He's so busy at work, plus we have a 2 year old and a 1 year old that take most of our energy. He just seems like he's never in the mood. Masterbating just doesn't do it for me, and I have a feeling he's just quickly taking care of himself if you know what I mean.
2007-06-13 00:31:46 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Mean! I'm not overweight!
By the way, I'm HOT...blond, beautiful face, 100 pounds...guys are always hitting on me and think I'm 19 and are very surprised I have two kids (15 months apart)!!!
2007-06-13 01:33:41 · update #1
Mean! I'm not overweight!
By the way, I'm HOT...blond, beautiful face, 100 pounds...guys are always hitting on me and think I'm 19 and are very surprised I have two kids (15 months apart)!!!
2007-06-13 01:38:56 · update #2
Oops, sorry. Guys can be so mean. I'm sure those responders are the ones that are overweight and can't get any action. Haha
2007-06-13 01:41:26 · update #3
Not an uncommon thing for this to happen.
It is difficult to deal with and I will try to give my ideas and comments.
Men do get involved in their work and try to provide with what they can do, therefore leaving the wife in a sexual unfulfilled state of mind.
Masturbation is just for ones self gratification. You want that spark back and totally understandable.
He may be "taking care" of himself and finds no time to make love to his wife. Just to tired or to stressed or whatever the case may be.
Suggestion...if money isn't a problem then perhaps try a weekend alone. Kids can go to Grandma's or something like that.
Someplace close that is within driving distance that niether of you have been. During the drive there tell him how you feel and just ask him.
Unfortunatley it may have become just a routine to him and you want to spice it up a little.
I have been married 17 years so let me give you an example...
My wife and I were having financial problems...I was working over 70 hours a week between 2 jobs. I just didn't have the energy and sex was not what I wanted.
She just told me that we are going away for a long weekend and that was the way it was. That Friday night she had on one of the seist things I had ever seen her wear. We had drank a bunch of wine. No need to go further there...you get the idea.
After that weekend our sex life turned around...it got so much better for her because she told me. I didn't realize what I had. Money is important but there is a reason a person tries to succeed in the work place and that is to provide. Therefore forgetting personal needs of the spouse.
It was great until my wife got bad female problems and she couldn't take me anymore.
I know...been there, done it.
2007-06-13 00:58:22 · answer #1 · answered by Magicman 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Despite everyone else's brainless ideas, you have a real problem here that needs fixing!! Yes, maybe you gained weight, maybe not. It doesn't matter what you look like, it's how you feel about yourslf and your man that's important. I would try spicing things up by suggesting sex in different places, using other fun "tools" in your lovemaking other than just your hands. BE SEXY. Meet him at the door wearing something you know he finds breathtaking (you naturally took the kids to a sitter, of course). Send him love notes through email or texting. Start out with what you want to do to him when he gets home, and go from there. Tell him how much you want him, and just watch his interest, er, "grow."
2007-06-13 00:44:18 · answer #2 · answered by MJESUSE 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That early-relationship laser-like focus on the sexual aspect of a relationship will, necessarily, end.
No one can keep up that kind of pace, and when one partner's desire to have sex dwindles too far below the other's, you can be assured that both partners are going to be dissatisfied.
You many never see the kind of "hours-long" and "dedicated-to-Her-pleasure" sex again. You can and should encourage him to do more than simply satisfy himself, but in the end you must accept the fact that no one, not even a spouse, is totally responsible for Your happiness.
Men are usually the partner seeking More sex, not less. It may not be fair, but I suspect that the changes having two kids has done to your body are a "turn-off" to your husband. Look at yourself honestly and assess if you need to work on your fitness. (I am NOT suggesting he might not also need to work on his body...)
Also, the simple fact of having kids in the next room can be a major buzzkill. Try a weekend vacation Alone, and see if he perks up a bit.
2007-06-13 00:49:12 · answer #3 · answered by chocolahoma 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try something different.
Put the kids to bed and share a bottle of wine hug and kiss but no sex.
Next day kids early to bed, a nice simple meal, wear something sexy or something that your husband likes and again touch, hold hands, kiss and fondle but no sex.
Maybe get a baby sitter and go watch a movie, some snogging in the car but no sex .
Keep this up for three or four days and see if it works.
It does with my husband.
2007-06-13 00:41:07 · answer #4 · answered by coolfluke 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make a date. If neither of you have much time set a time and place for a date. Tell him to wear his silk boxers (or whatever you like) and ask him what he would like you to wear. Have a blanket laid out with some soft music and some grapes or strawberries and go from there.
After this see if you can schedule your dates to the frequency you can both agree on, but let him pick the format for your 2nd date.
2007-06-13 03:52:00 · answer #5 · answered by Zaferus 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand how you feel. You need to let him know what you need. Also, your right, masturbation just doesn't cut it and why should you have to do that all of the time when you have a man right there that should WANT to fill your needs. As far as him "taking care of himself", that's okay, but when it takes place of his desire to be with you...it becomes a problem. I really suggest you talk to him and let him know exactly what you need and how you feel. Good luck and I hope you get some action soon!
2007-06-13 01:10:54 · answer #6 · answered by londa627 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I love the fact that people never figure out that despite the fact that everybody says it will and everybody admits that it does, nobody believes that after marriage and kids the sex will cut off to a quarter of what it was before at best. I have a friend who would never admit it to his wife but complains to us that she wants sex and he doesn't want to give it to her because when they got married and before the kid she was 120 pounds and after the kid she's 190 pounds. Is that your problem
2007-06-13 00:38:10 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to spice up your life and get him interested. One way to go about it in summer time is I get around the house in a shirt and a pair of sexy nickers with lace. Or you could go and buy a real nice lingerie outfit. Anyway have a think on it and see what ideas you come up with. Cheers and good luck.
2007-06-13 01:15:29 · answer #8 · answered by Live_For_Today 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
smarten yourself up. I'm sure after two kids you have let yourself go. Perhaps ask one of the Mom's at school back for a threesome.
2007-06-13 00:38:22 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
hi honey
how do you find the time anyway .tip; next time you fill like it.just whisper ;in his ear .that you are so wet down there .
if that doe.s not work .then he.s dead to you .
2007-06-13 01:01:38 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋