Why does my heart hurt so much?

Question

I fell in love with the best fiancee in the world a year ago. Today I feel like she has changed, Im 20 and only working three days a week and she is 18 in the military. She wants me to try and work 40-50 hours a week so i can support her more and I agreed, but she is still upset. Its complicated, but it seems as if I am not good enough for her. She says things like I will never find better than her and etc. Then her and my mom got into it and ever since then I could not get a hold of here. All i know is my heart hurts right now and its sad. Is there any advice out there for troubling times. I'm usually great at advice such as these, but right now im am only speechless :'-(

God Bless everyone for their answers

-J

Answer 1

whoever said i think your gonna die needs to burn in hell.

jesus christ.

anyway, wow. pain like that can really destroy a person. I think your fiancee might be trying to get a point across. perhaps she's getting scared that you wont be able to support her, and she loves you but needs stability. thats what i would do. i would suggest talking to her. ask her what is is she really wants from you in the relationship. If its reasonable, do it. if its not, make a comprimise. there is no anidote for heartbreak except time, so try to pull through this tough time. whatever doesnt kill you makes you stronger, so if you pull through this your relationship will be stronger than ever.

good luck, i know it hurts.

Answer 2

You're not giving that much info but a few red flags pop up with what you're saying...

1. Why are you only working 3 days a week? You're an adult now, don't you need to support yourself? This makes me think that she's perhaps doubting your ability to support the both of you. You probably have that ability but are you just coasting? You need to truly get in gear. Women who are thinking about marriage want to know that the other person will carry his weight.

2. If she is telling you that you will never find better than her, then it sounds like she doesn't think you are good enough for her. This is not a situation to make permanant with marriage. I'm not saying that you are or that you are not good enough but it "sounds" like in her mind, she doesn't think so. If you're getting married, get married to someone who is happy to be marrying you. You deserve that.

If she's turned it loose, which it sounds like she has.. move on. She may not be the one for you. Good luck and hang in there.

Answer 3

I've been there. What is happening right now is that she feel completly in security. She knows that you're crazy in love for her and you don't have the guts to leave her. She's saying things to make you feel guilty. If she is in the military you'll have to show her you're a tough guy. You need to show her that if she leaves you it will not be the end of the world and you can get another woman and live your life.What do you need to do is date another girl, a hot one, a slut one if possible. If you used to talk to her often start reducing your calls. She need to feel you stand for what you believe in. So if you did your best for her and she still wants more then let go. Let her find Bill Gates. Remind yourself you don't have the best Fiancee in the world you have one of the best. If things can't work out with her it will with another one. Hope this will help. I wish you good luck

Answer 4

I know how you feel. One day "he" seemed to change- his love for me changed from "what can I do for you" to "you are not doing enough for me" Then... everything fell apart. I did, he did, completely. I wanted to die.

But-
God has a plan. Want God's will more than anything and seek it. This maybe just a bump in the road, a hiccup- or maybe it is clarification on God's will. Let God work, He is Author and Perfector, trust Him.
Look up this article, it helped me get through alot (and I mean alot)
www.crosswalk.com/spirituallife/11538982 It may be in the archives but it's called- What can you do when you wonder "Why?"
Please- look it up!
God bless and pray hard!

Answer 5

relationships are never easy , and it sounds like she has issues she needs to deal with. Being younger and in a serious relationship can scare some people, maybe she just needs to figure out things on her own. the WORST thing you can do is clamp onto her and make her feel trapped. Just let her figure it out, and when she says things like you can never find better, she's probably scared becuz she knows you CAN find better. But don't let her talk down to you like that. Everyone deserves to be happy, remember that, if your not happy, regardless of whether or not you love her, move on and be happy. Trust me just becuz you love someone doesn't mean you should be with them. Just chill, go about your day to day life and give her some space. Feel better

Answer 6

You have to remember military life can either make a person or break a person. Seems like she feels she'll have to support you, that's why she wants you to work normal hours. Sounds like she's a bit selfish and cocky. How can she be certain you can't find better than her? I can assure you, you can. Now she has disappeared and what do you intend to do, be unhappy and wait on her to reappear into your life? The choice is yours but think carefully, can you see yourself spending the rest of your life feeling the way you do now?

Answer 7

Hold on if you can....and when it gets to be too much, let her go. It might hurt when you do, but you will heal...take a step back and review your relationship. Look at it without the memories, if you can. If she's stopped really appreciating you, then just....back up and let her go.

I'm sorry that I can't give a better answer, but good luck and God bless. :)

Answer 8

First off bro you are way to young to be getting married. To me it sounds like you are getting played. I mean bro you are supporting this girl, like what bills rent cars? Dude break it off enjoy your youth go out meet other women. Long distance relationships never work, I was in the military and tried that crap. Move on young man, man up, take control of your life and go have fun. Good luck.

Answer 9

You are only 20???? Oh my god, you have so much more life to live! Why ruin it at such a young age! Go to college, learn to shotgun bear faster, find some dirty little sorostitutes (get 'em while they're skinny) and LIVE!

Answer 10

Im sorry. You probably feel so loney right now. When you get hold of her tell her how you feel and that you're doing the best you can do to make her happy and that you will do anything it takes to make her happy.Dont worry you'll get through this. Good luck!!:)