tickets.
Just do your own RSVP, and let the others do their own - and let the fallout begin, when they realize the respondent isn't on the guest list.....