We have been friends since Yr 5 or from age 11, and she is marrying someone from the UK but getting married in Australia she said she will include the UK people as a compromise to having the wedding here. So next year will be our 20yr "anniversary"
2007-06-16 01:34:22 · 13 answers · asked by wilo_chick 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
I'm from Australia not the states just needed to clafify that sorry :)
2007-06-16 01:41:28 · update #1
You do have the right to be sad, just not mad. She has to do what she feels is best. Hopefully she realizes how much it would have meant to you and will include you in other ways. You can still throw her a shower and be included on lots of other things. I am sorry, I know it is hurtful not to be standing beside her on her big day. I don 't agree with the above answer. You do not want to end such a friendship over this. Then you would REALLY be sad.
2007-06-16 01:38:47 · answer #1 · answered by tired 5 · 4⤊ 1⤋
How do you know you won't be asked to be in your best friend's wedding? Did she tell you she doesn't want you to be a part of the wedding? So what if she's using the UK people as a compromise that doesn't mean she wouldn't want her best friend to stand up with her. I wouldn't feel sad right now but if she doesn't include you then you can be sad. Don't let a wedding ruin a beautiful friendship.
2007-06-16 09:06:06 · answer #2 · answered by sunchine girl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say that you have the right to be sad...you can't help if it hurts your feelings...but at the same time I don't think you have the right to mad at her. I am sure she feels bad enough having to compromise people for the wedding party, she doesn't need one of her best friends behaving like less than a best friend. I know from experience that weddings are tricky and people can get very bent out of shape about "the politics" of them. So my advice to you would be let her know how happy you are for her and her fiance and just enjoy being a part of there wedding, even if it's just attending!! :- )
2007-06-16 19:11:45 · answer #3 · answered by xsarahelizabethx 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can totally understand how you would be sad about this. Weddings can be very stressful and most of the time the bride is doing her best to make everyone happy. I don't think she meant it as a slight to you.
Have you talked to her about the wedding? It's not exactly polite to ask why you weren't asked to be part of the bridal party, but perhaps you could be part of the wedding in other ways? Tell her how much you value your friendship and would like to be part of her special day. You could help her with the preparations or there may be something else during the ceremony she may want you to be a part of.
Good luck!
2007-06-16 11:00:08 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't need permission to be sad.
Tell her that you would really like to be in her wedding, but understand how wedding dynamics are. Sometimes and for varied reasons, the couple has to make some hard choices. It seems like it would be easy to add one more, particularly if it were a person from the area as opposed to importing someone from the UK.
There is also the possibility that she doesn't feel all that close to you after all. You need to talk this out with her. Best wishes.
2007-06-16 08:44:08 · answer #5 · answered by Ara57 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes it's o.k. to be sad. That's a long history for friendship. How come she has to use the UK people to compromise? Why can't her husband to be compromise & allow her to have someone from the states? It's her big day too..
2007-06-16 08:38:49 · answer #6 · answered by Unique Soul 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It's ok to be sad, but not ok to take it personally or become upset in the long run...picking bridesmaids DOES unfortunately get feelings hurt. Just enjoy your friendship, enjoy that wedding, and buy yourself something nice for saving so much money on potential bridesmaid duties!
2007-06-16 14:14:50 · answer #7 · answered by szberi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its ok to be sad, but weddings get tricky. Dont take it personally. At weddings people always get upset, whether its because they werent included in the bridal party or because of where they were seated at the reception. Just let your friend enjoy her day and do everything to help her and provide support. Its tough trying to please everyone remember.
2007-06-16 08:50:37 · answer #8 · answered by Click 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
awww i'm sorry to hear that! I would be sad too. I feel like people put people in their weddings that are important to them.
2007-06-16 08:48:06 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you may have to look up the definition of 'best friend' in the dictionary, as clearly it does not apply here or at least it is a one way relationship. Sorry.
2007-06-16 08:42:29 · answer #10 · answered by Oliver T3 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋