2yr. old tantrums? at home.?

Question

im going crazy im about to lock myself in my room an let her cry it out rolling on the ground in the livingroom. She seems to cry and whine all day on and off for what? i don't understand what she's wanting. i feel horrible as a mother im about to buy earplugs. when she does this she seems so unhappy and it makes me feel sad, that she's crying this way? any advice on how to handle this? i try to keep my cool, but i have spanked her bottom for continueing to cry and raised my voice to her.i guess i need some parenting skills??

Answer 1

Ok, just to be safe (and I know this sounds extreme), take her to the doctor to make sure she isn't in any type of pain. The doc will check for teething and such. Is she constipated? That can often cause pain as well.

Once you have racked your brain and ruled out every possible issue that might be a legitimate reason to cry, keep on doing what you are doing.

I know it is difficult sweetheart. Believe me, I KNOW it is difficult. I have a two and a half year old who is pulling this mess now. She is my second child though and her brother made her tantrums look like a gentle ballet routine.

i just read the response above, "use your words sweetie..." hehe. Hard to reason with a two year old, much less one who can't hear you over their own screaming, but it does sound nice, doesn't it? Lol. I wouldn't spank though, that doesn't do anything during a tantrum but elevate it. Same thing with raising your voice. I know this is going to sound awful, but I read once that you could use a water gun to get their attention during these and it actually worked for me. My son hated water in his face and when he would start, I would take a teeny tiny water gun and shoot his forehead. You can do this is you really feel you need to get their attention, but after much experience in this department, I honestly think the best thing to do is just ignore them. I know it is AGONIZING, but their tantrums will eventually get shorter and shorter and soon they will learn it is a useless effort. Just remove yourself from the situation as best you can and avoid turning into screaming/angry mommy, that just terrifies a kid and makes you feel awful afterwards.

Oh, and PLEASE do not try the strapping her in method. This is the equivalent of a straightjacket and only panics them! I tried strapping my son into his car seat (brought it in the house) one time and the look on his face made me get him right back out. I swear, this will give you more mommy guilt than you can handle. I just think it is a horrible thing, like handcuffing a kid only worse. You'll see what I mean.

She will get through this. Like an old college professor used to say "hang a wreath on your door, this too shall pass."

In the meantime, after the little cherub/demon goes to bed, I suggest a margarita as reward for your being a good girl all day!

Answer 2

Yes, I would definetely see what is causing the tantrum first. It may be that she just doesn't have the speech skills yet to tell you what she needs.

But at this age is when they start to push the boundaries and see how much they can get away with. This is when you have to be serious about following through when you tell her not to do something. This will help..
1. Get down on her level and look her in the eyes. CALMLY tell her that you love her and she is a good girl, but she is not to whine or scream anymore, but talk in a 'nice' voice when she wants something.
2. Tell her if she throws another tantrum, you will spank her. Never spank in anger (this teaches them to lash out when they're mad)
3. When she does scream again (and she will) make sure you follow through. When she realizes that every time she does, the same thing will happen no matter what, she will start to calm down. Be consistent! You can't spank her one time and just say "oh, quit" the next time. She needs the security of being able to predict what will happen when she chooses a bad behavior, and that there are consequences for actions. Good luck, don't give up!~

Answer 3

She is two and they call it the terrible two's for a reason. It's really like a test for the parents to see if they can maintain sanity through the two's. Is she getting enough sleep at night? During the day. They also seem to start cutting their molars around this age and that seems to be pretty painful for them. Instead of spanking try giving her a time out or taking something away from her that she really likes. Only if you are certain nothing is wrong. Usually it seems to me that if they are crying there is usually a reason.

Answer 4

You need to gain control over the situation. If she is allowed to act like this at home she will do this in stores, restaurants, etc. When she starts to throw a tantrum firmly, but gently grip her arms and look her in the eyes and tell her in a stern voice "STOP NOW" If she doesn't you place her in a booster chair with a belt on it and strap her in until she calms down. I have only had to do this with my almost 3 year-old son a couple of times. Let her sit there for 2 minutes. After that tell her that she has to sit in the naughty chair if she acts up.

Answer 5

My son is about to be 3 next month he still does a little bit of it but not much. I started early on cutting that out cause I'm not having it anywhere we go. First don't yell at her epically from your height you need to get on her level and talk to her and tell her she doesn't need to do this to get your attention. You can tell her that pretty or big girls don't throw fits like that use examples. If that doesn't work i would try a time out place and still talk to her and tell her why she is in the naughty place. Communication is the key!

Answer 6

She has learned how to push your buttons to make you give in, and that's normal with kids. When she starts throwing a fit ignore her, just say when your done throwing your hissy let me know walk away, she will soon learn your will not buy into this anymore.

Answer 7

She's 2 years old. Deal with it. Raising your voice will only make her sthink you are on the same level of immaturity as she is. Instill discipline.

Answer 8

you need to figure out why this is happening. Is she getting enough sleep at night or any naps during the day? Teething? Sick? When does it start? Are there times she doesn't do it?

Answer 9

First quit the spanking. And work on skills such as "use your words" then use words she could use. Teaches her vocabulary along with social skills.