If you were dating a guy and found out he had been with A LOT of girls before you would you have a problem with that even if you loved him?
I am seeing this girl and she is Mormon and I am worried if she finds out how many girls I have been with she will freak.. it's A LOT. Should I tell her or not? I am worried if I don't it could come back to haunt me later.. like be even more painful if she found out later.. I am afraid I might slip and say something( I worked in the adult entertainment industry -- stripping and escorting and and did webvideos). She doesn't know about any of it.. she thinks I just modeled. What should I do?
2007-06-16 20:40:12 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
i was in this situation when i first started dating my bf. we started off right telling each other everything... i have only been with a few people and well when he was in high school he was in a really popular band and was pretty much a wild child. he finally told after a few weeks of dating that he had been with a lot of people and he told me why and i understood. i would recommend you telling her the truth but explaining to her perhaps why you did it? if you care a lot about this girl tell her she's different. my bf changed from the person he was in high school, everyone changes so always remember your past is exactly that..just your PAST. if she feels strongly about you she will understand although those things are a little hard to take at first. good luck!
2007-06-16 21:33:20 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be honest - within reason. You dont need to tell her the exact number of girls you have been with. But you should tell her about the stripping and videos. If it wasnt a big deal to you then it shouldnt be to her. If it is a big deal for her you probably shouldnt get together.
No point in lying now. Let her know what you are and see if she can deal with it, if she cant then she cant and never will. It would be a lot worse for her if you lie and she finds out - that will make her feel awful. Give her the choice if she wants to be with you, dont pretend to be someone else
Anyway, you can play it that your modelling included some nude acting and stripping. Maybe leave out the escorting bit until you know how she reacts to the first part! But be honest
2007-06-16 21:08:31 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
OMG! A stripper and web videos!? My gosh! If I found out I was dating a guy with a reputation like that I would leave straight away! I think any girl with class and who respects herself would not date a guy with a background like that. I guess its better you say nothing, however I'm sure the truth will come out eventually, so its you choice whether to tell her now or later. Besides you wouldn’t want to cheat her this way, I think she deserves to know who she is dating. How would you feel if you found out later the girls you were dating was a prostitute, scary eh.
Oh, and If the guy I was dating had a lot of gf in the past I wouldn’t trust him entirely, who could be a player.
2007-06-16 20:52:58 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I would date him, but would not be interested in a long term relationship. Maybe if we were really good together, then I might work on it. I've just broken up with my current bf, he's been with way too many women while I've only been with 2 men (he is my second, my first was my ex husband). You should start slowly opening up to her. It will certainly haunt you, because it did haunt my ex bf. It hurt me really badly when I found out that all of those mutual female friends had actually been with him. But remember, slowly. If she didn't accept it, then it is time to be single again.
You're an adult, use your own discretion.
2007-06-16 21:01:46 · answer #4 · answered by like-it 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you really care about her, tell her the truth. It's going to come out sooner or later and the longer you wait, the worse the outcome will be. If you tell her now, she may still stay with you. Though I've got to be honest dude, I don't think I'd date a guy who'd been in the adult entertainment industry.
2007-06-16 20:43:32 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
no i wouldn't , only because i've made that mistake before , i loved my ex husband of 5 years then found out he had been with a lot of girls before me , and he turned out to be one of the most sleaziest perverts on earth , and cheated while we were together .
it does depend on what you mean by a lot though , if you mean 50 + girls then i'd say no i wouldn't date someone like that
2007-06-16 20:47:25 · answer #6 · answered by Me 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For most girls it is the opposite. It's like a plumber, if lots of your neighbors have used him, then he must be OK, right?
Too bad you were a gay prostitute. That's going to turn any mormon girl off.
2007-06-16 20:42:30 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should model for me. You need to tell her the truth, it is better to lose her because you were honest than to lose her if she finds out from someone else, then you would have lost her because you were deceptive.
2007-06-16 20:46:45 · answer #8 · answered by Firebird 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe she should see some of your preformances. if you have real talent she may be proud of you. on second thought, dump the mormon and find someone more into who you are and can handle who you,ve been (and been with)
2007-06-16 20:50:23 · answer #9 · answered by Candii JoJo is a groovy chick. 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't tell her anything! Some things are better left unsaid; if its not going to help the relationship, why even bother?
2007-06-16 20:44:30 · answer #10 · answered by yayaquack 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋