What can i do to be wanted by my Father?

Question

My Mother and Father are separated and I live with my Mom, I only see my Dad on Christmas and Thanksgiving. He only calls me during those times and the rest of the year I do not hear from him. My b-day is right after Thanksgiving so he doesn’t even bother to call then. I didn’t go to his house for Christmas last year and I think he still has my present; he never did bring it up. He refuses to pay child support so every month we get a check (forced from him by the court system) for $100 plus we get his yearly tax return. I called him a few day ago to see how he was and let him know that I used the tax return money to pay for my class trip to New York, and buy my school Jacket, I also told him how my grades were (all A's all year 4.0 and #1 out of 582 in my class) and he didn’t have any response to this.

I also let him know that nest year I was going to be taking (H)~honors~ Chemistry, (H) algebra 2, (H) English 2, (AP)~advanced placement~ world history, and Spanish 2 next year as a sophomore and still no reaction. I am not sure what else I can do to make him proud of me and want to come visit me. He does sometimes ask me to come down or ask when I am going to come see him but I always reply the same way… when are you going to come see me? I don’t like going to his house because he is married and I have told him this many times but he still asks when I am going to come up. What can I do to make him understand that I don’t want to go up there and that I want him to call more and that I want him to come and visit me instead of me seeing him, and also how can I get him to say “That’s a great job, keep up the good work in school!”?

im 15 and will be 16 in November

And do you believe i should wish him a happy Fathers day?

Answer 1

Honey congrats on you accomplishments in school , but really you are tyring to hard to win you fathers approval, and even though you come from a broken home , you have the strength to get good grades, and make something of yourself
and just like my father , I tried so hard to also be wanted but I just got disappointed by my own father, and well now I tell my father whats on my mind sometimes it is not pretty, but he knows he did wrong ,, and you just have to just let that go for a while and just worry about yourself and your mom, your dad will come around , and realize his mistakes ,,,,,,

Answer 2

Here are a few Father’s Day present recommendations: a million. Swiss Army Compass Watch With Leather Band two. Kenmore 632 sq. in. Cooking Area Gas Grill three. Craftsman 26 hp fifty four in. Deck Yard Tractor

Answer 3

You can't make him say anything you can't make him care. Basicly the same thing with my dad no matter how much I try it never seems to be enough! Yes It makes me sad but I have to let It go! Life is to short to not be happy! If what makes you happy Is your dad being more of a part of your life than try and fix that!! Try asking him to get together with you once a month for dinner or a movie so you and him could hangout and talk. That's just an idea for you I can't tell you how to live your life nobody can you decide how to live your life!

-Hope this helps some what-
Tessa

Answer 4

Honey, I am sorry to say this, but it does not sound like your father wants you in his life. You can only extend yourself so much in any relationship, and if your not getting anything in return then you have take a long look at that and ask yourself why. I suggest you write him a long letter and tell him exactly how you feel, and then wait and see what happens. Congrats on your grades, keep up the good work. And remember, a persons actions always speak louder than there words.

Answer 5

It's not fair, but if you want to be part of your father's life, it will have to be on his terms. It's up to you to decide whether this is worth the trouble.
If he wants you to come to his house, you can go there; and if you are really nice to his wife, she may encourage him to have more contact. Of course it is not fair for you to have to do this, and I'd say you are not obligated to, but still it may be worthy the trouble.
But your father will probably never be a really great father. He's more concerned about his own comfort than with your well-being.
You have to realize your mom didn't choose very well when she chose him to make a baby with. That's not your fault, and maybe she's learned from the mistake. You need to take care of yourself (it sounds like you are doing this, at least you're doing well in school). Be grateful for the good things you have, and find good people to be in your life. Good luck.

Answer 6

Hun i don't have a good answer! He either loves you and wants you or he doesn't and someday will regret it! I wish i was your dad cause my daughter has turned on me and doesn't want me around but once or twice every other month sorry Hun be strong and love you mom well! god bless!