should my sis give her child up for adoption?

Question

MY SISTER JUST HAD A BABY ABOUT A MONTH AGO AND SHES ONLY 14. MY PARENTS DONT WANT ANYTHING TO DO WITH THE BABY SO SHES TAKING CARE OF IT ON HER OWN, SHES BOROWING MONEY FROM FRIENDS. SHE CANT GET A GOOD JOB CUS SHES ONLY 14 AND IS IN 9TH GRADE. I BABYSIT SOMETIMES BUT I HAVE SCHOOL AND HOMEWORK. SHOULD SHE GIVE UP HER MONTH OLD BABY ALYSSA?? =(

Answer 1

sounds like she doesn't havea good support group (besides you) and she can't provide for this baby financially either. She should consider an open adoption! There are many loving parents out there trying to find children when they cant have their own. Yes I think your sister being so young should consider adoption. It will be hard but it will be the best thing for the baby in the long run. Good luck to her!

Answer 2

Wow! This is a hard decision. I'm assuming the father of the babe doesn't what any thing to do with her and the babe?? If she isn't going to be able to really take care of the babe well I would have to consider it. But what about anybody else in the family like aunts, uncles, cousins??? My heart goes out for her and the babe. And wow. You are an excellent sister. If she really wants to keep her she has to find out a way to support the child and make sure she gets every thing that she needs. But hey I just thought of something. There are programs that will help out the family or what ever but its for the people that don't have much money. I think it might be called a head start. But trust me there is a program that I would suggests looking into. She would have to drop the babe off there for the amount of hours and all go to school try to get as much money as possible to take care of the babe. But look for what that program is call we went over it in my child development class. Sorry that I can't think of it but I do hope that information helps you a little bit. But please do allot more researching then this.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Head_Start


I hope this helps. I really wish the best of luck and hope that every thing comes out good in this situation.

Answer 3

Since she loves Alyssa, she should consider open adoption. It is the ultimate sacrifice and she cannot be selfish. It will be hard for her and for you, but you know what, I had only myself and my adoption worker/counselor for support when I decided to give my daughter up for adoption. Your parents, I can't describe the anger I have for that kind of treatment to a young mother and their own grandchild. Your parents should not be the basis for your sister giving Alyssa up for adoption. The emphasis should be for the love of that baby. She does deserve a good life, right? With all kinds of opportunities, that your sis won't be able to provide, because she'll always be ten steps behind. Your sister also deserves a chance to grow up and experience life, not be tied down with enough stuff that most 30 year olds can't even handle.

For the love of Alyssa, ok. tell your sis I said that. Email me if you want, or is she wants to. send it to me,my real name is Heather.

Answer 4

I’d have to say yes I know it may be hard. But she doesn’t seem to have much support, there is only so much cash her friends can give her assuming they are in her age bracket and also don’t have jobs. Where is the baby’s father and his family? Perhaps they would be willing to help her out. If not adoption would be the kindness thing if she can’t provide for the baby. Of course it still important for her to get her education very difficult if she does not have a core support group. She could even do an open adoption if she wanted or a kinadoption where she has a family member adopt the child.

Its too bad your parents are not supportive and dont want to have anything to do with this innocent soul whom did not ask to be conceived.

Answer 5

That would be up to your sister. If she does like the idea, maybe Open Adoptions is a good choice for her. Like the agency called Adoptions from the heart (look it up online) We just adopted our baby from there. The good thing is that she can choose for an open adoption. That means that the people that adopt stay in contact with her, and she can see the baby twice a year (that can be different) If she doesn't want to have her baby adopted, then that's a good choice too. That means she is willing to grown up much faster then any other 14 year old. Maybe you can help her find some help besides you. Go to a counsler at school, they always can find people that can help her out. There is help out there just help her find it. After all she is just a child herself, and you are apparently the only one she has got.

Answer 6

As difficult as it is to say, I really feel that she should consider adoption for her daughter. She could specify that she would like an open or semi-open adoption, that way she can still have a preset amount of contact and know how her girl is.

Of course it is possible for teens to parent, many do it. However, without support from the Father, or the Grandparents of the child, not having any income and being very young, it seems like she is going to have an extremely difficult time, not only her but Alyssa too.

Best wishes and I hope everything works out well. Jenny

Answer 7

This is a personal decision that only your sister can make. But first, she needs someone to talk to. There are programs out there to help young mothers and children. It is important that she is receiving the help that she needs to care for this child. If she does decide to make an adoption plan for her child, she will need a lot of support as well. Is there anyone she can talk to such as a guidance counselor or teacher since your parents are not supportive?

Answer 8

Have your sister contact Social Services as she needs an advocate. Your parents don't have a choice. The costs associated with her baby are now your parents costs until she is 18. It is no different than if she had an accident and they now have to pay to help her buy special equipment for a disability. Your sister is inexperienced both at life and caring for a baby. Give her all the support you can!

A tip for you. Your parents suck as parents. Don't count on them to be supportive of you in future either. I don't have a lot of respect for people who throw away their grandchildren because they are an embarrassment or inconvenience.

Answer 9

she should contact her local social services and explain her situation. They will get her into counseling to help her make the decision to keep it or give it up. And they will offer her some assistance with daycare and parenting classes. And if needed, offer her foster care for her and her child with a family that would be supportive and help mentor her to be a good Mom. Either way, her and the child will benefit. If she believes adoption is the answer, that is a wonderful, very unselfish thing to do.

Answer 10

What's wrong with your parents!! THey are after all the GRANDPARENTS! They will regret this dearly in the future. Why should the baby suffer and not have a relationship with the grandparents because they can't get over their child having a baby at a ypung age. Talk to them! Instill some common sense into them. They are acting very immaturely. You are actingmore mature and helpful than they are, they should learn from YOU.