Would you be ok with it? if it was out of love, no money or bribes involved.
2007-06-20 07:56:10 · 21 answers · asked by Strawberrieswild 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
i forgot to add that im not a mom... im a very mature 21 year old
2007-06-20 09:05:47 · update #1
Well, since I'm 21 and married to a 37 yr old I wouldn't be angry at all. I married out of love and couldn't be happier. As long as it's out of love it shouldn't be that big of a deal
2007-06-20 08:59:27 · answer #1 · answered by Melba 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think it really depends on the situation. I'm 23 and my boyfriend is 29; we got together when I was 20 and he was 26.
I think you need to meet this man, if he's intentions are good and he cares about your daughter, than it might be OK. Just make sure the relationship is progressing in the right way.
If he seems like he's only w/ your daughter b/c he can't find anyone his own age or he has some sort of negative baggage, than I would be worried.
If they are just two people in love, he's a nice and respectable guy, but the age is the only difference; than it's ok.
Ideal it would be nice to meet someone closer to their ages, but sometimes we can't help who we fall in love with.
As for the idea of she's a grown adult. I'm 23 years old and I make my own decisions, my mother still butts into all of my business. I ask her not to. She say, "I'm your mother until the day I die. I don't care if you're 50, if you are doing something wrong I'm going to tell you. You should listen to me, I'm your mother."
2007-06-20 15:37:31 · answer #2 · answered by Answer Girl 2007 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would be suspicious as to why a 33 year old man isn't dating or married to a woman closer to his own age. He might be okay, but he might have found an easy mark. (By dating her, she might be flattered and do everything he asks her to do.) there is a big difference in life experiences between their ages. A 21 year old is just starting to live her own life. He's been around the block a few times.
That said, she is an adult and you can't stop her. You could ask her to talk about him. What do they enjoy doing together? What do they have in common? What are his goals and her goals? Where does she see herself in a couple of years? Does she plan to complete college and have a career? How does she like his family and friends? These questions might get her thinking.
2007-06-20 15:09:39 · answer #3 · answered by Susan F 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, gut maternal instinct says no, I wouldn't be thrilled. But then again, I'd have to look at the relationship. How mature is she? What do they have in common? Is it truly love? How is he, as a man and a member of society?
Bottom line, at 21, you're a grown woman. Mama has no say in what you do anymore. So, as a mother, I'd accept it, and try to be supportive, while keeping my daughter's best interest at heart..
2007-06-20 15:04:54 · answer #4 · answered by Morning Glory 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
When my younger sister was 20, she was seeing a 32 year-old. My parents weren't completely happy about the situation, but there is nothing that they can do... she is an adult.
If you aren't ok with it, then you might push your daughter away. Just be there for your daughter, and be open with her.
Trust her to make good decisions, and support her when she makes a mistake.
2007-06-20 15:03:13 · answer #5 · answered by *Logan's Mommy* 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would be a little shocked at first and probably take her aside to ask her what's going on. I would express my concern that an age gap that far at that point in life could lead to some frustration. Then I would hug her and tell her I believe in her and I know she will make the decision thats best for her because she's a smart, beautiful woman, and go on like he was a normal b/f.
2007-06-20 15:03:03 · answer #6 · answered by <Sweet-Innocence> 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Well, I would be ok with it as long as he treats her with respect. I was in a similar situation when I was younger - I was 22 and he was 35. We dated off and on for about 8 months until the relationship fizzled out. But he treated me like a lady and was more stable than any of my previous boyfriends had been.
2007-06-20 15:12:27 · answer #7 · answered by Pink1967 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I might wonder about his maturity level but at 21 she is quite capable of making her own decisions. I wouldn't worry, if he isn't her One then she will figure it out soon enough. He has lived through his 20s already and she might just decide that she needs to find someone that hasn't "been there, done that"
2007-06-20 15:03:10 · answer #8 · answered by MeekMelon 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's easy for everyone to say that it's ok, until your a parent going thru this.. Unfortunately there is nothing you can do about it, she is grown and as much as you don't approve you just have to be her mom, because you don't want her out of your life over this, just be there for her and when she finds that she's made a huge mistake, be there to support her, without saying i told you so. who knows, maybe this is the one!!!
Hang in there mom!!
2007-06-20 15:06:01 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just count your blessings, my best friends who is 18 is about to marry a 34 year old. They really love each other and are flat broke but it is still a little weird to me
2007-06-20 15:26:21 · answer #10 · answered by cait5156 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋