You used to date them, or to be married to them, and one day when you are not together any more, you decide you have to hate each other! Sorry but that is stupid. Is it only because we can't put up with the fact that they have hurted us?
We used to had good moments with them, can't we just keep it that way?!
2007-06-13 10:06:57 · 30 answers · asked by alLe 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
once a relationship ends, it’s very hard to deal with all the positive and negative emotions you feel for someone who is now gone. you both know its over for whatever reason and can never be brought back together again so the easiest thing to do is hold on to the negative emotions and hate each other because the positive emotions will only keep bringing you back together again but never solving the problem that broke you up in the first place. plus it can make things worse if only one person wants to hold on to the positive emotions and reunite while the other one has moved on and doesn’t want to feel anything at all anymore, or is now feeling those emotions with someone else. it’s like being hurt all over again but now no one's to blame but the person who just couldn’t let go like the other one did. hating each other also helps you remember why you broke up and why you cant get back together and why you need to move on which is almost always the best thing to do because the reason you broke up will probably just break you up all over again or be made worse by adding even more reasons why you both need to end it for good. basically, hate is just a way we humans use to cope with all the different emotions we feel while trying to find peace and hopefully one day being able to forgive each other and find happiness again.
2007-06-13 10:26:52 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay, i'm sorry but i think your a little out landish on what you said about having been married or dated them and then one day you decieded....
I was married prior to my now 3 yr marriage ( anniversary today yahoo me). I didn't just deciede one day to end it. It took me months to come to terms with even that thought. And it was so much more then just it's over. He was abusive to me. in all kinds of ways.
It wasn't i can't put up with the fact he hurt me, it was the idea that he could do that and still say he loved me.
Good moments are distroyed by the bad ones of mistrust and abuse.
When you've gone through that then you have the right to make that last comment. Untill then please dont trivialize divorce or broken relationships.
2007-06-13 10:12:12 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Generally it happens because the reason that the relationship ends is for something bad...like cheating, lying, stealing, etc..and that's a hard thing to just get over and be okay with all the fun times you had with each other. If things ended because they just didn't work out, there's not necessarily a rule that you "have" to hate each other...but sometimes it's just easier that way, so you can move on.
2007-06-13 10:09:47 · answer #3 · answered by Manhan32 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think it all happens when the break up occurs. The things that are said and done. You know some things can't be taken back and cut to the core and no matter how hard you try are just unforgivable. Sometimes the bad times outweigh the good times.
2007-06-13 10:19:25 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Usually breakups are not planned by both parties. When you think about it if you really loved somebody, You have shared very personal things, Sex, thoughts hopes and dreams. And then One person decides to move onto something else.So a heart gets broken, anger sets in ,and the games begin.. I agree with you it is stupid but it happens......
2007-06-13 10:15:38 · answer #5 · answered by John M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Usually because they're still sore from the breakup or they still harbor emotional feelings for their ex but can’t admit it because the person on the other end of the relationship broke it off. Breakups are a hard thing to go through though, so I’m sure there are a variety of reasons of why someone might dislike their ex.
I don't think it happens so suddenly either. One of them might start to slowly dislike the other, or their feelings of dislike might end up being neutral.
2007-06-13 10:11:35 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
My hate for my ex has come from the way he has treated me. I stood by him for 15 years through job after job, crisis after crisis, etc. He has treated me horribly since we seperated and I still don't understand what I did to deserve being treated like that. He is the one who has deserted me and our children. I get angry just thinking about his actions. It is very upsetting and not at all fair. I just hope karma gets him one day because he deserves it.
If he could have treated me and our kids with some respect I would have remained friends with him. After all we shared many many years and more importantly four children.
2007-06-13 10:12:38 · answer #7 · answered by mommyof4 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you have things a bit backwards. The "hating" probably comes before the separation, and is the cause of it. Nobody "decides" to hate someone. It's the result of interaction. People change, and one strong emotion (love) can easily turn to another (hate) when things do not go right.
2007-06-13 10:09:18 · answer #8 · answered by MOM KNOWS EVERYTHING 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Usually, if the relationship has ended, there are bad feelings somewhere. Often these feelings may dull over time, but remember, we're not eachother's exes b/c we were happy together!!! Clearly, there are going to be bad feelings.
2007-06-13 10:10:31 · answer #9 · answered by MsKitty 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No you can not keep it that way because then you will never move on. There is a thin line between love and hate.
2007-06-13 10:10:12 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋