kids getting out of control messing up their rooms and don't mind what too do ?

Question

Have put in time out , taken away privleges, took away toys 4 months ago. Still having problem Out of ideas . HELP !!!

Mine are 5,6,&7 yrs.Thanks ,but we have done everything that has been sugested and did no good . Put toys and box out in the storeage shed . But they take clothes out of closet and drawers , bed clothes off bed . curtains off windows .And throw on floor . Dump water on floor . Its awful ! I don't want them tooo think that they can do this afraid they will live like this when out on their own .

Answer 1

Exert control over them. Get all over them like white on rice, trust me it works. My little nephew use to be the same way, until I got hard on him (he lives with us) now I don't even have to tell him to pick up his toys. Make threats of throwing away the toy, that works and tell them you will do it too. I don't suggest spanking, unless absolutely necessary. Also to make them pick it up, stand there in the room with them and tell them you will watch them do it. If they don't pick it up then pretend to trash it..oh man..does that strike I nerve on them..they will later obey..

Answer 2

Children (with very few exeptions) thrive in mess. My husband and I tired of living in messiness but that's how children are. You can clean up the room and after 10 minutes it's still like it used to be. The reason is children like to play with several things at the same time and what seems a mess to you, might be 10 different projects in the making. That's why childre hate it when you ask them to pick up. How can you pick up their tower when it's not finished yet? Or their cars when they are still waiting to put into the garage he's being built since yesterday? Still children have to learn that order is a good thing so they should be made pick up their rooms at least once a day. Permission can be given to leave one or two toys out but no more. And for sure it will take a long time till they learn (some never do).

Answer 3

How much one on one time do you spend with the youngster, without knowing how many children in the home, etc, you are only going to get generic answers.

It has been my experience that children would rather have negative attention than no attention. unless there is an underlying medical condition, make sure you get the child to a good dr and have them tested.

Do you do things just the two of you?

If you normally ignore a child and then they discover you will pay lots of attention if they refuse to do what you want

Answer 4

Its kids nature to do this. I don't have any idea how old your children are ? My younger two we help them put toys away and clean up. They have a large wooden box their grandfather made them. It makes it easy for them to put the toys etc. in.
Older two which are 10 and 12 are expected to tidy up their rooms before anything else on Saturday morning.
Time out, taking away privledges, talking to your blue in he face never works for this with the younger ones.

Answer 5

my son didn't want to clean his room, he was so adamant on not cleaning his room he rather throw his toys away. literally take the toys from the floor go all the way to the kitchen and tossing them in the trash..... i took ever toy he owns.. EVERY ONE away from him. his room is bare... no toys to make a mess with= nothing to clean. he sure didn't like that. now my problem is when and how to give his toys back.

Answer 6

i just want to let you know. if you cant control them now... there's no hope for the future... if this continues they're going
to be screaming at you and slamming doors even when
they're older... if someone tell you to let this go. DON'T listen.
i believe in respecting elders [call me old fashioned], but
i think you should look into getting someone similar to that
british super nanny on television... if that's not an option....
try to find someone the kids actually listen to... like an
aunt or something, and observe that person's techniques.

Answer 7

I'm going through a similar situation with my lil 4 year old boy... "Taking Away" privileges didn't work because he's too young to conceptualize the "future" rewards being at risk... Taking away his toys out of his room didn't work, because he would just go find them elsewhere in the house; and even later when I hid his toybox in the garage and only gave him a few toys to bring in, he'd tire of them easily and eventually, sneak his way into the garage himself... Even worse, for lack of real "toys" he would start "playing" with non-toy items (Ever have like 10 rolls of toilet paper unrolled, all at once? Ever have candy bits placed into unsuspecting places, like your shoes? etc...)

THEN FINALLY... when he started to make neighborhood friends recently and wanted to play with them outdoors, or wanted to go to a sand or water park, or when he wanted to go out to ride his bike or go swimming.... I said, "HALT... You can do that, IF, you do this and that: Clean room and do other age appropriate light chores!...

Finding out, "What's most important for them RIGHT NOW?" and using that as leverage has been working for me lately.

Answer 8

I actually took all the toys out of my girls room put them on my enclosed porch and made that there play area. kids just can't organize very well.

Answer 9

I have 8 kids... messy rooms come with the territory... the not minding, I have a problem with... I make them my slave for a day... they don't like that and change their attitudes!

Answer 10

Show them examples, teach by example! live the way you want the kids to live, show them: and, they will copy you, and you will see the change for the better!