How can I not hate this man??????

Question

God does not want me to hate anyone but it is soooooooooooo hard!!
For when you hate someone you are commiting murder in God's eyes but sometimes I truly just cant stand this man
I need a verse to help me not feel this way!!!
My father is an achloic and comes home eveyday drunk and screams and yells calls me a ***** and the I'm doub went through this my whole life well what I rember im 20 now I need to get ou of this house. How am I supposed to Honner thy FATHER and thy mother....I could never honnor him let alone love him I ask God all the time to help me not hate him and just forgive but ITS HARD when it happend OVER AND OVER again..... what aresome verses I can look at for hlep??

Answer 1

I will look some up for you. I have lived with the same thing my whole life.

If you need to vent, feel free to email me.

just remembr you are not alone, and the God will lead you out of this!

But now thus saith the LORD that created thee, O Jacob, and he that formed thee, O Israel, Fear not: for I have redeemed thee, I have called [thee] by thy name; thou [art] mine.

When thou passest through the waters, I [will be] with thee; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow thee: when thou walkest through the fire, thou shalt not be burned; neither shall the flame kindle upon thee.

For I [am] the LORD thy God, the Holy One of Israel, thy Saviour: I gave Egypt [for] thy ransom, Ethiopia and Seba for thee.

Since thou wast precious in my sight, thou hast been honourable, and I have loved thee: therefore will I give men for thee, and people for thy life.

Fear not: for I [am] with thee: I will bring thy seed from the east, and gather thee from the west;

I will say to the north, Give up; and to the south, Keep not back: bring my sons from far, and my daughters from the ends of the earth;

[Even] every one that is called by my name: for I have created him for my glory, I have formed him; yea, I have made him. Isaiah 43:1-7

Jeremiah 29;11-14

2Cor 12:9

Answer 2

the first thing that comes to my mind is the verse that God tells us

It rains on the just and the unjust.

Meaning that you are going through this just as any non believer would be going through this.

The test part is this. Can others tell you and how you deal with this situation apart from the unbeliever whom is going through the same thing?

Does how you handle this situation show yourself and others that you are different. That you are a child of God and not a child of the world.

God does not lead us to it, but he will always lead us through it, we need only ask.

You may be feeling that it is time to get away from the situation. It very well might be. You may also need a lot of time before you can look back and see why you went through what you have.
One day, you will look back and it will be clear why God allowed this "rain" to fall. You will be stronger, wiser and prepared to help others and yourself.

Read any book by Cory Tenbloom, now that is a lady that it rained on a lot. Once she thought that she had forgiven, God sent her tormentor back into her life, just to show her that she had not really forgiven this man. Then God in his Mercy and Grace gave her the long awaited real forgiveness for this man. Its an awe inspiring life story, and she give all the glory to God in her life, even through the rain.

Answer 3

There are scads of verses about love, and about treating others with the same compassion you would like to be treated with. I'm sure you know about these verses.
The question is, how do you fit your situation into these verses? You are in an extremely difficult situation, there is no doubt of that.
But, what made this man so bitter? What sort of things must he have suffered, that he could not reach out to his own child with love and compassion? Could his own childhood have been a nightmare, leaving him cold, and hardening his heart?
Has anyone in his lifetime ever really tried to give him the love and understanding every human heart craves? Yeah, I know there must have been something between him and your Mom, or you wouldn't be here...but, was that relationship built on lust...or love?
Having lived with verbal abuse all of your life, did you rebel with a vengeance, when you hit your teens? Did you put your parents through hell?
Or did you buckle down and concentrate in school, so you could get the grades and have a chance at a career? Or are you settling for flipping burgers at the local Mickey Dee's?
You are twenty years old now, you tell us. Quite old enough to move out and begin a life of your own. Pay your own bills and buy your own groceries, etc. You don't tell us why you are still living at home...but as long as you do live at home, you can do your part to try to help your Dad. You aren't a child any more, to cower when he begins to rant. You can answer his abuse with love. You can ignore his insults, while you make him dinner.
You can follow Jesus in this situation. Yeah, it's sooooooo hard...but is it any harder than the road He walked? Has Jesus EVER asked anything of His kids that He, Himself has not endured? Even as He was being nailed to the cross, He prayed that God would forgive His murderers.
Because He loved His enemies enough to die for them, we all have the opportunity to become sons and daughters of God!
So, Hun, straighten your backbone, square your shoulders, and tote your burden proudly.
Take up your cross, and follow Jesus...

Answer 4

OK OK now 1st off religion has nothing to do with this! I do not believe in A GOD! But I do know how to handle this from experience! First off remember your father is sick and yes he made the choice to be that way! So what you need to do is not hold a resentment towards him because you are only hurting yourself! Let it go and move out ASAP! Stay away from him and maybe some day he will get his life together and maybe he won't but you need to only worry about you right now! I do not hate anyone because I believe people like this can not help themselves and need help but you are not the one to do it!

Answer 5

Move out & be Good to Urself! That is to say, whom does Ur anger affect??? Yes, U of course!!! Get rid of it!!! In this way, U WILL Honor Ur Father as U have Removed the Potential for the Contact with His Sins & U will not be a "Party" to creating Ur Own Sins!!! Hello!!! WIN / WIN Situation here!!! When U do move out, Move INTO Gods' Wonderful World & draw Close to Him!!! I Know that there will be many responsibilities & things to consume Ur time but don't forget Ur Heavenly Father. John

Answer 6

unfortunately this is not an uncommon story I know been there only with a twist, the alcoholic was my stepfather and even in this state make my real father look good.

I am now 35 and married with children of my own and I have been blessed with a good husband and father to our children. It was not an easy road but you must first remember that you can not judge God, your heavenly father for the act of a sinful man (for we all make mistakes), I also know of some that still live in this situation too, so my heart and prayers go out to you

Answer 7

First, leave the house ASAP.
After you leave the house you can look for verses.

But in the end, it will not be verses that will do it for you. It will either come from within, or it will not come. The verses are just a crutch for the frantic. But you cannot think straight nor believe in anything while you are still under the current stress and pressures. Move as soon as you can - preferably to a different state!

Then once you are in a place that is calm and peaceful to YOU, healing can begin.

Answer 8

Don't hate him, try and understand why people are alcoholics. This is a pretty cruel world if you weaken. Maddening. And some people find relief in alcohol and drugs. Not everyone can find their relief in religion or sports or some other distraction. But you are right, get away from the abuse, nobody needs that. But continue to love him, think of how much pain he must be in to be the way he is. On the other hand, do everything you can to see that he doesn't abuse anybody. He has to be accountable for his actions.

Answer 9

Your family needs to be extracted from any proximity with your Father. You can honor someone from a distance!

This is abuse and God doesn't want your family to be treated this way.

Yes, forgive him but the immediate problem needs to be confronted.

There is no way to confront an abuser except to leave. You can't argue with a drunk either.

Your feelings are normal in this situation. I know from experience that with God's help you can love and honor someone that you personally cannot stand.

Answer 10

First things first. Get yourself to an Al-Anon meeting. You'll find that there are thousands and thousands of people who have suffered what you have suffered, and they've found a way out of the suffering.

Your father is sick, and that's not something to forgive or not forgive, it just is. But the way he acts out his illness is causing massive suffering. It CAN be dealt with. But get to Al-Anon, and then almost certainly get out of the house. You can do it. I'll be praying and meditating for you, as I'm sure many others will too. Good luck, and all blessings.

Answer 11

Nahum 1:7
The Lord is good. He protects those who trust Him in times of trouble.

Pray for your father and ask God to make a change in His life! God is their with you! Remember, as Christians, God is with us through good and bad times! NEVER FORGET THAT! God sees your troubles right now! This could just be an exam and the cross that God wants you to carry and see if you will give up! Stay faithful, your reward will be great in heaven. Remember the story of Lazarus and the rich man (Luke 16:19-31) and also the story of Job in the book of Job! When you have time, read these passages and meditate on them! God will never leave you! I will pray for you!
God bless!
Peace Maker