2007-06-20 04:45:45 · 20 answers · asked by reverendrichie 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
Hello Rev. Richie - God Bless!
For 18 years 9 months and 22 days I was in a VERY Bad marraige.
I remained first because I am a Christian and did not believe in Divorce.
Second I had children and my Ex Husband had taken all of my money (millions of dollars out of MY bank - Not Joint)!
Third - he actually broke my back with an iron skillet (the second time) left me on my kitchen floor and went to work (a minimum wage job - he was fired from). One of my girlfriends from Church came over and found the front door ajar - we had planned to go to lunch - she called to get me to the hospital.
That disabled me physically (I'm in a wheelchair - also as the result of a medication that should have NEVER been put on the market - Zyprexa).
I did marry him for Love - I still love him but could not / would not go back to him - He did San Quinton Prison - California - I'm slowly writing about that!
I Prayed constantly about this to the Lord! I put ALL my faith and effort to doing what was right - According to what God would allow/want! This was/is so important to me.
I searched the Bible for any and ALL answers and found that I could write a "letter of divorcement because of adultery" and that Adulterer's would not get into Heaven. He had also KILLED (many) and would not allow me to go to Church - Family - Friends. It was bad.
I still had problems with leaving - I was scared of that and of him - then the Police came to my door - they aressted my Ex for Check Fraud - Writing checks using my name with his writing - and fraudulanting taking money out of my Account! This was in Bastrop, Texas! Then after that - another knock at my door - it was a VERY Pregnant woman with a picture of my EX (Ed) - she wanted money from ME to pay for an abortion and told me that it was His baby! The picture of Ed has his writing on the back - I love you Britney! Forever! ??? He was MY HUSBAND - but, apparently 'THAT' fact did NOT matter to Ed!
That was it! I gathered 3 bags of clothing and left for Austin, Texas! I was terrified but being guided by God Himself - I have NO DOUBT!
I got a small apartment in Austin with my money from Disability. Went for a followup doctors appointment and saw Mark! I had met him in New York with my family when I was 15!
I met Mark (Again) in Austin, Texas! I'll be honest - I Prayed for God to guide with this - We married March 17, 1997 at the First Baptist Church in Austin, Texas! It was Wonderful and FUN! I Never thought that I would marry again - I didn't want to but I am so Blessed that I did! I've married a Wonderful Christian Man who Love Jesus More that Me - which is right! It's the way I feel also!
I Love Mark, he Loves my children and they Love him. We now live on the East Coast. Ed's family tried to 'get' me in Texas! and Here where we live Now! Ed's brother is in Federal Custody with NO BAIL!
I have a Wonderful Life with a good Marraige and, I feel at peace about Everything. The Lord did guide me with all of that kept me safe!
Feel free to contact me via; E-Mail if you wish more details. I will be glad to share with you on a more private way!
Please be at Pace - Accept God's Grace!
Take Care and God Bless!
2007-06-20 07:42:23 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
Well my friend most of the people that remain in bad marriages probably do so because they believe God does not want them to get divorced and they feel that if they stick with it then God will work it all out. If kids are invovled many bad marriages keep going so you don't break up the father, mother family under the same house. Some may remain in bad marriages because of financial advantages.
2007-06-20 04:50:47 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I believe they do this for a couple of reasons...
1.) Religious reasons - some people think that by getting a divorce or by getting the marriage annulled, they are disrespecting the sacrament of marriage.
2.) Convenience - marriage is not only an emotional (or in some cases, religious) act. Marriage also has economic and social benefits that can essentially make ones life easier. Examples of this are child care and ownership of a house.
3.) Fear - some people think that a bad marriage is better than no marriage at all.
2007-06-20 04:59:19 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Bad marriages are like bad Habits. It is not just a habit, but a moral decision. Kids are involved. Two people having a heck of a time breaking a bad righteous habit, and admitting to themselves that they have wasted ____year mistake.
When the decision is made at the heat of the moment, the moment passes, and the motive to get moving has also passed ,unless one or both are highly motivated. It takes a lot of work and money, saving face, and thought to change.
People are more afraid of change then they are of a 'bad' marriage that is barely tolerable.
It is also sometimes easier to continue a 'habit' of lying to themselves.
50% of marriages fall apart anyways. I say more.
"The love of many will wax cold."
2007-06-20 09:46:16 · answer #4 · answered by Blank 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Most people are afraid of the unknown, which is why they stay where it is familiar to them because they don't have to deal with the uncertainty of change. People who are in bad relationships are probably so used to the abuse and the hurt that they've grown to know and feel confortable with it rather than move on to something new. It's sad, really, but true.
2007-06-20 04:52:42 · answer #5 · answered by Lisa J 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Because of the following:
1. Fear of being alone
2. Loss of years of investment (emotional and financial) in the relationship
3. Financial reasons
4. It may not be greener on the other side. This is as good as it gets
5. Loss of one's belief in love. It is a lot like losing your faith. If you leave the marriage, you will be alone, broke, and empty.
2007-06-20 05:28:43 · answer #6 · answered by Optimistic 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
They don't want to be alone, or they feel that they can't get out of it. They may not have anywhere to go or anyone to turn to. There are many reasons people stay in bad marriages.
2007-06-20 04:52:08 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
maybe they feel that they have a chance if they just stick it through to make the relationship better or...
maybe they are both dependent on each other even though it isn't a good dependency. or...
it could be because they are so far into the marriage that they have everything put in both of their names, so it would just be too difficult to divorce... or...
maybe they want to stick it through for the kids... or ....
maybe they don't believe in divorce.
2007-06-20 04:51:59 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Some dont want to hurt the children: A former student was beaton and raped on hder wedding nite. Her parents said it was her fault for not sastisfying her husband. she stayed four years. then feared for her life. She was from India..
2007-06-20 09:11:35 · answer #9 · answered by Grand pa 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
my friend is in a bad marriage. but her husband has her convinced that if she leaves him that she will never see her kids again and that she will be declared an unfit mother.
as much as I try I can't convince her otherwise.
unless you know the whole story you can't judge why anyone does anything
2007-06-20 04:50:30 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes its becuase of mutual children, sometimes because 2 people don't want to give up, sometimes becuase they are afraid to dissappoint their families, the reasons are endless
2007-06-20 05:31:17 · answer #11 · answered by Sirena609 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋