***BEST ANSWER GUARANTEED***Question: Ok i guess i'm just looking for insight?

Question

I love my boyfriend. And he loves me. I know this. But he's broken up with me twice. He was under aLOT of stress from college problems, as well as exams and major family problems erupting. The first time he broke up with me he was freaking out about us. I allowed for that. He confesses he's very protective of himself.
The second time, he'd been going through a period of so much stress that he wasn't even himself anymore. he was still good to me, but seeing him so distant was making me unhappy. but i stood by him. he broke up with me that time (2 months after the first time) suddenly and rashly. because "he thought he was doing the right thing". we didn't talk for a month because we both had exams. then straightaway he begged for me back. i was very reluctant but he said he'd never been so serious about anything in his life before. his friends have confirmed they've never seen him so set on anything. he even offered to go into counselling if the stress hits him like that again.

i'm giving him another shot. it's going really well so far. although it's only been over a week. he's opened up to me alot more and is being very attentive to my feelings. he's always been my best friend.
thing is now, my friends hate him. they think i'm an idiot. i know how protective friends are, and if it were my friend i'd probably be the same. but it is my decision.

Answer 1

You're friends hate him because he has hurt you twice already, and they are just looking out for you because they dont want to see you get hurt yet again. You just have to trust your own heart in this situation. But im serious when I say that if he breaks up with you again, that would be strike three, and you should move on and find someone that will not hurt you like that. You can still remain friends if that would happen, ut you cant keep letting him walk all over you. You have taken him back twice already, so he probably thinks that he can drop you and come back to you whenever he wants, and you have to let him know that that is not acceptable. Good luck with that, and dont be mad at your friends for hating him, they are seriously just looking out for you and dont want to see you get hurt again.

Answer 2

Goodness. Things have been rough for you both!

I can see why your friends would want to be protective of you and are angry with him. Do they know about what you've said here and his agreement to go to counseling? Are there other things about the relationship that aren't mentioned here?

I would be concerned about the relationship if the first thing he chooses to do is to run away and shut out the person who he is supposed to be the closest to (you) at the first sign of trouble.

You said you were "very reluctant" to take him back this time. Are you sure you aren't ignoring some type of sign or red flag about this guy that your friends see? Can you look at the relationship with the eyes of an outsider? Would that outsider see this move as being a good one? Only you can answer that.

I don't think there's anything wrong with giving him another chance, but this should be the LAST time. Trust your gut and make sure if things don't change that you are the one to break up with him, permanently.

Listen to your head as well as your heart. Good luck.

Answer 3

I know all about my friend hating my boyfriend for being an jerk. If your with him your friends will understand but they will not like him. The only way they will is through time. Over time, as long as he stays true and doesn't keep dong that stupid crap, your friend will realize he's there for you not for himself and that he really does love you. Like his "stressing out". He shouldn't wait for another "episode" to get counseling. He should be getting it right now so he's prepared for when it happens. That would definitly give him brownie points with your friends that he is actually trying. You should mention it. they have councelers at school to help Kids deal with the stress of school and life. Thats what they are there for. BTW There should be no excuses on his part about not doing it since it's the whole reason you two broke up, twice! I hope all goes well with you and yours but a note of caution. If this continues, only you can decide when you've had enough.

Answer 4

Ok, do you both go to the same college? If you do, focus on school and less on each other.. If it's meant to work out in the long run it will. However, getting an education is what you both should be doing.. If you know that exams are coming up and it causes anxiety for the both of you then by all means take a "break" from each other... If you go to seperate colleges- by all means try and have an open/honest relationship and be supportive of each other... The relationship does sound one sided though, that you are always willing to work on things and he's running around like a chicken with his head cut off. You might want to take a break for awhile... If he's commit a phobe....That will carry on past college...I know trust me I dated my now husband for nearly 12 yrs. waiting for him to get his head outta his butt.....So, instead of fighting and breaking up - take a break and see other people. It sounds severe, but so is wasting your life on someone who's not serious about you...

Answer 5

I think that following your heart in this situation is the right thing. Sometimes people do need breaks from their love ones. The fact that he said he would go into counseling with you shows that he is commited to trying to make it work with you. Try to explain this to your friends and see how it goes. Hope I helped -- Chels<3

Answer 6

your right it is you decision. Freinds,are you sure they are your friends? i mean they clain to be your friends but sometimes they just want what you have and they dont want to see you happy. im not sayin that this is the case but it could be. but look if he is good to you and he has never done anything to disrespect you and has been there for you,then why wouldnt you give another chance. i mean you have stood by his side thru all this and you havent given up on him, doesnt that tell you something? if this was a guy you dont see yourself with in the future then why would you waste your time. just by what you have said i can tell that you love him and will stick by his side thru it all. if doesnt give you a reason not to wanna be with him then follow your heart cuz in the end its for you and no one else. good luck with that!

Answer 7

Well it definitely seems like he wants to make it work. Go with what you think is right. If you really think he's commited and it will work, then go with that. You can't blame everything on stress, but it does make people do crazy things sometimes. I hope things work out for you two!

Answer 8

if he truly has changed good but if it happens again think about the future. if you were married there is alot of stress in a marriage at times. but your friends need to lay off its good that they are protective but ultimately its your life. try explaining to them the changes that have occur ed in him, and he has a little proving himself to your friends to do. but time will change the way your friends feel.

Answer 9

maybe u should just give him a little space for a while until he cools down if he is suffering from a lot of stress. maybe try to loosen him up and help him relax, if that doesn't work, then maybe u should wait a while or just find a different guy.

Answer 10

Follow you heart hun! thats all you can do! Your friends don't feel what you feel inside! pluse if they are true friends then they WILL stand behind you on everything you want to do. And If being with this boy makes you happy then your friends should be happy for you to.