How do you let your guest know you do not want children at a wedding?

Question

I am getting married in September and the place I am getting married has limited seating. How do you let you guest know that you do not want children at the wedding. I don't want to sound rude. Thanks

Answer 1

Your invitation and reception card should be separate from each other. If you don't want children at the ceremony, then simply put in a line at the bottom that states the event is "Adults Only" ... then make sure there is something on the reception card that states "Children Welcome" if that is what you want. I'm sure your guests will also call with questions if they have any.

Answer 2

Explain to your guests that you have limited seats and that you are really sorry not to invite the children, once you explain to them, and talked to them calmly, they will understand.

I don't know if this is a good idea but maybe after the wedding or before the wedding to do a small wedding party, maybe a barbecue or something and you can invite the children.

Answer 3

I definately agree about just being truthful about there being limited seating. If there are a lot of people with children, you might consider offering a place for them to leave their kids. Perhaps there is a local Y, or Gymboree, or something along those lines. If finances are not too tight, you could offer to pay for the children to be entertained during the wedding and reception. (I would think leaving the kids/hiring a babysitter would be the biggest issue parents would have about their children not being allowed at the wedding!.)

Answer 4

On the inner envelope of the invitation write Mr and Mrs Smith. If you had wanted children you would write Mr and Mrs Smith Miss Susan Smith and Master John Smith for the children to be included. That is the proper way and anyone should know their manners to understand However few people these days know or if they do they ignore. SO I would suggest calling and saying I want to apologize to you in advance that your children are NOT invited to the wedding. I wouldnt say its due to space since people use all kinds of ways to weasel their children in like oh so and so said she wasnt going so I knew youd have extra places. Just say firmly we arent having any children so I hope you will be able to find a babysitter.( Maybe even Can I help you find one? if you feel like saying that) GOOD LUCK as this is always a sore subject but do stick with it as who wants little ones running and tripping the waiters, tasting the cake and crying on your special day?

Answer 5

Only write the people who are invited on the invitation: "Mr. and Mrs. John Smith", if you have response cards, and you're printing them include a line that says how many people will be attending, if you notice that there are more than you invited for a given couple, give them a call and say "i noticed your invitation said that four people were going, unfortunately due to limited seating, we aren't going to be having any children at the wedding"

Answer 6

You don't include the children's names on the invitation. Technically, if you were inviting the children, the inside envelope would read:

Mr. and Mrs. John Smith
Bobby, Sally and Susan

However, I don't know if people would look at just "Mr. and Mrs. John Smith" and automatically realize that Bobby, Sally and Susan are not invited as well.

It's a fine line when it comes to "rude" and wedding invitations. Some people will find it rude that their children are not invited no matter how you let them know.

The least rude, most foolproof way would probably be to have reply cards that look like this:

0 1 2 Will Attend (Please circle the appropriate number)

This way Mr. and Mrs. Smith will see that 5 is not a choice.

Best of luck to you! (and Congratulations on your wedding!)

Answer 7

Well your first line of defense is to adress the outer and inner envelopes properly. The second line of defense is to write on the reception card "Adult Reception". The third line is to start getting the word out by mouth.

I personally have a strong disliking of the suggestion of having a "kids room". I do not feel that that should be a resposibility of a bride and groom who want a childless affair. As long as the bride and groom realize and understand that some may not be able to come because of the lack of a baby sitter, then I dont think that the request of "make arrangements for your own kids if you want to attend" is at all unreasonable nor rude. I have two of my own, I would never expect if I wanted to attend ANYTHING that someone else be responsible for arranging child care in exchange for my attendance. You have enough to deal with, I can find my own babysitter.

Best of luck.

Answer 8

Do not invite them. Address the invitations, outside and inside envelopes, to only Mr. and Mrs. So and So. If they RSVP with additional people, then let them know that seating is limited and more cannot be accommodated. And expect some bitchiness about it. Stand firm.

Answer 9

Well, you either basically have to put it in your invitation, ex. Due to limited seating we are asking to not have children in attendance, etc. or you could find someone to have a nursery in case any children show up. That would work if you had an extra room, you could either pay someone a little to keep it, or ask a teenage family member.

Answer 10

You write " adult reception only". Most likely you will get one or two stupid people who willl still bring their kids, but it really limits the numbers down. Also, when you get the rsvp's back, if you see a child's name on the return card, you could have someone close to you give them a call and let them know that it is an adult reception only and there is limit seating and that is why the couple chose to do it this way. Good luck and congratulations!