at what point do we as parents say no more money you need to get a job?

Question

wow lots of good answers
I was asking because my 23 year old has 2 children of her own and for some reasion she thinks we should take care of them all and I am comeing to think that I am only willing to see that the grand children have what they need and
she needs to get a job for what she wants.
its hard for me to understand because we did not rase her to think it is ok to be a bum

Answer 1

Nosnod - sounds like you are at that point already.

My husband is more of a "stand on your own two feet" type of parent than I am. We started giving our kids allowances when they each started school. All of our children have always had daily/weekly chores. When they wanted things beyond what they could get with their allowances, we suggested additional chores for cash. As they got older (but too young for a regular job) our kids also did chores for neighbors (mowed lawns, shoveled snow, etc) for extra cash. The result of this was that when they were old enough to get part-time jobs, my two oldest were READY and WILLING to work. My youngest is now working a part-time summer job.

My youngest will be a sophomore in high school in September, my two oldest are both in college and both work full-time in the summer and part-time during the school year.

If you are tired of being the cash cow to your child(ren) then tell them to get a job!

Answer 2

It really depends on what the money is for. If it's for a car, tell them you will help them if they can actually start looking for a job and pay for most of it, then they will be more appriciative of the car. If it's to help pay bills than sure, but don't pay the enitre bill, you can help them with it but they need to be able to be indipendant and not have to depend on mom and dad for everything. In my opinion it is unhealthy to just give your child money for anything that they want to do. And by spoiling the child it doesn't help them learn to much, because they are having everything handed to them. Let them know that there are boundaries and that they have to learn at some point. The earlier the better in general.

Answer 3

Well growing up I liked the way my parents did things with me if I wanted something like a new bike they would buy me the first one but if I wanted other things to go with it I had to purchase them myself but once i hit 16 and could drive every where and could hold a full time job I paid for all my stuff because they also have two other girls to raise and I only thought it was fair that they spent the same amount on them as they did me.

Answer 4

As a child I worked in my father's store from age 6. Once I was 16 I got my working papers and have been working ever since. My husband on the other hand had parents who gave and gave. He has a problem holding on to money as since it's always been handed to him life is easy. You are not doing your child any favors by supporting them as when you are not able to help then what. My answer to your question is say no starting today.

Answer 5

My mom asked me to get a job between my junior and senior year in high school but still paid for necessities and I paid for things like: gas, anything fun with friends, extra clothes that I want but don't need, and material items that were more of a "want." This proved to be a good experience to me because it introduced me to the working world before I was forced to do it and it helped me learn responsibility for my own spending.

Answer 6

When what they want goes beyond the basics of food, clothing & shelter. My daughter - age 17- pays for her own cell phone plan ($10/mo + texting $5/mo). I pay for the haircut - she pays for the highlighting. She wanted to get her nails done - she pays for that. I pay for some clothes - usually at the start of school & then in Spring - and she pays for whatever esle she wants. She is also saving to buy a car. She has been working since she was 14.

Answer 7

well first of all im not saying u didnt raise your kids right or wroung but there is a limit on how much is enogh if the kid is old enough to do n e type of work like neighbors lawns etc taking out the neighbors trasg to where they can earn money them selfs u need to instill that early that u can get them things they need and wha tu can afford but if the want say nike shoes and u can afford or refuse to pay the out rages price tell them hey u dont need name brand but if u have to have it earn the money and buy them for yourself , if thr


IF THE KID IS STILL IN HIGHSCHOOL U NEED TO HELP THE CHILD WELL ACTUALLY U R RESPONSIBLE FOR THAT CHILD BY LAW TILL 18 BUT IF THEY GO TO COLLEGE YOUR INCOME IS BASED ON IF THEY GET FINACIAL AID UNTILL THEY R LIKE 24 , BUT I SAY ONCE THE KID IS 18 AND OUT OF HIGH SCHOOL THEY SHOULD BE MAKING SOME FORM OF MONEY TO HELP OUT

i told my own kids if u need it ill get it clothes shoes etc but if its something they want and i cant afford or clothes that i cant aford then they need to get some type of job , (yard work , taking neighbors trash etc collecting cans etc ) and buy the items there selfs , this will teach them how to save for things , and realize how hard it may be on others , and it will also teach them to appreciate and take care of the things they buy or others buy for them

Answer 8

Usually at 16 when they can get a work permit.
If their fun stuff with friends is getting expensive, just say no.
Otherwise, you need to teach them about managing their money allowance better.

Answer 9

whan they make no effort to find employment or attend college faithfully and they do nothing at home to help earn it. i did it with my 21 yr old when he was 18 and again with my 19 yr old when he was 17. the longer you hand things to them the longer they will continue. that's a fact.

Answer 10

When they're out of school. They should be getting an education or getting a job- sometimes both,