Should men be allowed to hit a women back?

Question

I was wondering about this. Women want equality, right? So they have to accept the good and the bad. I want an answer out of the typical scope of 'men are bigger, the woman starts it, etc'.

Should this be socially accepted...in self defense? Also I'm not familiar on this cultural aspect, but do are women encouraged to hit back if the man strikes first? I want a serious answer.

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Answer 1

Ignore the gender.

Should you hit a person? No.

Should you hit a person *back*? You certainly have a right to defend yourself, but you have to live with the consequences.

Answer 2

Staunch feminist AND pacifist here.

Hitting is just not an effective method of problem-solving -- even in response to being hit.

It just escalates hostilities and leads to more hitting.

If hitting back is the only way to not be assaulted further, then hitting back enough to ward off further attack, I mean, if you really MUST, wouldn't be the worst thing in the world.

Getting the F away is better.

Calming the person, if possible, is better still, though rarely easy.

No hitting should ever be socially accepted.

Hitting means all human methods for dealing with conflict have lost out.

My experience as a woman (who's never actually been hit -- well, except by my big brother when I was little) is that women are taught to not hit back, as that will make things worse.

Getting away is really the best thing to do.

I mean, you aren't dealing with a human being, when things get to the hitting point -- the least you can do is retain YOUR humanity.

Oh, and press charges, as hitting is assault and battery and therefore against the law.

Getting any nearby people to restrain the violent might be a better idea than becoming violent oneself.

Answer 3

I don't believe in the double-standard. I can counter the "men are bigger" argument with the following: if I hit another man that is obviously bigger and stronger than me, am I exempt from getting hit in return, or should he not be allowed to "escalate the violence"?

Some degree of equality has to exist. If my fiance hits me, she should fully expect to be hit in return; she also knows that, which should serve as a deterrent to keep her temper and behavior under control. That issue hasn't come up in argument, just in conversation of equality and we're on the same page about this one.

I agree with Peter D: ignore the gender. I would add that if you don't want to get hit, then don't hit. It need be no simpler than that.

Also, I generally find it curious whenever I read on Yahoo! Answers on men hitting women vs women hitting men. People mostly assume that the man deserved to get slapped, but the woman was an innocent victim. Want to be treated as an equal? Start acting like one.

Answer 4

Actually, it is tought in school's (have been out that school for over 5 years now) if someone is beatting you up at all you are not allowed to hit them. If you do hit back then you both get in trouble.

Realisitcly, if someone is threatening you hold them down (if you are bigger) or hit them back. Regaurdless of man/women you can be beaten to death or very seriously injurred so you should be able to protect yourself.

Women (depending on where they are from) are tought to run away or call for help if a man hits.

Answer 5

I wouldn't want to hit a woman, even if she attacked me.
Homicide stats...

Male offender /Male victim 65.1%
Male offender /Female victim 22.4%
Female offender /Male victim 10.1%
Female offender /Female victim 2.4%

If you include Homicide, Sexual Assault, Armed Robbery, Aggravated Assault and Simple Assault about 14% of violent crime is commited by women.

However distinguishing between violent criminal activity and violent activity women commit violent acts once for every 7.15 times a man commits a violent act to me that makes them 13% the threat. Then you must consider the damage a woman can cause compared to a man. I might physically restrain a woman however for her own safety. I might actually hit her if I could discern she was intent on killing me or had already stabbed or shot me other than that nope. Every behavior is appropriate given the right circumstance.

Answer 6

I don't think anyone should be hitting anyone else. If a woman hits a man, then I would tell him the same thing I would tell her if the situation were reversed. If you are in danger, do what you have to do to get away from the person who is endangering you, and seek help. Unfortunately, most men would be embarrassed to go to the police and say my wife/girlfriend is abusing me. If you hit her back, she now has the right to go to the police herself and say that you are abusing her, and if it comes down to her word against yours, unless you are abnormally small, and/or she is abnormally large, she is the one people will believe.

Answer 7

ok my husband has had this problem w/his first marriage.
His first wife used to scratch, smack, throw things when she'd get mad. (at anyone by the way). One night she went "off the hook" and punched him in the back then smacked him in the face. He held his temper and didn't slap back. As most boys are taught growing up not to hit a girl he didn't. Well, I guess she got madder since he would not respond and threw a glass vase at him next. Well, he's had enough and was afraid of what she'd do next so he grab her and pushed her against the wall (he did not hit/smack her or anything) untill she calmed down a bit.
I still feel you shouldn't hit back no matter if a male/female hits you first. All you will do is ESCULATE the fight not stop it or calm the other person down.

Answer 8

I don't think that the woman should be striking out any more than the man.
What we need here is a little "NVCI"
Non Violent Crisis Intervention is a system to minimize violence toward the individual.
It ranges from how to talk to someone to de-escalate their anger, to holds to prevent further damage. I think that is what you need to look at instead of striking back.
Judo is a martial art that teaches holds that could be useful.

Answer 9

No I do not think men have the right to hit a women back, I am not being hypocritical because I am not saying it's right for women to hit men! Although in the sense that If men were allowed to hit a women back then I think men would get used to the fact of hitting women. I just got out of a heavily abusive relationship so from experience of domestic violence that when a man hits a women and she is fearing him, her body shuts down she cannot defend himself...that is not the case for a man.

Answer 10

Remember- in any fight, he who calls the cops first, wins.

You've got to defend yourself. If a woman is trying to kill a man, he should hurt her enough to get her off him and run. If a man tries to kill a woman, the same thing. A man just needs to make it obvious that he just did what he had to do because women are assumed the victim by default.

Answer 11

Yes in some instances, in my opinion, its OK to hit a girl, however you have to remember that girls usually aren't as strong as men and you should show some restraint.

But violence is stupid all together. The best thing to do is try to act like adults. If she is being stupid and picking a fight- leave and don't come back.