People always think that i look so young, it gets frustrating?

Question

i am twenty years old, and when some people look at me they think that i am as young as twelve. i get criticized often for this. i work in retail, but there are times when people dont want my help because they want help from someone who is "older". i dont think that i look that young, but its frustrating to have things like this happen sometimes. any advice?

one of the things I see here is "dress (or act, talk) more sophisticatedly". I will have you know that i do not dress youngly or scantily in my work, really not in general, so this is not the issue. I dress in business casual wear. when I speak, I am not usually taken much more seriously, because people think that I am just more mature for whatever age they take me for, not the other way around, of proving to them that I am older
I understand I have to deal with it, but what I really want is for people to start to understand and judge less. The saying "don't judge a book by its cover" applies to the age people appear as well as any other factors.

i have two favorite answers here: Angela and Lou Lou
I am glad you both understand how I feel.
Angela: I am glad to find someone else who understands how it impacts work, people say "love it for when you're older", but if it is affecting my ability to assist people...my job.... then how can I not be upset sometimes at what people say to me?
and a note for Lou Lou: I have dealt with people thinking that I, too, have an eating disorder for many years, I am twenty now and it is since I was about 12. I am 5'1" and only weigh about 90 pounds. I am the size my body wants me to be, I dont look sickly or anything, but even teachers in school would accuse me of not eating properly, or having an eating disorder.
and thank you to the rest of the people on here who gave their feedback.

Answer 1

I'm 21 and I get strange looks from people who see that I'm driving! I too have had customers ask for an older cashier. It drives me crazy. The people who say "you'll appreciate it later" obviously don't realize how hurtful and frustrating it is to be belittled for something you have no control over.

Answer 2

I know how this feels. Virtually all older people will tell you to just deal with it, and that you will love it when you're older. But that's a long time off. You're young now, and people still think you're a kid, and they still want to treat you that way, and it's annoying.

I'm 25 now, and I think I look pretty young for my age. People don't comment on it as much as they used to, but when I look at myself, and then look at other guys my age, I realize that I still look younger than I really am. When I was in high school, I hated it. During my first week of ninth grade, a senior came up to me and asked me if I was sure that I was at the right school. When I was a senior in high school myself, I would literally see people's jaws drop when they learned how old I was and what grade I was in.

Oddly enough, people these days don't seem to notice much. I sometimes buy cigars and cigarettes, and I rarely ever get carded. One time, the woman asked for my birthdate, and I just showed her my ID. I still get ready to show it every time I buy something that has an age limit.

I realize this is just rambling, and probably doesn't help you much. Like someone else said, I'm not sure that there's any advice that's really good in that it helps you with the problem. I guess it's just one of those things that we don't have much control over.

Answer 3

I get this all the time, and I'm a year older than you. I'm small for my age and thin so not only do I get carded and surprised expressions when I whip out my ID, I get asked if I have an eating disorder as well. It's very hurtful. Once I was at a friend's high school birthday party and a college guy asked if I was one of the birthday girl's little sister's friends. I was so upset. I've been dealing with it since high schooll and there really is nothing you can do that you're not already doing to fix it. You say you aren't dressing young or acting young. It sucks, but sometimes you do just have to deal with it because there's nothing you can do to make them stop. You can't grow taller or look older than you are. People tend to underestimate me because of how I look. I try to look at this from an advantageous angle. Think of all the people you'll surprise when they find out you are older and wiser than you look!

Answer 4

I don't really have any GOOD advice other than "get used to it."

I'm 32 and I got carded for a freakin' rated-R movie the other day. That means the guy thought I was under 17.

I also had a store clerk tell me once that "if I was going to have a fake ID it should be more realistic." It was my real driver's lisence!

The only thing I can say is that I don't mind as much as I used to. I suppose when I'm 70 I'll enjoy having everyone think I'm 50.

Good Luck!

Answer 5

At twenty it is frustrating but you will appreciate it later. I am 35 and have been yelled at to get to class when visiting my daughters high school. I am carded for beer, cigerettes and even to play bingo. When I was 18-23 I hated looking younger than my age, I could often pass for young teen back then and it drove me mad. I have found that as I have got older and don't look 35 but look like I am in my 20's I am thrilled. So when those ignorant individuals don't want help from someone who looks young, pass them off to the next person letting them know, that at 20 years old you could use that extra break.

Answer 6

i'm virtually a similar age as you and that i'm getting carded for R rated video clips, cigarettes and of direction for any form of alcohol...get used to it! it extremely is a compliment!!! besides any lady you meet at a bar is ninety 9% likely to no longer be a good guy or woman thus far, there are uncommon circumstances! you will like being a toddler face once you're 30 and all your human beings seem plenty older than you! then you extremely will extremely be pickin up the chicks!

Answer 7

when i was 25 i was pulled over for no reason and the cop asked, " are you old enough to have a license young man?" . i'm a girl!
i am now 39 and get 'hit on' by 18 year olds.
no one has EVER taken me seriously. sorry, it won't get much better, but you'll learn to love it. just look at it from a different angle. when you go to your 20 year high school reunion you'll look better than everyone - even better than the guy's 'eye candy' girlfriends. lol.

my mom got carded for her AARP discount - last week. she's 72 today!

Answer 8

Join the club dude. I'm almost 30 and people still think I'm 16. I have been asked for my ID on numerous occasions. last month i went to watch the movie 300 and i was asked for my id (just to make sure) its annoying at times especially with the ladies my age They aren't interested in me cos they think I'm some horny teenage kid and to make matters worse teenage girls hit on me a lot(I suppose i should be flattered ). But you should look on the bright side of it. It means you have very good genes and that you will look good to girls a lot longer than most guys.

Answer 9

When I was younger I used to get proofed well into my 20's
and I used to get so upset. I wanted to look older. (Stupid me) Boy do I miss those days !! I know it's hard not getting the respect you deserve, but enjoy it while it lasts. You'll be old before you know it! Just act like a mature adult and maybe they will see around your youthful appearance.

Answer 10

*laughs* at least it's not the other way around. I'm 17 years old and people always mistake me for being in my mid to late twenties. one teacher at a middle school where i worked at mistaked me first for a student and yelled at me for being in the hall during classtime and then when she looked closer and realized i wasn't that young appologized and said "oh i'm sorry, you must be a parent. what classroom is your child in?" so yeah. it's frustrating either way isn't it?