Baby being baptised, why do i have doubts?

Question

My husband was baptised c of e along with all his family, i haven't been baptised but my parents were mormons. I am not a member of any religion but im not atheist, i believe theres a god but i don't believe in the bible, i think as long as your a good person and use your common sense you'll be ok at the end,i don't like to complicate things.
My hubby and family want lil one baptised, its all booked up but the vicar said in years to come the church won't exist so maybe we should come to church to ensure its survival through our child.I have nothing against the church but i don't have a calling to go neither does my hubby and family. So im not as into her being baptised, i'll instill my values into her to be a good person and when she's older if she wants to join a church then thats her perogative.Everyones excited about the after party, i just feel a few doubts, its like were lying by going ahead with it. I told hubby but he feels like we have every right to get her baptised,opinions?

Answer 1

I do understand how you feel. It seems that church and church-things like christenings, baptisms, etc are just social events now.
There's no law that states that a kid must be baptised. My dad was a vicar but I was dedicated instead as my family do not believe in infant baptism. I chose to be baptised at age 14.
Could you come to a compromise with hubby and family? Speak to the vicar and see if there is a similar service without so much of the religious aspect - like a dedication or thanksgiving service.
It's pointless to do something you don't believe in just because its the socially expected thing to do. Have a party anyway, though!

Edit: I guess a lot of the replies are from americans. For their info, the Church of England is more a social group than a bible-based church. It may the official church in this country but it's not good for much.

Answer 2

The Bible says to "Repent and be baptized.An infant cannot repent.You might also want to have a look at Mark 16:16.

Please don't let people tell you that your baby will be lost if it isn't baptized.The Baptist himself gave testimony that Jesus is the "Lamb of God,which (taketh away the sin of the world)" John 1:29b. The sin of the world is original sin.Jesus put things back to original Adam before he sinned.He done this when He was baptized of John in the Jordan.When your child reaches the age of accountability they will be faced with the same choice that Adam had.If you want to do something wonderful for your child except Christ as your Lord and Saviour and set him an example that he can follow when the time comes.Baptizing children at such an early age often gives them a false security in their salvation.Many are not even aware that they need to be Born Again, John 3:1-.....

Answer 3

If you and your husband do not attend the Church of England, or any other church, why would you want to have your baby baptized? I wouldn't do it, if I was in your position.

It sounds as if the entire purpose of the baptism is for the party afterwards. If the family wants a party, then hold a party.

To me, a baptism is an affirmation of your belief in the church, and your desire to express that belief. To hold a baptism when there is no desire to attend, and no belief, to me, is a waste of time and effort.

I do not believe in infant baptism, because, as I have been taught, baptism is to wash away our sins. An infant has no capacity to sin, and therefore has no sins to wash away. Also, an infant as no understanding of what is happening, therefore cannot even participate in the ceremony.

If you husband attended weekly services, and worshipped with his church regularly, then I would say to go ahead with the baptism, even if you do not believe in it. But, since he doesn't attend, and doesn't have any belief, then I think it should not happen.

I hope that you and your husband are able to reach an agreement.

Answer 4

As a Bible believeing Christian I believe it is good to get babies Blessed but not baptised as they have to make choices in later life as do you!
Can I suggest that you need some insight into what baptism but more importantly..Christianity is all about. There will be an Alpha Course running at a Church near you and you should attend for your own education in the truth of the Gospels. I will give you the website and can only ask that you think of attending for your benefit..........Please believe me...we are in what the Bible describes as the 'End Times' and the need to understand that is paramount in our lives.
The Course in non-denominational and very easy going in style. You would have the freewill to drop out at any time...but please...please go on it and learn the truth as Christians see it. http://www.alpha.org
In the Love of the Lord..... Best wishes, Mike.

Answer 5

A baptism is not something that ought to take place in a vacuum: if you have no intention of raising your child within the Christian family of the Church then you really need to question why you are asking the Church to perform the baptism.

One or two respondents have argued that a baby is incapable of sin. I'm not at all sure that this is the case! The essence of sin is to be self-centred rather than God-centred - and a baby, if you think about it, is the most self-centred creature on this planet! A baby's whole world revolves around that baby's needs - and that doesn't change until he or she learns to trust those who care for him or her. (There's a lesson there too about our need for a growing relationship with God!)

One or two others have talked about 'letting the growing child make their own mind up later on,' or 'not imposing your own beliefs on them.' This makes no sense. Parents inevitably impress their own belief-system, whatever it is, upon their children simply because it's there every day of their growing up. In time the children will quite naturally react for or against it. And throughout their children's growing, parents are making decisions for them all the time, frequently in accordance with the law of the land, and frequently in the teeth of opposition from the children themselves: e.g. Go to bed, now! Get up, now! Wash behind your ears! and Because you've GOT to to go to school! If parents have a particular belief-system which they believe to be beneficial, why should they not bring their children up in that same faith?

Answer 6

It seems to me that you need to find out what you really believe before having your child baptised. If you believe in God but not in the Bible then why get baptised? If you do believe in God, is He worthy of being praised? Is He in charge of your life? Should you go to church and see if maybe you do believe in something? I think that you need to find a church, go and learn more about God and then decide whether to get baptised or have your child baptised. If God is not worth your time on Earth, then He may not have time for you in Heaven. Church is a good place to learn morals and it gives your child a reason to have good morals. Maybe you could find a nice non-denominational church that you both could agree on. Ask questions and learn all that you can. It will be well worth your time.

Don't have your child baptised just to have an after-party. That is not what it is about.

Answer 7

Every right to get her baptized? The head of the house will not conduct his home in a Christian manner, he's already unequally yoked -- and listening to you. You won't bring the kid to church for any Christian education, she won't learn anything about the faith, won't get the opportunity to worship her Creator, it would be irresponsible for a pastor to baptize your child. Ensuring the church's survival? Wow, what an answer. Your husband's church needs to see your question, so they can all pray for your child, you, your husband, and most definitely a pastor that only sees baptism as a membership drive. That can't be what the vicar said.

Answer 8

I understand why parents want their children baptised, its just about the only traditional right of passage for young children we have. If you don't believe, you can't promise at the alter to bring the child up as part of the christian faith etc.
My opinion is you should just throw a party for your baby where all your friends and family can come and have a nice time i place of the baptism

Answer 9

It won't do her any harm, but you are on the right tracks when you say you will let her make her own mind up when she's old enough. She will not automatically be a christian just because she got baptised now, it will still be a choice she must make later. If it will cause a lot of trouble to cancel it, I'd go ahead, it won't hurt.

Answer 10

Go with your gut. I'm kind of like you. I'm agnostic (not an atheist.. I do think there MAY be a god or something but am not sure) and I used to be Catholic for many years. My husband used to be a Christian too but he's now agnostic as well.

My parents wanted us to baptize our kids but I just wound up saying "no" in the end. It's not something I believe in. While no real harm would come out of it if I did baptize them, the idea of it gave me the heebie-jeebies and I just felt like if I did it, it was only to make my parents and her family happy. So I didn't and I'm glad I didn't.

Do what feels best to you, not because people are pressuring you.