what do you think?

Question

My husband is starting to really get back into his religion(muslim) and he was talking to me last night and informed me that he doesn't want me wearing shorts around the house anymore cause he thinks it would give our daughter the wrong idea but making her think she can wear them! I don't have a problem with her wearing them at all!I have given in on alot of things and I am starting to wonder if this is every going to end and I know this is silly as far as something like shorts but there as been lots of things: she as no middle name and it was always my dream to have my daughter have my grandma's middle name he didnt like it cause it was not an Islamic name so I gave in, Christmas and Easter I am still Christain but so she wouldn't get confused we don't celebrate it here, the school she attends is an Islamic School and they say the dress code is for the girls head to be covered I don't agree but I went along with it! So, my question is will this every end or do I just put my foot down?

Answer 1

OH sweetie your nightmare will only get worse trust me it happened to me. I too married a muslim. Im christian ( catholic) he is lebanese shiat muslim. I had to leave him finally he was to much. anyways it starts off small things here and there for me would you stop this or that until it gets umbearable and you say ENOUGH already. when we were dating he was fine with my holidays and xmas tree dancing makeup way i dress soon as we got married after the honeymoon all hell broke lose he too said he wanted to get closer to his Koran and religion and said things have to change. He too wanted me to wear the hajab over the head. Which i completely refused. no makeup. no more showing of skin no shorts no dresses no low cut tops nothing revealing. no movies with sexual content, no music for the lyrics. No more dancing as he thought it was to provocative. no more day trips and he had to be back to his prayer matt in time for his prayers which he had to do 5 times a day. No more xmas' no tree's no alochol no statues in the houses unless there heads were missing. no more colour red which i liked to wear. Food another problem could no longer go to a regular grocery store as the food wasn't blessed ( hallel) no more eating out at restaurants same problem he had there. couldn't eat any kind of pork forget bacon and eggs. not even allowed into the home nor smell it. No more going to movie theatres for any kind of movies a normal person would want to see for fear of sexual content or someone wearing something revealing. and i wasn't interested in seeing cartoons at the theatres. certain colours to wear was taboo for me and anything kliny to my body see through were all not allowed. once a month when women would have there time of the month everything was off limits no kissing hugging nothing . anyways the list i could go on and on. and if you say no they punish you in other ways and make life miserable under the same roof. So sure he'll start out slow with you until he gets everything he wants in the end. I don't wish this life on my worse enemy. So no honey this will never end. YOu either do it his way or he'll treat you like crap. I had to leave to keep my sanity.

God bless you honey you will need it. I know you will cry often and feel so depressed and want to give up. But be strong and get rid of the guy. He will only bring you down.

Answer 2

Probably would have been a better idea to discuss the difference of religion in the beginning. Too late for that now.

I guess you should have a respectful discussion with your husband concerning each of your religious beliefs. Remind him that he was willing to marry a non-muslim as you were willing to marry a muslim. Let him know that you have no issue with respecting his beliefs and teaching them to your daughter as long as he does the same for you and your beliefs. Suggest compromising. For example, you can demonstrate to your daughter different holidays from each religion. You could wear shorts that aren't very short. Allow your daughter to abide by the school's dress code but give her a choice of attire at home.

Answer 3

His insecurities are being masked in his religious ideologies.I suspect that he would like you to be subservient as is the norm in some Conservative Muslim relationships.If your not happy with this put forward a few of your own demands from a faith based point of view to see if he is respecting you or just him self.When you entered this union was this discussed and did he have any issues with your dress then?If his own faith and beliefs trumps yours what are you good for but to obey and follow him.Convert if this is what you want rebel if its against your happiness .No one should live at the mercies of another that is not a relation ship but a dictatorship.

Answer 4

well if she is attend a Islamic school it's too late to put your foot down without causing alot of problems hate to say it but you should have did that in the beginning or at least had a serious talk about it

Answer 5

it will not end because this is the muslim life they have there women covered neck and head when they go to the mask or temple i'm not muslem but they are people who have a lot of morals they do not ware shorts or when swimming they do not let the men see the women in bathing suites they are covered ,,christian is muslem and your belife is your belife of christian to your husband this is a way of life you could not even try to put your foot down it will not work ,your lucky he lets you ware the shorts

Answer 6

Ever see the movie "Not without my daughter"??

You are just going to start becoming the minority in any decisions if you and your husband do not start coming to agreements, it sounds to me like he is already ruling the roost about all the decisions.

Answer 7

you decided to go along with this long do you really think that after all this time saying something now is really going to make a change maybe but you should have did that a long time ago

Answer 8

well i m one of the muslim countries where more than 95 percent is muslim(but i m not musilim). they really do have a strong belief and its does'nt break so easily. i totally respect wut their belief is abt god or culture or their works, but it does'nt mean the non muslim ppl also have to do it.

i think ur husband is doing too much, u shud respect wut his believes are and u have doing so. ur husband is not respecting ur religion, ur beliefs...does he? NO!
as u have 2 diff religion u guys have to share and not just with 1 religion unless one of u convert to the other's religion.
wut i wanna say just respect each other's religion and culture...let ur kids grow up with both of the religions... love means to share not just one of u can have it...if he really loves u he would share his religion when it comes to ur kids and not forcing u to have it....

he seems a really strict muslim, he seems to oppressing u and cover u up all over..
GOOD LUCK!

Answer 9

this will NOT end. he is muslim and apparently has strong beliefs.