Here lately, my boyfriend and I have been having problems. He wants to be out all night with his friends, while I'm at home waiting for him to call. He never calls me when he gets home, and when I finally get a hold of him, he's either too tired to talk, or he wants to leave with his friends again. He says that it shouldn't be a big deal, and that I should trust him. You see, the problem isn't that I don't trust him, it's that I barely talk to him for longer than 30-40 minutes a day now, and I'm starting to feel like I'm not important to him anymore. Usually, you couldn't pay him a million dollars to get off the phone with me, or to not see me. He never wants to spend time together anymore; i have to beg him to come to my house. He acts like he's annoyed when he's with me, but he says everything's okay, and that he loves me. But he doesn't even act like he loves me anymore, and he said hearing me say "I love you" is annoying now, and he hates it. Does he truly love me? What do I do?
2007-06-15 20:49:26 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Maybe he is worried that things are going too fast, and needs a little space. Give it some time and see where it goes.
2007-06-15 20:52:20 · answer #1 · answered by The Real Deal 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he may still care for you but wants his freedom - some space. Also, the thrill is gone.
He also may be acting like this so you'll break up w/ him & he doesn't have to be "the bad guy."
Ask yourself - what do you want? Do you love him? What do you want to do? Do you want a commitment? Do you want freedom? What's going on in your life?
A few options:
Don't chase him. Pursue your own interests. Spend more time w/ your own friends. See what happens.
Break it off if you're ready to do so.
Ask him point blank, what he wants & be ready to deal w/ whatever he says. Is he trying to avoid being the bad guy but really wants to break up? Is he bored? Is he not ready for commitment?
Frankly, if you have to ask if he truly loves you - you already know the answer, right?
2007-06-15 20:57:29 · answer #2 · answered by Treadstone 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if hearing you say i love you is annoying now...do you really thing he truly loves you..because he should never get tired of hearing i love you or sayin i love you.But do you have friends??? Why dont yoo go out with them nd see if he notices nd likes it. Because sooner or later he is goin 2 relize your are gone. You cant sit around for him you are a person 2. Your have 2 life your life whether he wants cut up or not.
2007-06-18 16:49:52 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hun, like I use to tell my girls and their girl-friends that were having boy trouble.
Dump the Dude!
He wants his cake and to eat it too.
He wants to go out and "hang out" with the guys, which means doing what guys do best, mack on girls.
But he wants you to seat around and be there when he feels the need for you.
No way, you need to get on with yourself and go out with the girls!
you said "he doesn't even act like he loves me anymore, and he said hearing me say "I love you" is annoying now, and he hates it. Does he truly love me?
No that is not love by any shape or means.
He is playing you and its time to have him hit the road.
When he says he hates it and it annoys him, that's just a kind way of saying, you annoy him and the relationship.
Run huh, run and have safe fun and don't look back!!
2007-06-15 20:58:07 · answer #4 · answered by kitty 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you need to find your own life. Go out with your friends. He may feel like you are being "clingy". I am sorry for using that word, I hate the term clingy. If hearing "I love you" is annoying to him, stop saying it. See if not hearing it is more annoying than hearing it. If he loves you and is just feeling "smothered", then things will begin to improve. Be strong, keep your pride, and respect yourself. If any of his actions turn to emotional abuse or if he becomes verbally/physically abusive, seek help fast. Good luck!
2007-06-15 20:56:38 · answer #5 · answered by Laverne 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
men feel withdrawal when you get too attached to them. They like the thrill of the chase, and if you're just throwing yourself at him, he won't appreciate it. You've become too clingy, so he's become mean about it. No, he doesn't love you anymore, because he says that he hates hearing that you love him.
In your next relationship, do not get wayyyy too attacehd to the guy, because you'll just scare him away. Instead, always make sure that he's more attached to you than you are to him. That creates the chase that guys love.
2007-06-15 20:53:36 · answer #6 · answered by Anita 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's hard to say whether he loves you or not. But, regardless... You don't need to be treated this way. If hearing you say "I love you" is annoying to him, I think it's time for you to start meeting new people, wouldn't you agree? Go out with friends, meet new people, and let him beg for your affection!
He may end up realizing what he's missing, or you may find someone more deserving of your affection.
2007-06-15 21:02:15 · answer #7 · answered by ~♥Sasha♥~ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's emotionally detached from you now. So, it sounds like he's not really in love with you (and maybe never was). It does sound like he was infatuated with you at one time. Infautation can die off quickly.
Why don't you try seperating from him for awhile and hanging with your girlfriends. Test to see how long it takes him to call. See if he's jealous of the time you spend with your girlfriends. It's fairplay. If he lives through what you're going thru and "get's it", then maybe he'll change his tune.
2007-06-15 20:54:53 · answer #8 · answered by Zeltar 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's getting ready to break up with you, and probably has something going on the side. Trust me, I've been there and done that, same with men and women both.
2007-06-15 20:54:17 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe he dint deserve to be you're boyfriend, cause he dint even bother to call you, & when you call him, he tells his tired so i could say he dint love you, and all you can do is to forget him cause his waisting only you're time, he dint truly love you....and even care for you..maybe his only using you for some reason, but before you broke up with him ask him, if he really love you or not? then that all.
fine another who's deseving...
maybe he fell bored on you
2007-06-16 04:05:51 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋