FREAKING OUT ABOUT MY OS TRIP - I want to Cancel!! What do I do!?

Question

Hi Guys,
I have a trip to Canada booked for 3wks time. I suffer from panic attacks which are crazily debilitating. Lately, day in, day out, I am freaking out about the trip and don't think I am ready to go. I am going by myself and staying with friends for 3weeks( i have only known them for a few months and we've had a few fights). My original decision to go was based on a guy that I had a crush on over there, but not sure anymore.
Everyone is so keen for me to go saying how it will really improve me as a person. But I just know myself, and I know that until the departure date, I will be living in a mental hell just dreading each day, not wanting to go. I lie awake at night thinking of ways I can cancel the trip and still save face (ie. break my leg or get sick). Can anyone out there please please help me and tell me what to do? I don't think I'm ready to do this on my own, and I need HELP!! Please help! I don't want to go but I dont want to look like a failure/wimp either :( HELP!

Thank you to those who have responded so far - I am already taking Xanax to try and alleviate some of the 'freaking out'. I used to suffer homesickness when I was a kid, which may have contributed to the problem. My fears of going are - that I'll get checked in and be ready to say goodbye to family and just cannot do it, that ill get on the plane and freak out and not want to go and try and get off, or that i'll get across the other side of the world and want to come home.

When I have an attack (i gravitate between constant fear of something, and a total major freak out) I become totally irrational and just do whatever it takes to get me out of it (ie. get there, freak out, and fly straight home again).

Answer 1

Well, you can just cancel of course but if you do, you will feel a failure so....just decide its not an option and you are going.
It is a trip that will be for a maximum of 21 days, I say maximum because you can always come home....
Pre empt those things you know are going to freak you out like saying goodbye at the airport to your family, well don't let them take you. Get one of your pals to drop you off.
Don't worry about the guy you had the crush on, you will like him when you see him again but its not the end of the world if you don't is it....you will only be away a maximum of 21 days....
Regarding being on your own, you are never on your own and only ever a phone call away from people. I say all of this to you as someone who has travelled extensively on my own.
Canada is a beautiful country, you will love it. The people are wonderful. You are going to be with friends, you speak the same language Etc... and the fact that you have had a few disagreements is a good thing. It means exactly that, you can disagree and get over it !! You will be fine and you will be fine from the moment your bags are handed in and you have your boarding card. As you walk onto the plane you will feel a wonderful glow come over you because you will realise that you are in control and can handle anything in life. Go and have a ball....

Answer 2

If you do decide to go, think about the things that comfort you the most and take them with you. A certain music tape, a book you love, a favorite sweater, funky sox, a stuffed animal, a Guardian Angel pin, a delicious tea, your favorite gum or candy. These are your emergency supplies. When you start feeling panic-y, get one of these out and put it on, read it, listen to it, eat it. It will comfort you. Escape to a quiet place for a few minutes to regroup. It could even be the powder-room. Strange water doing things to your system is always a good excuse for many trips to the restroom for what is actually quiet time. Research and write down some comforting affirmations before you leave. Put them on an index card and pull it out and read it. On this card too, write down the reasons you think you should go, and read it and remind yourself of those reasons when you're there and saying "Why in the name of Heavens did I come?" Is there a hobby you could pursue while there, that you could get out and do either alone or with others - take photos, collect postcards? Any collection you could add to? Or my favorite because it's cheap - go into restaurants and hotels and ask for matchbooks. It'll give you something to think about, it's fun seeing buildings, and you'll have some souvenirs for when you get home. If you plan this out and have your comfort foods and all, you'll be able to survive it. Not only that, I bet you have some real fun.

Answer 3

My fiance is an Egyptian tour leader and tells me the market where the bomb went off was trading as uaual the next day with many tourists still going so has not deterred anyone it appears. Police are taken up large scale security there. Of all the tourists related attacks in Egypt over the last 15 years, they have involved open areas so places like the Citadel and Museum should be safe. The pyramids have been standing for thousands of years, no one has attacked these areas yet. As for the road from Abu Sinbel to Aswan (I assume you are driving this part) involves a convoy of police escort and set times for all vehicles to meet. This was bought in after an attack on a tour bus many years ago the the police are onto it. Egypt is quite a safe place, people do not generally participate in crimes against individuals and my fiance assured me the streets are safe after dark as I found out, always felt safe. Being female he would never put my safety at risk if he thought there was a chance of me being in danger so go there because it is the most facinating place to visit and you will love it.

Answer 4

If you really don't want to go, don't go. First of all, the whole plan sounds like it's too much for someone who has panic attacks. You should start with shorter trips, close to home. Secondly, the airlines are pretty strict about a passenger's behavior at airports and on airplanes. If you don't think you can control yourself, it makes no sense to fly anywhere these days, or you might end up in an even more stressful situation.
I've worked with plenty of people who have panic attacks, and the best way to prevent them is to limit your plans to easy, short trips to familiar places with familiar people. Going off by yourself to visit strangers in a far-off location with no one there to help you is a bad idea. Tell the truth...tell them you just aren't ready or able to make this trip.
You might want to consider seeing a psychiatrist, who can help you with counseling as well as medical intervention. Good luck to you.

Answer 5

Well I have the same panic problems as you do. I know it's tough but I think you should do it so you can prove to yourself that you don't have to be scared all the time. Maybe it will help you in the long run with a lot of diiferent obstacles in your life. Being scared of the real world does not pay off. Trust me I go through the same things because I never took any big risks in my life if they were too scary. You can do it!!! Have fun and be safe if you end up going!!!

Answer 6

Hello

Ask yourself the million dollar question: What is the worst fear you have about going?

Do they include being a bother maybe? They could have told you to go somewhere else, meaning they DO want to see you. To feel like an odd one out? To integrate yourself is in your hands, you knew them, you will know them more and have more experiences together.

Good luck...

Answer 7

So don't go and live in ear the rest of your life.
Remember fear=stress=better chance for disease

Answer 8

it is called a psychiatric evaluation. it seems you need to calm down. xanax may help. good luck.

Answer 9

if you don't want to go then don't go, fake a leg injury.