What is your opinion on getting my tubes tied?

Question

I am 21 and I am pregnant with my second child, I want to get my tubes tied after this one. The reason I want to do this is because me and my husband want to adopt sometime in the future after our children are older and we are more stable to raise children with special needs. I think it is pointless to continue to overpopulate the world when there are so many children that need parents as it is.
I am just worried about what my doctor is going to say. Even though I feel that it shouldn't be his decision. But he does have the last say.
So what do you think about this?

Answer 1

in my city/state you would not be old enough. here you must be 25 w/ 3 children or 28 to get it done

Answer 2

I am 25 yrs. old. and I just had my tubes tied. I just had my second daughter a lil over 4 months ago. When I was 22, I wanted to have my tubes tied because I didn't want anymore children due to problems with my marriage. We were military at the time and I was advised not to have it do because "I might change my mind". I was also told that the doctor wouldnt do it because I was not 23 and I had not be pregnant 3 times or had 3 or more children. I didn't want to bring another child into this world, so they wouldn't have to be put into the bad siuation of a marriage I was in like my daughter was...I had an IUD put in...It was the one for 5 yrs.. For 3 months I had severe cramps!! I was at the hospital every week. I had to have it removed. Only after I had it removed did my mother AND my grandmother tell me they had one and had an infection. And I have heard that story many times more since then. Why did I tell you all this>>Because I have done what you are asking, and have done whats been suggested for you to do. My answer to you...The doctor might not let you get it done..because you are as young as you are. And I do understand your statement and idea for the adoption!! Now the IUD, that might not be a smart idea. Ask your doctor how many women get infections from it..and will you have any continous cramping. You will be told that you will have cramping that day it is put in. Now with my long statement(sorry),I hope I've answered your question......

Answer 3

First, your doctor does NOT have the last say. If he thinks he does, you need to find a new doctor.

Having your tubes tied is a dramatic move that will, for all practical purposes, be permanent. Being pregnant with your second child at 21 indicates that you are not overly compulsive (at least not about this) and you seem to have thought this out.

How your husband feels about it is far more important than how your doctor feels. Is he in agreement with your plan? If so, your idea of having your tubes tied doesn't sound like a crazy idea. Two children, in this world, with the cost of raising kids, is just fine.

If your husband is not in agreement, you need to talk it out and try to come to an agreement. There is always the option of his taking steps to prevent another pregnancy.

Whatever you do, don't do this without your husbands knowledge. It will come out eventually and it could seriously damage the trust that should exist between husbands and wives.

Answer 4

I am 42 yrs old, I have been married for 16 yrs. (8/18/08). I made the decision after my son was born 11 yrs. ago to have my tubes tied, because it was a known fact that I didn't want anymore children. I am the mother of 3 living children (2 miscarriages, 1 abortion). I felt like after putting my body through all that it was time (6 pregnancies). My husband supported me with my decision. The female body goes through a lot after childbirth. You are the only one that can make that decision, as for his family they are not the ones that would have to take care of these children now or later. If your not sure about the health risk, get a second opinion. Good Luck on making the right decision that is best for you.

Answer 5

You are sooooooo young. I would recommend you get an IUD. I have one called Mirena and it lasts for five years. Researched it a lot before I got it because I didn't want to put something in my body that would cause me issues. I was considering the same thing. I am 25 and have 3 kids and don't know if I want any more. But here's my thought process... I am young and who knows how I will feel about things in 5 or even 10 years. Having my tubes tied is permanent so God forbid I change my mind... that would just break my heart. Mirena had a very high pregnancy prevention rate and I don't have to fuss with it for five years. That way if I dont want to have any more kids I can just get a new one put in but if I do then I can have it removed at any time and get pregnant. And the best part is no surgery required. I now I have changed they way I think since I was your age and I believe I will continue to change a lot though out my life. Please please don't do a permanent birth control! Please check out this mirena I am telling you about before you finalize your decision...

Answer 6

I do think you are a smidge young to get your tubes tied, and making the decision to end your fertility while you are pregnant is usually a bad decision. I know my close friend got her tubes tied at the delivery of her second and she is now regretting that rash decision (although she swore up, down and sideways that she felt "done").
Speaking from experience, waiting a year or two to let those feelings solidify, can really be a good idea. However, if you are sure you want it done, they should not be allowed to deny you access to the birth control of your choice. Just be forewarned - a tubal reversal does not have great rates of success. (And is quite expensive!) As well, you have heavier periods, and many of my friends report a lot of ovulatory pain/discomfort as the body re-absorbs the unused egg.

I wish you all the best. Good luck with your decision!

Answer 7

I don't think its a bad idea I'm 23 with 3 kids and have mine tied. When you first go to the doctor, their going to keep asking you over and over and over and over again if your sure that you want to do it, they might even try to stall but just let them know know that its your decision and your 100% sure. It took me a year to finally get mine done and even at the hospital right before the procedure, I got asked if I was sure a million more times!! I don't know how it works where you're at, but since your preganant now get your papers signed bacause I was told that they had to be 30 days old, so then right after you have your baby they can do it while your still in the hospital and you'll have no worries once you leave.

Answer 8

What do I think about this? I think it's absolutely ridiculous that a woman can't decide when SHE wants to have HER tubes tied...that she has to meet guidelines as to how many kids she already has, how old she is, etc., when the same woman, if she were 16 weeks pregnant, could walk into her local abortion clinic and have an abortion, and nobody would bat an eyelash!!! To use the same excuse/reason, "It's a woman's body and nobody should be allowed to tell her what to do with it."

Sorry 'bout that. To actually answer your question, I'd tell him just exactly what you told us. Your plan sounds wonderful to me, and I don't know why he'd say no to you. If he does, then find a new ob/gyn.

Good luck!

Answer 9

i completely agree that there is no reason to overpopulate the world when there are so many children that need homes. i also want to get my tubes tied after my 2nd child and hope the doctor is ok with it. i'm only 22 now and i have a feeling the doc will say i'm too young.

we'll see. good luck to you.

Answer 10

Your still very young, i wouldn't do this just in case 10 years from you now you change your mind. i think it's a wonderful idea that you guys would consider adopting in the future but what if that don't work out with your two kids????? Meaning sometimes foster chidren come with issues not all but let's just say you adopt one that brings harm to your family and after you clear the mess up choose not to adopt again, but would still like to expand your family? then you would have erased the possibility cause your tubes are tied. Even though they can be reversed the outcome isn't effected. Your not overpopulating the world if two people who are in love and MARRIED decide to bring forth life. Overpopulating is the ones whom have baby after baby and don't care after them. like the men whom have several babies 7or 8 don't see the kid or have no intention on being with that woman. or the woman whom have baby after baby to keep a man. your situation is totally different i wouldn't tie my tubes yet, just get on birth control you can still have the fun of playing but not getting caught. Just in case you change you mind about adoption or for whatever reason it don't work out you still can do what you want. Good luck

Answer 11

I had my tubes tied at the age of 19 after having 3 kids. It is state to state. My doctor had no arguments when I asked.