My husband let my 12 y/o niece take my 6 y/o daughter WHO DOES NOT KNOW HOW TO SWIM to the community pool while I was at work so he could do yard work. He said that he talked with a lifeguard he knew in school not that he was best friends with or even hung out with and he said he would keep an eye on her. Mind you the kiddie pool was closed, and the farthest she could go in the big pool was the steps because even the shallow end was over her head!! I asked him to go and get because I didn't feel comfortable and he said no! I called my mom to pick her up and she did. He was so pissed at me, he said I undermined his decision as a parent. HELP!!!
2007-06-12 17:45:42 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
You were right. I would've done the same thing and I would've got the same reaction!! Just dont talk about it as I am sure he wont make that call ever again!!!!!!
2007-06-12 17:50:27 · answer #1 · answered by karena k 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wonder if he would have been so angry if she drowned? This seems on the surface a frightening situation, but I wonder if you over reacted. If the 12yr and the lifeguard were watching her and she was sitting on the steps, then what was the harm? Your husband is mad because he didn't think things through and he was wrong. However your daughter is ok. Sit down with your husband and tell him that you and he are not single parents and that you need to work together. Your daughter cannot protect herself in a pool if she cannot swim. How about he be a good dad and teach her to swim or pay for lessons.
2007-06-12 18:16:57 · answer #2 · answered by tjnstlouismo 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He was definitely wrong. You're allowed to undermine his decision if it's affecting your child negatively. After all, she's your daughter too. Maybe the kiddie pool is reasonable, but the big pool totally isn't. Try to make him see that even with supervision, sh*t happens, and you only want the best care possible for your child. Your niece may have been adequate and things probably would've been ok, but why take that risk.
2007-06-12 17:55:20 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You were absolutely right in your decision. It would appear that the yardwork is more important that the safety of your daughter. Shame on your husband for pawning your child off on someone else. He totally shirked his responsibility. As for undermining his decision as a parent, it won't mean a hill of beans if you have no child to parent due to an immature decision like his. Stick to your guns, but don't participate in an argument.
2007-06-12 17:56:01 · answer #4 · answered by WhiteChocolate 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The safety of a child is more important than your husbands feelings in this case. He'll get over it. Treat him sweet for awhile, but don't apologize, you did no wrong. Us husbands are like kids sometimes and treat us the same, that being, let him make some decisions that you disagree with (and he knows you disagree with) that you can at lest live with. He'll get that man boost back a bit and all will be well.
2007-06-13 06:23:52 · answer #5 · answered by kadisciples 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think your husband is stupid at that moment. I could not believe that he allowed your child to be at that community pool without him. I believe it was a momentary lost of judgement. You were right to be mad at him and took some action about this. You did not undermined his decision about this. You just concern about the child safety. Am glad that some one able to pich up the child from that community pool.
2007-06-12 18:04:14 · answer #6 · answered by Sun Valley 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You did the right thing .As the parent in charge then he should have watched the 6 year old.He backed out on his role. Swimming pools are dangerous places.I would have thought the swimming centre has rules on the supervision of kids.Where we live the rules are quite strict about children and super vision.
2007-06-12 17:55:49 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of COURSE you undermined his decision as a parent! He made a TERRIBLE decision! It would have been so easy to have a horrible accident! How would he have felt then?
You need to have a serious talk about supervising that little girl in ways that will keep her safe. Suggest maybe he should take a parenting course.
2007-06-12 17:57:43 · answer #8 · answered by kiwi 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He put your child's life in danger, girlfriend. Stand your post and do not back down.
Doesn't matter what type of friend the lifeguard was.
Also, be sure to check what the pool policy on this. Doesn't sound to me if they should have been allowed in. but I could be wrong on that.
2007-06-12 17:50:47 · answer #9 · answered by dk 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋