I was at the zoo with my young 10 year-old son when a group of 13 year-olds started heckling him and calling him names like "*******" and "gay boy". I believe they go to school with him. My son ignored them but I was getting quite upset. One of the 13 year-old boys approached my son when my back was turned and kept harrassing him, teasing him and taunting him. My son just said "Leave me alone, please". But he looked hurt. I finally turned to the 13 year-old and screamed "Leave my son alone you asshole!" And punched him square in the jaw. I have very strong muscles, and was also quite mad. The 13 yo fell to the ground, hit his head and blood began pouring out. He cried out in pain, and apparently HIS parents were with him and his cruel friends. Now the parents want to take me to court for hitting their harrassing son! Please, look at it from MY view before you all judge me. Im sorry but those kids had no right to do that to my son. Was I right, and How do I defend myself in court?
2007-06-16
12:02:40
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19 answers
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asked by
Gail R
1
in
Pregnancy & Parenting
➔ Parenting
Rachel You're obviously NOT A MOTHER! Verbal harrassment can be just as bad, even WORSE, then physical abuse. My son will have to grow up with those painful memories of being harrassed. Im sorry, But I had every right to protect my son from them. They were wrong to do that, and you obviously have no idea what its like to be a parent facing that trauma every day. Im reporting You for abusing me on this board today, you *****!
2007-06-16
12:14:43 ·
update #1
And Im probably also getting this treatment because Im a woman! IF a father had protected his son from harrassing teenagers, he wouldnt be getting these replies. I thought this was America- where you stand up for yourself, and if someone picks on you, you strike back! Its ridiculous! If we say nothing when someone is picking on us, we're called cowards. Yet if we DO something, we're called outcasts. You all are sick!
2007-06-16
12:16:49 ·
update #2
GO READ HER OTHER POSTS BEFORE YOU DECIDE , lady i think that your off your rocker!!! You seem very good at getting in to fights or arguments. You were completely in the wrong for hitting that child. If you don't like what people have to say then leave but don't hit them!!!
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as for you lady come on it doesn't matter if you are male or female you don't hit ANYONE let alone a child and then you don't get mad at people for expressing there opinions!!!
2007-06-16 12:12:32
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answer #1
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answered by kitty81301 4
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You know, its kinda a maternal instinct to protect your child. Even if it means protecting the emotions of your child and how he's treated. You didn't want your son's feelings hurt, especially when you are at the zoo and trying to have a good time! I can definitely understand that. Plus you thought they went to school with your son and you don't want your son thinking its OKAY for these boys to make fun of him like this. So you decked the little fu*ker. Kudos!
Now think of it on the other parent's viewpoint. Maybe they didnt see their child harassing yours. All they saw was their kid on the ground bleeding and YOU did it. And nowadays its wrong and immoral for an 18+ person (or even a parent) to strike a kid. Look through the eyes of the other parents. Would your son have deserved to be punched by an adult to that extreme just for some name calling? Wouldn't you press charges against some woman who did that to YOUR son?
You probably went too far as in PUNCHING the kid, instead you should have slapped him, or yelled at him and told his parents what he was doing. But I understand the "heat of the moment" thing. It just seemed like the right thing to do at the time.
Personally I think you were right in reacting to them, but you were wrong in your presentation. Next time don't lay a hand on the kid, just bring it to the parents attention or find a guard thats on duty and report them. Maybe the kids will get kicked out and that will ultimately get their parents involved.
I really hope you don't have to go to jail or anything over this. Maybe you can apologize to the kid and his parents and let them know that their son needs to be taught manners, and perhaps this incident won't happen again with another angry parent. Just be sincere and try to cry a lot lol BE PITIFUL! Tell them stories about how your son is emotionally distraut because of bullies at school or something.
The bottom line is.. your child deserves the same treatment as their child. So basically you're in the wrong here. If they take you to court don't deny anything, just explain how sorry you are and you went too far. Maybe you'll just have to do some community service and take some classes. That's the best you can hope for at this point.
If it's possible, call the parents or write them a sincere letter saying youre sorry and try to settle this out of court. Maybe the parents will back down a bit and you can make amends without getting the courts involved. But if they're money-grubbing people Im sure you don't have a chance of that happening.
GOOD LUCK!!!
2007-06-16 23:37:53
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answer #2
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answered by Starlight*Angel 5
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I would sue your @ss too, and would press some charges against you!!! your behavior was soo violent even though those horrible kids were harassing your son, but that doesn't give you the right to HIT OR PUSH nobody!!. Don't get me wrong, I am the mother of 4 kids (16,12,7 and 17 months old) my 12 year old has Muscular Dystrophy and he is in a wheelchair, some kids love him and some other ignorant kids make fun of him, I defend my kids with my claws and get really pissed if someone hurts them in any way mentally and physically, but I would never ever hit or push another kid. That is abuse, no matter what! What I do when someone hurts them is just tell my kids to ignore them and move as far away from those kids. You should have avoided any act of violence...but you chose to make a bigger mess and showed your own son that it is ok to resolve matter with violence, how sad is that!!?, you could have taken the opportunity on telling your son at loud in front of those kids how sad must be to have children so ignorant and hurtful like them, and tell those kids to back off or else you would call the cops on them, that would've scared them off!!
2007-06-16 12:34:06
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answer #3
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answered by fun 6
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Ok, I do see your point of view. Yes it was wrong for those children to be doing those things. It was also wrong for you to hit a child. I do believe, no matter where you are, it is illegal to hit a child. Next time, try talking to the parents. Try talking to the child and tell them why it is wrong.
I have similar things happen with my son. We have told him to ask them to stop teasing him, pushing, etc. If not, he can hit them. Well one day he flattened a child twice his size because the kid would not leave him alone. Kids tease. And if their parents allow it, well its the fault of the parents. What do you think your son was thinking when he saw you hit the kid? Its never ok for an adult to hit a kid. Especially out of anger. As for defending yourself in court, I have not a clue.
Kids tease one another all the time. And they look for the "weaker ones" They do it because, 1 it was the way they were raised, 2 to make them look "big" in front of their friends. Please, just think twice before attacking another child, otherwise, hate to say it, you may lose your own. I am not being mean, its just the way the law works sometimes.
2007-06-16 13:30:24
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answer #4
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answered by cupidangelgirl2002 2
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I know it's hard to see something like that happen to your child. And every instinct in you says to defend them no matter what the cost. However, if you can't control yourself, how do you expect those kids (and they were kids) to do it? It is NEVER ok to punch a kid no matter what the circumstances. The mature thing would have been to go up to the parents and have a few words. But your not doing your son any favors by teaching him to respond with violence. I'm not judging you. Again, it's VERY difficult to watch that happen to your child. But you are going to have to face the consequences of your actions. And being sued is the consequence to this action. Sorry.
2007-06-16 15:29:23
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answer #5
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answered by Rene 4
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I'm sorry you and your son had to experience this, but I'm afraid you can't go around punching children as much as you may feel they deserve it. If everyone took the law into their own hands, then we would live in chaos and anarchy where strength ruled.
The thirteen year olds were clearly in the wrong when they were verbally abusing your son, and their parents were in the wrong when they condoned it...however when you turned around and chose to deal with it by inflicting physical violence on a younger and weaker member of society, you committed a crime. You should have dealt with it within the boundaries of the legal system, because now the nasty little shytes who abused your son are not only getting away with it, but they are causing you added grief and a possible police record.
Years ago those children could have rightfully been disciplined by any adult who observed their bad behaviour, but unfortunately these days not only do some parents not bother to discipline their own children, they don't allow ANYONE to discipline them.
I'm sorry this happened to you and your son. If it ever happens again, get the book thrown at THEM rather than retaliating in a way which allows them to get the book thrown at you.
2007-06-16 12:19:19
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answer #6
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answered by KooriGirl 5
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Well, I know you were mad, and it's horrible the way they were treating your son. I'm not personally saying you were wrong, but I'm afraid it's going to be almost impossible for you to be able to prove your case in court. If you can, plea out and make sure you sound contrite to the judge. Offer to take anger management classes, I'm not saying you need them, but a judge probably will. If you show no remorse then the judge will give you a stricter sentence. You could also consider taking the kids to court for harassment, they are older, already teens, and what they were doing to your kid is harassment. I wish you the best of luck.
2007-06-16 12:10:01
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answer #7
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answered by nimo22 6
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You had NO right to punch that boy!
I know it is hard to see your son hurt, but you cant use excessive force like that. They were not posing a physical threat to your son, yet you took it to the physical level.
Kids are rude sometimes. You cant just punch them all in the face. What kind of message is that sending to your son and the other kids? That its ok to lose your cool and hit somebody? You should ONLY hit someone else in SELF DEFENSE, and not in reaction to verbal harassment.
That was completely wrong, there was no excuse. You should teach your son that there will always be times in life that are hard, and people arent always nice, but he has to be strong in those situations and not just resort to violence.
I would sue you too!
* I AM a mother, and I would never teach my child to do something as awful as attack someone half their age. You are an ADULT, and you hit a CHILD. Do you want your 10 year old to go around hitting 2 year olds? Why dont you teach him to problem solve? Why not teach him to overcome his difficulties, rather than just create a bigger problem? As much as we all want to protect our children, you cannot protect your son from every bratty kid in the world. You simply have to teach him to be strong. Based on your previous questions, you clearly have anger issues, and have NO idea how to be a reasonable human being.
*Yeah right. Grown men do NOT go about punching little boys without getting in trouble! What planet do you live on?
Havent you ever heard of "excessive force"?
If someone was punching you, and you took out a gun and shot them, that would be excessive force and not self defense. You have to protect yourself in a manner equal to how you are being attacked. Since your son was in no physical danger, you had no right to "protect" him with an act of physical violence.
I would think that having a mother who punches little boys, and seeing that boy's head split open, will be just as damaging to your child as their taunting, if not more!
2007-06-16 12:12:15
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answer #8
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answered by Bomb_chele 5
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Sorry, you have no right to do that. You escalated a conflict from bullying/taunting to using physical force and in addition to that you assaulted a minor. You will lose hands down in court, it won't even be in question. The issue is NOT whether or not those kids had the right to do what they were doing, and unfortunately you will have no defense to rest on in this one. Your lawyer will just be trying to keep you out of jail.
2007-06-16 12:47:01
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answer #9
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answered by The Scorpion 6
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i totally agree bc i was put in the same situation and my son is 2. i didn't hit the kids but i felt bad bc my son is the type that is friendly to everyone and talks/says hi to whoever he walks by. a couple of 5 year old started calling him a baby and making baby names. my son was so upset. i never told the other kids anything i went to their mother n told her. she proly thought i was being a tattle tale but it was the right thing to do. i could see why she's taking u to court. personally i would of proly hit u myself but i understand where u r coming from.
good luck
2007-06-16 13:28:36
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answer #10
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answered by mmorillos85 2
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