has anyone ever had a positive outcome from being in love with a married person?

Question

who has had or has a relationship that was a result of an affair. either you or him or both were married and became involved for whatever reasons. i (we) have our own issue individually and have fallen in love. I know most people hate it when two commited people fall in love, they accuse them for being selfish and uncaring people and cast judgement upon those people, but situations happen. don't ever judge until you've walked in another's shoes. i've known two couple who have found each other's soulmates, while in not so good situations. i have known people who have come together in this situation and are still together after 20 years, are there any other positive stories?

as suspected, you are all so judgemental, as if every marriage is perfect and every person who has been cheated on is a saint and those of us who have been involved in an affair are cold hearted demons. Just what I suspected from most people. I am married to a man who is a great father, my kid. But to me he is an alcololic. He drink after they go to sleep and we have no marriage. I left once and I was the bad person and they do not see it. My kids are 11 and 13 and they said I was the bad person, because I hurt daddy. he will not admit to his addiction and conceals it to the puplic so I am the bad selfish woman.
Actually i make 3 times what he does, so I would have to pay him child support. I support us. I met a man who loves me and respects me, but if I leave my kids will be tramatized and my family will hate me. I am not a cold *****, you people need to remember not is all is as it seems, there are secrets in every family. we are all dysfunctional!

ok, so I am really mad with all your attitudes so i need to continue this, cause I am not a bad selfish person, actually the opposite. Cause if I only thought of myself I would have been gone 5 years ago. I could not walk away with my kids crying whileIn tried to leave and my husband was saying to them "she doesnt loves us anymore" so i went back and gave my kids a family. You have to understand, there is no arguing, we just don't talk. I could careless if we ever spoke another word. There is no abuse, just complacentcy. He is happy I support us at $100,000 and he makes $35,000 a year and just is a dad, does his dad thing and gets drunk after the kids go to bed. I'm just suppose to love him because we got married 15 years ago and live with it and not want anything more. Same with the guy I met, his wife hasn't worked at all and her kids are 20 and 22, he's tired of it. Marriage isn't a reason to mooch off of some one for a free ride. But we go getters are the bad people

HW
I am sorry that your husband cheated on you while you were pregnant, I had two pregnancies and would not want that to happen to anyone. But having said that, I do have to say, from experience that someone who is in love does not cheat. I did not have an affair with this person until I was married 13 years and succomb to something I felt I had no other option to. I was in love with my husband for many years and did not cheat, I worked on our issues, he did not. And as hard as it may be for you to hear a person who is in love does not cheat. when I was in love I was totally faithful. A person who find love elsewhere is not in love with you, no matter what. From one who has been on the other side, just because you are married to someone, doesn't mean you don't have to stop trying to be a friend or lover to them. You might want to look at why he went elsewhere. Did you make the wrong chose in a husband and father? Obviously he wasn't what you thought he was, well neither did I

Answer 1

The biggest problem with any relationship that starts with an affair is it's cheating. You can paint the picture as pretty as you like but it doesn't change the facts. Positive stories will be far and few between because the relationship started wrong in the first place. Why can't I call them selfish? A real caring person cheats? What cheaters want are excuses they can come up with plenty but you know what the real problem is you look at a cheaters morals. What goes hand in hand with cheating? LYING! So now this cheating person is also a liar. Sorry but I won't walk in a cheaters shoes I have more respect for my wife and myself and our relationship.
You see instead of working on your relationship to fix things cheaters take the easy way out and they all have some poor lame excuse. Anyone who cheats can they actually look in the mirror and say I'm a good person.....I don't think so.....

Answer 2

Here is my story: I was in love with my husband. He cheated on me while I was pregnant with our first (and only) child until I found out when our son was 6 months old.

During this time, while I was being 100% faithful and growing our child in my womb, he withdrew his attention, love and support from me and gave it to another woman. He became distant and cold toward me and our son, because he was giving all of his time and attention to his mistress and getting cheap thrills in return.

This has torn our family apart, and although I tried to forgive and forget and stayed with him for another 10 months after I found out, I am still devistated and I can't get over it. There is no trust in our relationship, and I feel that he betrayed me and (the unforgivable part) OUR SON.

Now we are divorcing, and because of his affair our son will now grow up without a father and I am a single mother even though I waited to get married and have my first child at age 29...

So, have you ever walked a mile in a 9-months pregnant lady's shoes, who's husband is f*cking some b*tch like yourself? Didn't think so.

You are pathetic and you are destroying innocent people's lives...

Maybe your husband is an alcoholic because he is married to a cheating b*tch?

Answer 3

If is impossible for two committed people to fall in love. You should rephrase your question to say "Most people hate it when two selfish people who are supposed to be married and in a committed relationship fall in love." Sounds to me like your conscious is getting the better of you and you are seeking our approval. No self respecting decent person is going to approve of an immoral and scandalous affair. So crawl back under whatever rock you came from and move on with your life. Unless you confess your sins and give up your sinful ways there will definitely be a place for you in hell. We don't have to judge you. God will. I will pray for you friend. Peace and God bless.

Answer 4

You have 2 choices - you must either both end your marriages (and go through the most emotionally devastating experience ever), in order to be with the person who you (think) you are in love with.

The other (BETTER) choice is to cut this out immediately. The thing that is drawing you together is you are both experiencing difficulty in your own marriages. You are giving each other mutual emotional support and you think that's love. It isn't. Get into marriage counselling.

Answer 5

Sort of. I fell crazy in love with a man who was married. He had 3 young children and a wife who just wanted to be a mumsy housewife. She was a great mum,and Im sure , a good person but he craved excitement and fun...none of which he got at home. I was single at the time so free to do as I pleased. I knew he was married and dismissed his advances for
8 months until I finally slept with him. It was like "coming home ". I had found "The One".
We were both crazy about each other and I hated the fact that he went home to someone else each night.
Fast forward to years later when tbe kids were older, be moved in with me. I thought my life was complete.
We had 8 glorious years together, still crazy in love until I found emails between him and his now ex wife saying how they missed each other and they'd been planning for him to move closer to her ( about 3 hours away). I confronted him, he packed up and moved just 2 mins away from her house. Left me broken-hearted and single .

Answer 6

I wish it did have a happy ending..but...no luck. I think most are like this; 'how it was in the beginning is how it will be in the end' just from personal experience; if it starts out as an affair it will end as an affair (another person) But I would love to know people who did succeed.

Answer 7

I often have many friends that are extremely too chuffed with their shitty lives. I used to have an excellent style of friends, get one thousand's of myspace comments and all that stuff- I rather wasn't lonely. Now, i deleted all those debts and stopped speaking to my previous "friends". Now I in trouble-free words have some. I used to get 84384 calls an afternoon and texts, as at as quickly as as back- now I in trouble-free words get some. Am i lonely? No. I supply up smoking pot and adjusted my life around.. now i bypass hiking and many times meet people there, i meet people on the well-being center, i leased a horse and met a bunch of persons on the ranch. purely come out of the abode and do matters you rather savor doing- there you will meet people purely such as you... and you is only no longer so lonely. you're in all probability lonely when you consider that the you do no longer fit in with those people. specially circumstances its concepts-blowing to branch off and function time to locate your self.

Answer 8

You will never have trust in this relationship. As the old saying goes "If he does it with you, he will do it to you". I guess that goes for the both of you. Sounds like 2 garbage trucks headed for a head-on collision to me! No offense! It just sounds very messy. I cannot possibly vindicate this situation with a positive perspective.

Answer 9

Have you tried to walk in the shoes of the person being cheated on?

You are looking for positive stories so you can justify why you are cheating now.

Answer 10

Sir Richard got it right.Don't look for fairy tale stories to make what you are doing seem acceptable.Think about the other people that will get hurt instead of focusing on your on guilty pleasures.