My cousin sent me an invitation addressed to me and only me. The RSVP card does not have a place for a guest to be added. Can I still bring a date?
Its far away and a cash bar and if I can't bring a date or get drunk I might as well not go! LOL
2007-06-12 06:07:37 · 24 answers · asked by Stace_01 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
I was kidding about getting drunk people....what I don't understand is why people would not let the single people bring a date? Who am I supposed to dance with? Aren't weddings supposed to be about having fun and celebrating?
2007-06-12 06:44:35 · update #1
I am not single...I am not married. I have a new boyfriend that I would like to bring.
2007-06-12 09:23:21 · update #2
Normally no because that means they have to spend more money on food, and more room in the hall etc...
But since its your cousin, just phone up and ask them. Im sure they wont mind since your family.
2007-06-12 06:13:40 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 7⤊ 0⤋
If you are super-close to your cousin, you may want to just ask. If you do not feel comfortable doing that because you two are not very close, then take it for what it is: if only you were invited, you do not bring a guest. A lot of couples only invite people that are close to them to avoid the added cost of meals and drinks for people they do not even know. Maybe you could find out from someone else that is going if you know any other people that will be there. You can plan to go with them or meet up with them when you get there. Also, a wedding is a time to celebrate the couple and the meaning of marriage...and if you only want to go to dance and drink, maybe you could RSVP that you're unable to attend.
2007-06-12 08:39:14
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answer #2
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answered by jen 3
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You were invited to share the experience of your cousin's wedding.
You, not you and some stranger they've never even heard of.
If you want to attend, say Yes.
If you don't want to be there to share your cousin's day, decline the invitation.
You're making a mistake in not going, though.
Weddings are a great place to meet guys.
Edit, in answer to your Additionals.
The point of having a public celebration of a wedding is to have family and friends with one on this important day -- NOT to share it with a bunch of people neither in the couple know.
You will NOT be the only unmarried person there, since the couple didn't put "And bring a total stranger along" on the invitation.
There will be a LOT of men to dance with.
If you don't like anyone in your family, and you know you won't like anyone that they know, then you might not have any fun.
Thing is, you do know some of the people there; if there are any you like, you will get to see them.
And you don't know everyone else there, so you might meet new people that you like.
Weddings are fun; people are there to have a good time.
Most do.
Unless the spend the whole time sulking.
2007-06-12 07:49:35 · answer #3 · answered by tehabwa 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Call as soon as you get the card and thank them for inviting you first. Then in the conversation say "I just needed to make it clear, I understand how expensive things get and how important it is for you to have a accurate head count. Is my invitation for me and a guest? If not I understand, I just want to know before I make arrangements."
It is nice and very honest and she can decide what she would like to do. In my opinion if she does say just you then you still need to be gracious because weddings are so very expensive you never know what the reasoning is and it could have been a financial decision.
And by the way I got your joke right off - seems like people can't take even the smallest of jokes on here! Seesch people do you REALLY think she is a big old embarrassing drunk if she was so kind as to concern herself with proper invitation etiquette! Lighten up for crying out loud!
2007-06-12 06:58:57 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
When in doubt, ask. Never bring a "friend" to a wedding unless that person is also invited. If you ask, the family of the bride may agree that you can bring a guest.
One should never go to a wedding reception with the express intention of getting drunk. That is not proper. I don't care if it is a "cash bar", an "open bar", or a German wedding where they bring in several kegs of beer. It is offensive to the family of the bride and other wedding guests if you get drunk at the reception.
2007-06-12 06:28:08 · answer #5 · answered by Mark 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. Your cousin probably invited all of the people s/he could afford to invite. If no guest was invited, then no guest is expected. And don't call to get permission either. I know when I got married, the only single people I invited with a guest were those who were either engaged, or had been dating someone seriously for a long time before my wedding. I have a huge family, my husband has a lot of friends and my parents (who paid for the wedding) could only afford to invite 200 guests. All my single friends & relations who were rude enough to call to ask me to make an exception for them did was either make me feel bad, or piss me off.
2007-06-12 06:35:38 · answer #6 · answered by wendy08010 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, do NOT bring a date unless you call your cousin and ask. Many weddings are on a very tight budget and extra guests are a royal (and expensive) pain.
And I'm sorry if you think this is mean, but the fact that you're considering not going to a wedding if you can't get drunk there is completely tacky.
2007-06-12 06:20:11 · answer #7 · answered by Delicious Pear 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have to say no because once someone brought two people I had not invited and I was insulted. They would have brought two others as well, but they decided not to come. If you really want to bring a date then you should call this person up and say, "Hey, I'd really like to bring someone with me! Is it okay?" Make sure you ASK, not say, "Heads up! I just wanted you to know I'm bringing a date." In all likelihood, they should say yes. Letting them know AHEAD of time would be beneficial to them so they'll be able to get an accurate head count so they'll have enough food and drinks and stuff.
2007-06-12 07:08:03 · answer #8 · answered by Lou Lou 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The wedding is to celebrate the couple's union. Some people can't afford to invite you AND a guest. It's not the best etiquette, but they still do it. It's also in poor taste for you to bring a date anyway.
2007-06-12 06:47:45 · answer #9 · answered by Apple21 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry- that invite basically says "one only please"
Personally I wouldn't even call the cousin, because she's probably put in a lot of time trying to figure out the guest list and that might just put her on the spot- If you really don't want to go, and don't think you'll have a good time, or it's too far away, and would be expensive to get there- then don't go
2007-06-12 06:30:59 · answer #10 · answered by ♥♥justme♥♥ 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If there isn't room for a guest, your date isn't invited. Receptions are expensive. Parents tend to insist on conservative lists.
You might still be able to drink, however. Though it it probably not acceptable to call and ask her to allow you to bring one more person, I don't think it would be a problem to ask her if she knows anyone coming from your neck of the woods who could give you a lift there and home? And splitting the gas with someone might just give you an extra hundred bucks for that cash bar. (with gas being priced as it is today)!
2007-06-12 06:15:19 · answer #11 · answered by Cindy H 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋