we recently moved in a house by my husbands grandma, and his newphew and his mom live with her. His sister will call and ask us if he can come over or he will ask if we are over there, if he can he come over. my hubby doesn't think to ask me 1st if it will be okay and tells him if his mom don't care. it's not only coming over here that bothers me. it is also that if we are going somewhere he will ask to go with us and my husband has allowed it. i told my husband that i wasn't going to move in this house because his newphew would be over everyday. he said "no he want." but its not working out like that. his newphew misbehaves sometimes and all he wants to do is get on my hubby's ps game and all i want is quite family time. i done confronted my husband about it and he seems to feel bad because his newphew doesn't know who his daddy is. am i being wrong by asking my hubby to not let him come over as much. what would you do?
2007-06-20 08:42:52 · 6 answers · asked by michelecmof4 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
What I would do isn't important. It's what you and your husband need to do that's important, and that's TALK about this and define what your boundaries are.
Your husband seems to feel that "family is family" and you don't set limits on family. You seem to feel that there need to be more limits on when your nephew comes over, and you want your husband to be the one to enforce those limits or to back you up when you enforce them.
That's the talk you need to have with your husband: how often, and under what circumstances, can family members come over? Can they just drop in anytime, or do you want to define certain times when they can-- and can't-- come over? How do you communicate any limits you place on visitation to the people involved? Who is responsible for enforcing limits?
You and your husband need to answer these questions and get on the same page with regards to family visitations. Never mind what people here on Yahoo Answers would do, it's what you need to do that matters.
2007-06-20 09:00:34 · answer #1 · answered by Karin C 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's obvious that your husband want to help by being a role model to his nephew, a commendable thing. And it's obvious that the boy wants a father figure in his life. I would try telling your husband that a few select nights in the week should be reserved for the two of you, and I would be tolerant about the rest of the week.
2007-06-20 09:06:16 · answer #2 · answered by Maria b 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have every right to want some family time. It seems to me, that your sister inlaw is using you and your hsband as free babysitters. Your husband needs to put his down and limit the boy's visits, and since the boy doesn't have a father image in his life, actually, his relationship with the boy needs to be encouraged, but not at the expense of his own family.
2007-06-20 09:08:05 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think what your trying to say is you need some alone time which is completely understanding. maybe ask ur huisband if he could limit his visits to a few times a week rather than every day. sometimes u want space and privacy and although its nothign personal its just how you feel. if he could accomodate you with that things would be much more easier.
2007-06-20 08:47:39 · answer #4 · answered by spadezgurl22 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'd be telling hubby his nephew is not coming over unless I say so and I'll meet him at the door and tell him myself. If I wanted a kid hanging around all day, I'd of had another baby.
2007-06-20 08:48:15 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
well talk to your husband again & tell him you will allow him once a week or whatever you think it good for you, if he don't listen to you, ignore him for few weeks or leave the house & him for sometime
2007-06-20 08:55:31 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋