My parents are divorced, my dad is remarried and walking me down the aisle. My mom is not remarried. When the preacher asks, "Who gives this woman...?", does my dad say "her mother, step-mother, and I? Or "I do" or WHAT? My step-mom has been in the picture for about 10 years, so she needs to be included unless my dad just says "I do" like he is giving me away.
My parents don't talk to eachother unless they have to, but they are civil when they do talk.
Any suggestions for how to word the "giving away" statement?
2007-06-19 17:33:37 · 14 answers · asked by ☼ lovethesun11 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
The standard answer is for the father to say 'I do', but that isn't the only possibility. I had my father say 'with the support of her family, she gives herself.' Others have had him say 'her mother and I do', etc.
One variation I heard was a brother of the bride who walked her up the aisle. When he was asked The Question he said in a voice that could probably be heard for three blocks 'the entire S---- clan!' I don't think anyone who was there will ever forget it, in a good way.
Unless you want something specific, though, the default answer is 'I do.'
2007-06-19 17:39:52 · answer #1 · answered by gileswench 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It is your special day and your wedding is something you will always remember and you should have everything they way you want it not how others want it...Are you close to your step-mom, do you consider her an important part of your life?? If so your dad could possibly say "Her mother's and I" or your parents were the ones that raised you and they should be able to come together on their little girl's day and so your dad could say "He mother and I" I don't think your step mom would be offended because shes only been i your life for a short while.
2007-06-19 18:02:57 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You poor thing, this can be a dilemma. those words- give away - strong words for a happy occasion, but it is traditional. When i walked my daughter down the aisle and even though I'm divorced from her mother, when it was asked to me, who gives this woman away, i turned to her mother and quite happily said "we do". As your step mother has been a part of your family for 10years, it might also be nice for your father to say "we all do". But you have to remember your mothers feelings on this. but again, it's your special day and you alone should decide this. I hope it all works out for you and your husband to be. Have a beautiful wedding day, luck and best wishes.
2016-04-01 06:40:27 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've attended a couple of weddings with similar situations.
The most recent had both parents re-married.
In each instance the response was, "Her mother and I." There was no mention of step-parents.
Your parents, even though divorced, are still your parents. If you are close to your step-mother talk to her about it. If it is going to bother her just have your dad say, "I do".
Try to not let it get too complicated.
Best wishes!
2007-06-19 17:58:04 · answer #4 · answered by tantiemeg 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
We had a similar issue in that my fiancée’s parents are separated, but not divorced. So what we have is the officiant says, "We invite you all to respond to the following question we do." He addresses this to everyone at the ceremony. Then he will ask "Who blesses this union and pledges their support to this bride and groom?" As far as involvement of the parents in the ceremony both parents are actually going to walk her down the aisle, one on each side. Perhaps all three of your parents could walk with you down the aisle? What ever you want to do. It is your day and feel good about whatever you choose to do.
2007-06-20 02:59:55 · answer #5 · answered by MinnesotaCowboy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Embarce the situation and make it a focal point instead of a headache. When the precher says "Who gives this woman" have everybody on your side of the family shout a resounding "We do!" and both mothers stand up in thier seats. At the very least it will be some comic relief to calm your nerves and you won't be showing prefrence for one mother over the other. Give a minute for any giggles to stop and then continue on with ceremony just like normal.
2007-06-19 18:12:05 · answer #6 · answered by pspoptart 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I got married last month, and didn´t know how my Dad was going to answer the question posed by the minister "Who gives this woman...?" We didn´t discuss this before the wedding, and I was so happy with his response-he´s so awesome!
My mom died 8 years ago, and my Dad is remarried to a wonderful woman.
This is how he responded, "Scott ____(this is his last name), and my wife _______(his wife´s first name)." This was perfect!
Maybe, instead of saying "her mother, stepmother, and I" have him state his name, your mom´s name, and your stepmother´s name. Usually, everyone attending the wedding knows who is who, so this way, your Dad doesn´t have to announce the relationship, but instead their names.
2007-06-19 23:33:37 · answer #7 · answered by Learning is fun! 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My father said, "her mother and I do." Of course they were married to each other at the time.
I still think that is the way to go. Your dad should say, "her mother and I do."
2007-06-19 21:09:51 · answer #8 · answered by Patti C 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your dad should say i do as it is your dad walking you down the aisle. On your wedding invites you should mention all three
2007-06-20 02:05:15 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I liked the with the support of the family statement. That includes them all.
2007-06-19 17:44:35 · answer #10 · answered by sly2heart 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋