My boyfriend and I have been dating for a little over a month. He is hot. No questions asked. But all these girls (younger mostly) are in LOVE with him...they won't leave him alone. He tries to ignore them. But they text him, email, myspace, call, anything and everything to get his attention. He reassures me that they mean nothing to him. But a year or so ago I know for fact that he tried dating more than one girl at the same time, but it blew up in his face. I am just worried. Last night was bad for this, this one girl called him literally every 15 seconds after he hung up with her ( we counted).Is it stupid that I am jealous? How should I deal with this?
2007-06-17 04:12:01 · 13 answers · asked by spinningthroughlife 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You guys are young it sounds like. Adults don't act this way. Sooooo since everyone's learning, you will probably have a tough time of it.
I would say, preventing messages on myspace and email are harder, unless it's the same few girls. For the rest of the repeat contacters, you need him to put his foot down if he wants to be in a relationship with you. He needs to tell them that he is in a relationship and that it's ok for them to call or txt every once in a while just to stay friends (if they're close friends), but this every day/every 15 seconds thing isn't working. If they're girls he's just flirted with, he needs to tell him that he's not on the market and that maybe that will change someday but until then, can they stop harrassing him? If it's really THAT bad (I don't know), you could ask him to change his phone number. That'll cut down on the number of girls who have it.
One tinsy little problem though is that everyone seems to have his number. That might be a bad sign, but not for sure. I don't know what your group is like. At any rate, he may have learned his lesson with the dual-dating thing, but if he's hot... he'll probably keep pushing his luck. Just make it clear to him that that's not how you work and that if he wants to be dating multiple people at once, you aren't going to be one of them. And keep your eyes open if you suspect something.
I wouldn't say it's a good time to drop your guard and pretend everything's totally ok, but at the same time I can't tell you that there's definitely a problem and you should drop him right now. Unfortunately, this is another thing that happens a lot as you get older. All you can do, and all you should do, is accept what he says at face value, but keep your eyes and ears open. If you treat him with suspicion you'll damage your relationship and basically make it fail, but if you're too trusting, you could end up being the fool. So just be careful and make sure you express what you need from him, and make sure he tells those girls to back off. That much, at least, he needs to do, and he needs to make it clear. If he says they don't listen, make sure that he's also not returning any of their calls or txts or emails. That'll get the point across just fine.
2007-06-17 04:15:15 · answer #1 · answered by some girl 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
In all honesty its a jealousy thing. I completely understand, my boyfriend has had 7 partners (which I know is probably a a good thing for a guy??? lol) and he was my first and even though we've been together for 11 years now, when I think about how many partners he's had it drives me mad, so I just don't think about it. At the end of the day, if you love her you have to forget about - no point wrecking a good thing right? By the way, its great to see guys can be 'old fashioned' as well!
2016-05-17 22:23:26 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think that jealousy is what I would use as an emotion to inject into this relationship. Irritation--not from jealousy, from the simple fact that he isn't focused 100% on you. Because he is playing the game and allowing these people to continue to harass. I would think that if you were important enough he would have put the nix on this already. If there is a comittment going on here between the two of you, then he should show some respect. If there is not a committment, then two can play that game, and have some of your guy friends purposefully call you repeatedly to show him what it feels like. It is not cool. He needs to check himself and realize that it is rude, and shallow. Jealousy doesn't really have a role here---it is an ugly emotion, however rampid it may run. I would be more concerned that there is no respect for you, and that he continues to carry on like this!!!
2007-06-17 04:22:06 · answer #3 · answered by Austins Mom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it's natural after last year what happened that you would be worried but you have to trust him, girls will be girls if they see a hot guy they want to do whatever to get his attention and to talk to him they just want a piece of his time and it's not bad for him to be friends with them but if you suspect anything more than friendship and have proof of it let him go but you can tell him that its not bad to be friends with them and yes it is stupid if they're younger than him you have to believe him only him and God kow what he's feeling.
Brianna
2007-06-17 04:17:10 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you've only been dating for a month and he has girls all over the place... tell you anything? you should not get your hopes up about this one and look at all the other girls in his life as a warning sign... there is nothing he can do? there is everything that he can do to change the situation, he obviously doesn't want to...
2007-06-17 04:21:35 · answer #5 · answered by I Heart 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
girl it is very stupid! this will make him do what u don't want to do meaning to date other girls! but in stead if u trust him and leave him a little of space u will see he will come to u don't be anoying and jealous all the time cause or he will dump u or he will date another one
2007-06-17 04:18:52 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not stupid to be jealous because your heart knows that if he was serious about you, he'd change his cell phone number so they couldn't call him, he'd block them on email so he couldn't get anymore emails from them, and he'd put them on ignore on myspace. But he doesn't...because he likes the attention.
2007-06-17 04:15:55 · answer #7 · answered by janicajayne 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no it isnt stupid to be a little jealous all these girls r all over your man, u should really talk to ur man about these girls on a very serious level, all these girls r getting in the way of your relationship.....do what is right.....follow ur heart
2007-06-17 04:19:07 · answer #8 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok well until he starts acting funny i wouldnt worry about it. he chose u to be with and if i were u i would feel good. thats ur man. but keep an eye. like i said wait til there is somethin to be jealous about.
2007-06-17 04:17:29 · answer #9 · answered by becca 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell them in there face to back off your man
and too stop being some sort off slutty whores
and also tell them to get a life
its normal to get kinda jealous...i mean im still not dating a guy but we call each other a.most every day
and i asked hi what his aim thing stand for: and he said it use to stand for him and his x-girl and the day they went out
and i felt kinda awkward and...yeah
2007-06-17 04:16:47 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋