My mom dosn't seem to love me ...?

Question

Ok. me and my mom have never really gotten along. but about a week ago we started getting along really good. but then my aunt,uncle, and two cousins Josh and john came down from alaska to visit for a week. this past week has been a living hell. it seems like my mom thinks my cousin john is her son. she treats him like her own son and then she treats me like some random person off the street! like say he's watching tv. i walk past it quickly,she screams at me like i just slapped him or somthing! then see if he throws my $200.00 i-pod into the pool, she yells at me and asks if he's ok!!! omg i have no idea what i should do! i've tried everything but my mother just dosn't seem to like me. and lately the though of running away has been passing through my mind. Please. I'm desperate. What should i do??

Answer 1

You poor thing, Im not sure what you can do. It's her problem though, not yours. Don't blame yourself and don't suffer for her issues. Rise above it. remind yourself that you will not be like that with your children.

Answer 2

My mom actually has mental problems which has prevented me from getting close to her. I'm 30 now and don't really speak to my mom at all, it's sad. So I can speak from experiance. I'm a mom now, and can play devils advocate. I know when you have company sometimes you want to show them hospitality and you think your kids could take the abuse of scolding or complaining. Just the same as if you had an aunt over and someone did something to make you mad, you'd probably yell at your mom if she did it, but not have gotten so mad at your aunt if she did it. We always feel like we could treat worse the people we love the most. It's wrong I know. But let me tell you from experience. Running away is not a good idea! I've done it multiple times to excape physical out-of-control abuse, and it never solved anything. Expecially when I was doing it at a young age. When I was 18 I ran away for good to save my life. Like I said coming from a mentally ill mom that night she was going to kill me! So I ran away for safety, and for good. But in your case you sound pretty young and by law you're going to have to go back. And with todays day and age there are too many creeps out there you don't want to come into contact with! Keep in mind what I said about your mom trying to be hospitable to your guest. And know that yes you mother loves you! When you hit a certain age it's a natural battle between parents. You are needing independence, because you're growing up. But remember your whole life she's been taking care of you, and making decisions for you. So to let go and let you do it on your own is hard for moms. Hope this helps, hang in there! This too shall pass...

Answer 3

wait til things calm abit. then tell your mother that you need to talk seriously. i know where you are coming from. I was adopted at age two. my adopted mother never let me forget that my adopted brother and i were just replacements for their two children that had died. my mother was drunkard. when she would drunk(every night) my father would tell at me that if i were a better daughter my mother would not drink,if i were a better sister my brother wouldn't be drinking and using drugs, if i were a better person the world would be a better place. i'm 51 now it went on until they died. I was in my 30's when they both died. i look back now and wish that i had handled things differently. so see i really do understand. But running away is not the answer. you did not say old you are,so i am guessing teens probably early to mid teens. have you tried talking to your counsellor at school. your minister,your preacher, your rabbi. if not you really should. i know that when i was growing up (growing up is a very painful and difficult time,i doubt it has changed all that much) there was a hotline number that teenagers could call for help or just talk to. they were well trained young people in their late teens and earlly twenties. you might want to ask around. try social services also see if they know of any groups out there that could possibly help you. good luck

Answer 4

I would wait until your visiting family left, and then try to talk with your mom. Let her know how you feel, and see what she says. Although my mom and I got along really well, she always seemed to stress when visitors came. That might be the case here.

But if it isn't, try to spend as little time at home if they come back.

Once they are gone, try to spend some one-on-one time with your mom doing things you both like.

If you are under 18, running away will not get you very far. At the very least, if things get to be unbearable see if your best friend has a mom that you could talk to or stay with.

Answer 5

Of course your mom loves you, she just doesn't know how to show it properly. I would suggest that you keep showing your feelings towards your mom in a positive way. Your mother might be going through some rough times and what she really needs is some strong support. I know it sounds like I am siding with her, but you only have one mother in a life time. I lost my mother 9 years ago and we didn't always have the best relationship. I hate that I never had a great relationship with her, my children really didn't get to know her. It saddens me to know that I wasn't the only person to have a not so perfect relationship with my mother. Be strong for yourself and for the children you may have years to come.

Answer 6

I really think you need to talk to your mother about how you are feeling and how she is making you feel. Don't hold back!

I don't think it has anything to do about you personally. She has family visiting from out of state and wants them to have a good time.

Have you ever thought that something might be bothering your mother? Maybe there is something that she needs help with and is keeping it to herself. Please don't assume the worse. Your mother loves you very much.

I understand that you are desperate, but don't run away, that will make things worse, and will hurt your mom more than anything. Please talk to her and let your feelings be known.

Good luck. I know everything will be okay.

Answer 7

Do not run away. Talk to your Mom about it, but wait until the guests are gone. You may not have gotten along before, but if you maturely discuss how you've been feeling with her, you may begin to get along better. Just sit down with her and tell her exactly how you feel--don't hold back. She needs to know how you feel. She does love you. She loves you unconditionally, she just doesn't always show it.

Answer 8

I'm sorry that you are going through this. But sometimes parents are harder on the kids that they want to succeed. Maybe Mom is just stressed out right now. There is always more going on inside of adults heads than kids could ever know.

Answer 9

Don't run away. Just be calm and patient, give her space. You are her daughter, her child, nothing can replace that. Continue to respect her and try to love your cousin as well, she will notice just how special you are. Prove to her that you love her and that she means a lot to you, be patient.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 8Love never fails. (1 Corinthians 13:4-8)

Answer 10

Your mother loves you very much,as a mother i can tell you that i know she loves you more than words can ever say,as far as the cousins,do not worry, she loves them to,but in a different way my child,as a parent child bond is so close,no one can ever get between that,no matter what you might think Rev.Karen look at Jesus?do you think mary his earthly mother that gave birth to him, loved him( jesus) or his cousin john more? Think about it my child

Answer 11

My mother did not love me either. Do what you can to get along, keep yourself clean and straight and you will be at college soon and you won't have to worry about it as much.

It is a hard thing to go through, but there is nothing you can do to make her love you. The best you can do is try to get along. I know how hard it is.