Can someone explain to me how can my husband....?

Question

just pick up and go. I really thought that only happened in movies. I wonder what happen, sure there were fights and some disagreement but never to the point where i thought he would just pick up and go. I can't stop thinking why he left with no explaination. At this point if i knew it was because of some one else at least i would have an answer. but the answer i am looking for why he left his daughter, he has not seen her or even call her, no letter, no email, no text. some many things. He completly abandoned us. please help me understand

Answer 1

Hello Karen. Yes, it sounds strange. I'm trying to think what might influence a man to do that and I'm having trouble coming up with an answer. The most obvious is another woman...but you've ruled that out. He is either running to something or away from something. If he is running away, he is really running away from himself. He won't be able to do that. He is stuck with himself the rest of his life. If he is running to something, it can be a job, hobby, geographic location, or some opportunity that is so important to him that he leaves you without a word. But this brings us back to running away from something. So I would guess he is running away...from himself. Otherwise he would have talked it over with you. So, your options? Wait. Get on with your life. My suggestion is to get on with your life. He has demonstrated you can't count on him...so count on yourself. Go for it lady, you can do it.

Answer 2

He obviously just ran off, like when a kid brakes a window with a baseball. Instead of staying and explaining what happened, he just ran off to avoid confrontation, very cowardist. Especially abandoning your guy's daughter. I would seek legal help and get child support. I know you must be extremely upset right now, and what I am saying might sound harsh because of what ease I have to say it. But do you really want a man like that treating you like that, abandoning your daughter, is that the kind of man you want her to grow up thinking is ideal?

You could call the police and file a missing person's report even if he was the one who decided to pick up and leave. Atleast that way they can find out what happened and why he left. If you tell him that the two of you have a daughter together too, that may help.

Good luck.

Answer 3

I don't think anyone can explain why. I am so sorry that this has happened to you and your daughter. When I left my first husband, he went for long periods of time without contact with his daughters, at one point, he went over a year without seeing, or talking to them. I think counseling would help you out. There are also groups out there with people of similar stories out there that you could talk to. Most states offer sliding scale type counseling if money is an object. Has he filed for divorce? Are you going to? If you can't afford a lawyer, I would ask for legal aid. The thing about legal aid is this, if he asks for legal aid first, they won't help you. Conflict of interest.

Hold your daughter, hold yourself. Life is hard, but it does get easier. My kids stopped asking about their dad after a time, and as sad as that is, it was the best thing for them at that time. Believe it or not, I went from hating my ex-husband, to not caring at all about him, to now we are friends. He grew up, and so did I. Maybe the same will happen with you two. Good Luck, and I'll give you a cyber hug. :)

Answer 4

Sorry to hear that... This individual seems selfish beyond belief. OK, so, you shared some differences, what does that have do with his daughter? He should a least call his daughter. Children are the true victims in these dilemma. You could be the bigger person and calling up and try to talk some sense into him. Good Luck with you situation.

Answer 5

Regardless of why he's gone, you need to get an attorney PRONTO and file for a separation so he can't empty out your checking, savings and retirement accounts, take out credit cards and loans using your marital credit rating and run up a bunch of bills for you and leave you broke with his kid! You need a legal separation to protect your child at this point.

If you never expected him to just pick up and leave then you can't say "he would never do that". I think he just showed himself capable of abandoning his wife and daughter. How many more things can be considered more reprehensible.

Sorry, honey, you don't have time for tears and self-pity. Right now, you have to work on self-preservation. Start getting all joint accounts closed and put everything in your name. Get legal representation TODAY!!!

Answer 6

Mid life crises!
Obviously he is not worrying about you or your daughter, so it is left up to you.
You need to concentrate on taking care of business for the both of you and let the future and the answers this come as it comes.

We men have times when our brains cease to function, we have brain farts, senior moments and bdd (brain dead disorder). These are all symptoms of Old Age. It usually happens to us older guys at about 50. I don't know why they call it mid life crisis because most of us die long before 100.

This is the time when really good women shine the most and find out that they just thought they needed the guy that they have been cleaning and tending to for all these years.

You may find that after stepping up to the plate and taking over the Head of Household position that you now have more time on your hands, Use this time wisely and treat yourself.

Remember: Behind every good women is herself.

Answer 7

Sorry hon, nobody can reallyanswer that for you but your husband. I can tell you this, though: There are always signs that something is wrong in a marriage. Always. Don't know if that will help you find your answer or not.
You didn't mention your ages or how long you'd been married but that might be another clue. Young men are often overwhelmed when they realize they've become husbands and fathers, and what that really means.
Good luck to you.

Answer 8

honey, I wish there was some closure to give you on this but truthfully the only person that can answer this is him. I will tell you to remain strong for your daughter and try to put your life at a higher level, now that he is no longer there. Hug your daughter as much as possible and stress to her often, that she is not the cause or reason for her father leaving. Many blessing to you and your daughter.

Answer 9

Honestly, maybe he lost his mind, maybe he is involved in something dishonest like stealing or embezzlement, maybe another woman or man has him brainwashed. Whatever it is, it is guaranteed to be more about him and less about you and your child. My advice to you is to enforce your legal rights to the fullest extent, hold onto all of the marital property in your possession, make sure you get a share of his pension, or other retirement benefits awarded to you in your name (including social security income), consider changing the locks on your home, get full custody of your child. Get the best lawyer you can and stay on his or her case. Visit other lawyers in your area so that your husband will not be able to hire them. Sorry this has happened to you, but he has proven to be unreliable so it's all up to you now. You are hurting and wondering why but from a dispassionate point of view, why does not matter.

Answer 10

He would have made contact , even for his daughter. Are you sure nothing has happened to him. I was watching the crime and investigation channel last night and its possible (you cant rule it out) That he has become the victim of the local serial killer, like you say only in the movies.