i should start with an explanation. My boyfriend's mom lives in san diego, me and my boyfriend in cincinnati. His sisters (16&13 yrs old) came back a month last year to visit their dad. I"m extremely close with his sisters, they call everyday, and tell me everything about their lives.
Well, one day his oldest sister and i went dancing at a teen dance club, and we came back late, probably around 3.. and i stayed over their house because i didn't want to wake up my entire family. When i told my boyfriends mother this story she complained and said she had taught her daughters "not to sleep around" and i was a horrible example. Basically she called me a wh**e.
But, my boyfriend was already sleeping when we got home, and we had been together two years. I don't drink or smoke, or do any drugs.. and i'm 19, he's 21. Not what i consider a bad example
Was she right to say what she said to me? He won't talk to her now for what she said to me. Should i apologize or was she wrong?
2007-06-12 10:50:57 · 7 answers · asked by LoveisfirE 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
also, i work very hard to keep this woman pleased. I send her pictures of her son, and keep her updated what's going on with his life. I remind him to call her/ send her cards and gifts. All the rest of his family loves me... i have tried my hardest.. did i really screw up?
2007-06-12 10:52:40 · update #1
By the way, 3AM was totally okay with both parents, we called both and told them it would be a late night and asked if that was okay.
2007-06-12 11:20:26 · update #2
The mother was out of line.
She sounds like my dad (if that makes sense).
She sounds like the traditional, oldschool, I'm never wrong type of parent. If that's true, you can't win. Everything you do or say will never be good enough and you will always be scrutinized.
I wouldn't apologize, especially if you did nothing wrong. You can't please her even though you tried so hard because she can't be happy within herself.
You're dating her son, not her. As long as your boyfriend is on your side, that's all that matters...
2007-06-12 10:58:30 · answer #1 · answered by pxp608 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I think she over reacted to the whole situation. I know that she is trying to take care of alot of the situations that happen with her daughters and I can completely understand the good and bad examples but she took it to the next level. I've had my husband stay at my house before when we were dating and he slept on the couch and I in my room. As long as you are respectful to his family, she should be ok with it. Maybe there are other issues and she's taking them out on you. Keep your head up and hopefully things will take a turn for the better. Don't give her gifts as an apology for you doing something you thought was right in the first place. Ok Good Luck
2007-06-12 18:07:25 · answer #2 · answered by ediabullo 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your the one that made the mistake by keeping her daughter out passed curfew that I can understand but she had no right to say what she did. If you don't do drugs or anything I don't see how your a bad influence. I think you should prob apologize just to make things right even If you feel you have done nothing wrong Its better to make peace with this Lady rather than holding a grudge because who knows you and your b/f might get married one of these days and you wouldn't want her to hold this against you your whole life.
2007-06-12 18:12:48 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Its ok to party once in a while. You have to balance the partying you do with his sisters and the good examples. Spend equal or more time giving them a good example as partying (and his mother seems pretty rude by the way). I think if you sit down and tell his sisters "Don't drink or do drugs, have safe sex, don't get arrested" things like that, then you are ok, but if they only see you as "a free ticket to party" then you should probably check your morals.
2007-06-12 18:14:25 · answer #4 · answered by nylablover93 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just take the high road. It's hard to do, but at least things won't get worse. I don't think you did anything wrong, maybe she was having a bad night. Just leave things as they are for now and see what happens.
2007-06-12 18:34:06 · answer #5 · answered by bttrfly001 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
she was wrong but, since her girls were in a different state and one was out til 3am, i'm sure she was more than pissed. she just went overboard and misdirected her anger. i know i'd be more upset about the late night then you sleeping at the house. as long as you were in a different room than your b.f. she should let it go.
2007-06-12 17:56:48 · answer #6 · answered by racer 51 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
agree'd as long as you were in a different bedroom, but to make amends tell her, "I didn't mean to make you angry, I'm sorry and it won't happen again." "I really respect your opinion and I feel really bad, I didn't mean to dissapoint you, can you forgive me?"
Even though I don't think you "screwed" up.. but it will make life easier for you if you apologize.
That should clear things up... good luck
2007-06-12 18:02:37 · answer #7 · answered by Darren 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋