My best friend, also my maid of honor, has a tasteless SKULL tattoo on her left shoulder. She's getting mad at me because I either want it covered up with dermablend or with a long sleeve dress. I don't want a skull tattoo in my wedding pictures that are going to last a lifetime. What to do... ?
2007-06-15 11:39:43 · 32 answers · asked by ♥Ashley 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Note: She also has one on her back and on both feet. I'm not asking her to cover up those since I don't think there will be feet or back pictures. I'm not trying to be a bridezilla or anything like that either. ♥
2007-06-15 11:42:38 · update #1
She is my best friend and their isn't anyone to replace her. She's my other half and we fight like sisters. This isnt going to cause a riff between us. What I'm irritated about is that she told me she would cover it up on the day and now she's p!ssed at me for really wanting her to.
2007-06-15 12:58:57 · update #2
As a wedding planner, I would say to your friend that she needs to remember why she's at your wedding. This is your day, and these photos will be your memories. Even if the tattoo means something special to her, she should be willing to cover it for the sake of your special day. It's not as if you're asking her to get it laser removed, you simply don't want it to be in the photos. But by the same token, I would have you speak to her. Tell her that she's your friend and means something to you, that's why you chose her for such a special support position in your life. It's an HONOR to be chosen. You disagreeing with her tattoo doesn't mean you dislike her as a person. A true friendship should be able to make simple accommodations for each other. It's a give-and take.
2007-06-15 11:47:07 · answer #1 · answered by Meghan O 2 · 7⤊ 7⤋
Well, you can ask her to cover it up with make-up (and be completely honest about why you want her to do this) or you can have all of the bridesmaid wear odd-looking dresses with sleeves OR you can prioritize and think about what the role of maid of honor is supposed to symbolize. If she's your best friend, then you have the choice between having a tacky skull tattoo in a few photographs or offending your best friend terribly. I'd opt for the first choice; how many pictures really feature the maid of honor's left shoulder anyway? The major picture is going to be of you and your new husband so as long as you don't get an ugly tattoo on your forehead, you'll be fine. Good luck!
2007-06-15 11:55:05 · answer #2 · answered by koi-ness 5 · 1⤊ 3⤋
You'll have to tell her that you really want her to be your maid of honor but her tattoos are not going to be in the picture. If you have her wear a long dress with probably long gloves. And You just have to tell her it's your special night and that you love her. It's only for one night and it's not that your ashamed of her tattoos because your not. You just want your wedding night to be perfect and if she was in your situation you would cover up whatever she wanted you to cover up.
2016-03-13 23:41:56 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think part of the problem may be how you've approached this situation. I don't have tattoos, but if I did and was in a wedding and was informed that the bride's priority in choosing a bridesmaid's gown was to cover my tattoo, I think I'd be a bit miffed. If, on the other hand, the bride informed me the gown she'd chosen had sleeves because it was simply the dress she liked best, I wouldn't have a problem.
On the other hand, I think both of you need to sit down and really consider your priorities in this matter. bridesmaids down the ages have suffered through horrible dresses for the sake of friendship, and a true friend doesn't try to make her friends ashamed of how they look. If her appearance is that horrible to you, why did you ask her to be your Maid of Honor? If you're her best friend why is she so upset at the idea of wearing a dress with sleeves for one day?
In short, I think both of you need to sit down and try to really understand where the other is coming from. Then maybe you can work out a reasonable compromise.
2007-06-15 12:52:34 · answer #4 · answered by gileswench 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It is your wedding. Don't go on about it, and lose a friendship. Choose a different maid of honor, preferably a relative, as there is no room for argument, or "you chose someone else because..." It will be a relative.
She isn't much of a friend if she insists on displaying herself at YOUR wedding. Although she may be great in other ways, it is an important day in your life. Don't compromise.
2007-06-15 12:36:48 · answer #5 · answered by Marissa Di 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
A tattoo is very personal to people who get them and often have great meaning. It's a part of her personality which is why you lover her and want her as a bridesmaid isn't it? Don't push the issue. Perhaps you can provide all of the bridesmaids with pretty shawls in a complimentary color that she can use for a few of the pics that will cover it. Tattoos are widely accepted now since tons of people have them.
If the only problem is the tattoo being in your wedding pics the photographer or whoever develops your pics can easily airbrush it out for you.
2007-06-15 11:47:52 · answer #6 · answered by pspoptart 6 · 6⤊ 1⤋
Personally I dont think you should tell her to cover it up because it is part of her. Tattoos are very special to those of use who have them. However, since she already agreed to cover it up, then I think she should follow through with it. You should remind her that she agreed to and if she didnt want to then she shouldnt have agreed to it. It's great that you have a friendship that this wont cause a rift in cuz too many times friendships are disolved because of a wedding and that is really a shame.
2007-06-15 17:34:14 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I agree with JM. Why did you ask her to do it then if you don't like her tattoo?
You need to respect her for who she is. Good photographers can edit out tattoos in photos you know.
I'm not usually a rude person, but when someone tries to change someone else, that's just rediculous.
2007-06-15 13:48:55 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
You knew she was tattooed prior to asking her to be in the wedding party. When you asked her, you get the whole package tattoo and all.
If you don't want it shown in pictures, make sure the photographer knows this and positions her so her tattooed shoulder is not in the picture.
2007-06-15 17:37:06 · answer #9 · answered by Terri 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I don't think your being unreasonable. I would sit her down and tell her that it's your wedding and you would appreciate it if for one day (at least the ceremony and pictures) to cover up the tattoo. I know that if my best friend asked me to cover my tattoo I wouldn't throw a fuss, however that would be a dress that showed 1/2 my butt. Tattoos can mean something to some people, they can be trashy and tacky too. I hope your friend is caring enough to understand.
2007-06-15 14:50:37 · answer #10 · answered by Tyler and Kassidy's momma 4 · 1⤊ 3⤋