how young is too young?

Question

I am 54. I recently found myself attracted to the 23 year old intern at my job. I can tell she likes me because she laughs at my jobs and is nice to me. I know from her facebook that she is single so I am thinking of asking her out on a date.I know she will say yes, but i am worried about what the general public wil think.

Answer 1

You don't need to worry about what other people think! C'mon, you're old enough to know better! As long as she's mature enough for your taste, go for it!

Answer 2

Don't worry about the general public. If you and she are comfortable with each other that's what matters.

Be careful, though, about any relationship in the workplace. You can get into a lot of trouble depending on who you work for and how they view such relationships, and that would be true if you were both 23.

The possibilities of a relationship between a 54-year-old and a 23-year-old working out long term are not great. She is still growing her personality, and her tastes and interests could change greatly in the next few years. On the other hand you are at a very stable point in your life.

Still, a date might be okay, just make sure it doesn't cause you problems at work.

Answer 3

I would reconsider and reconsider asking her on a date. Have you thought of what it would be like to date someone that could be around your daughter's age (if you have a daughter, that is)? Also, have you considered how tense it would be at work if the dating didn't pan out or if she said "no" to dating you? Do you think she'd still laugh at your jobs and be nice to you?

My position is that the majority of the general public would not be impressed with your decision to date a 23 years old and that it would probably affect your friends' and family's relationship with you. And what about her friends and family, especially her parents?

So, to me, 23 is too young to your 54 as it's more than double your age.
Annette

Answer 4

Don't destroy this young girl's life. She is not old enough to realize that when you are 70, she will only be 39 years old. She will still have plenty of life in her, and you will be ready to kick back and relax. Neither of you will be happy, unless you are rich, and can accept that she will be looking at those younger men wondering what she could have done. I have seen it so many times. The girl eventually ends up cheating, and leaving the older man. You will have taken all of those fun years away from her. Years that she could have met someone her own age and started a family.

You are too old to be having children. You would not have the energy to be a good father for the next 18 or more years. Why would you take that opportunity away from a young girl?

Answer 5

I have heard a formula for working this out in the Middle East (for guys). Half your age plus seven. At 54, this would make a 34 year old ideal. That said, it is a formula to work out the ideal age for a wife.

No matter her age, dating people you work directly with is always dodgy. Imagine the 'harassment case' if she's not keen and you've misread the mood/signals.

Wait till she leaves the job, then go for it.

Are you sure you aren't just thinking with your little head though?

Answer 6

you know what? just do what you want! you're old enough to stop caring about what everyone else is going to think of you. it's your life, your decision, do what you want.

on the other hand, just because she laughs at your jokes and is nice to you doesn't mean she has a thing for you. you're old enough to be her father (no offense). she's a young woman and is still enjoying her freedom. if you're an attractive, established man, then yes, its possible she is attracted to you in a physical way. but just because she's nice isn't enough to say she wants to go out with you.

just go for it. the worst she could say is no, but at your age i'm sure you've been rejected before. just remember if things don't work out you have to work w/ this woman on a daily basis, so i wouldn't get too serious unless you knwo for a fact it will work out.

good luck

Answer 7

The general public will either think you are a lucky guy, or that you're a dirty old man, depending on their disposition. So you can't base it on that. But I think the average 23 yr old is probably into things that you wouldn't find fun anymore. Do you want to hold your girlfriend's legs up for a kegstand and then hold her hair while she pukes? Do you want to hear why Lindsey Lohan is soooooo much prettier than Paris Hilton? If that sounds like fun to you, then go for it.

Answer 8

If she likes you back then you shouldn't worry about what others think.

However, I believe you should talk with her about it first. Casually ask her what she thinks of "age differences". Get to know her slowly first rather than jumping right in. Find out her interests, goals, etc. What brought her to your place of employment? Things like that...

I'm a woman who laughs at jokes easily, and can joke back with the best of them. I didn't think this was "flirting" because I tend to get along well with guys. However, at one of my summer positions while a student, I was accused of being a flirt. :-| Seriously, I didn't even think it was flirting.

Answer 9

It none of the general public's business! It is somewhat of a large age difference for the two of you to hit it off well. If you do and you are happy together, that is all that matters.

Answer 10

There are celebrities who date girls so much younger than them. Why should you care what the public thinks.Unless you are afraid of rejection, go ahead and ask her out. But I would suggest you find out if she likes you as a friend or a bit more. If all does not go well, then just forget about it.

Answer 11

K, I'm 22 but here's my two cents as honestly as I can put it (excuse and language but)

F*ck what the rest of the world thinks, All that should matter is your and her happiness, if you like the girl and she likes you go for it and just raise your middle finger high to the people who say it's wrong.