Someone I know, in their 30's, let her son have a sleepover for 11th birthday. Were about 5 boys altogether, watching movies and talking. The mother was in the house with them the whole time. She told them several times to get things quieter but told the boys they could stay up as long as they wanted. Three of the boys tired out and went to sleep at 2AM. Her son and the last boy went to sleep at 5 AM.
Her husband is away at school temporarily. He undemines her parenting skills anyway. He's never had any children and the 11 yr. old is my friend's only child. The other thing, they've only been married about 3 years. The husband told her the child shouldn't be allowed to stay up that late, that she is not a good parent, and she needs parenting classes. He also said before, the boy should be in bed by10 on Fri./Sat.-when there's no school. I've noticed the child is pampered(spoiled). I told her I would not give her a reply but put the question here and show her the results.
2007-06-11 11:17:17 · 6 answers · asked by kriend 7 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
i think it was okay that they stayed up late...I am sure she is a good mum...my sister daoed the same thing and her kids are very well behaved...
2007-06-11 22:53:03 · answer #1 · answered by Lefty 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is her husband and he should be supporting her. If he isn't supporting her they should talk over the lack of support and if that doesn't solve the problem then seek couples counseling.
Calling her a bad parent is horrible. There is nothing worse for a mother to be called when she is trying her best to raise her child with love.
Staying up late for a special occasion is okay by my book, but 11 year old children still need more sleep than adults because they are still growing. 10:30 could be a compromise bedtime for the weekends. He'll have plenty of time to stay up late on a regular basis when he's older.
2007-06-11 14:11:13 · answer #2 · answered by Breeder 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmmm...her husband sounds like an a**. He has no right to be calling her a bad mother! I would be really mad if my hubby did that (when we met I had a son already and he had no kids and he loved my son like his own and never questioned my judgement). My son is now 13 and I have let him have the same kind of sleepovers for special occasions and there is NO harm in it! He has stayed up all night as well and although he was tired the next day...he had a GREAT time with his mates and there certainly aren't any after effects (he didn't become a serial killer or something because I let him stay up all night a couple of times!). I think letting your kids do this is showing them you love them and want them to have a good time....too bad what time they go to bed!
If he was my husband I would tell him to....well I would swear a lot! He sounds like a control freak.
Tell your friend she is a good mother by the sounds of it and not to take any crap!
2007-06-11 11:28:41 · answer #3 · answered by West Aussie Chick 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think staying up late for his birthday with friends is fine. I do think for an 11 yr old there should be some set bedtime for regular weekends like 11 or so. Theres really no need for him to be up after that. Mainly because when you are sleeping you cant watch what he is watching on tv or moniter what he is looking at online.
2007-06-11 11:22:26 · answer #4 · answered by J&A 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honestly sounds like she needs to put her foot down to her hubby, especially since thats not his kid. For an 11 yr old b-day party to let them sta up- that is totally standard stuff, I didthis all the time growing up and i turned out fine. What she needs to worry about is the moral and ethical guidlines she is teaching her son.... Not sure how spoiled he is, she just needs to do her best, and raise him with love.
2007-06-11 11:23:01 · answer #5 · answered by 4Real 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no not to the parenting classes. i agree with both. it is ok to say up late on the weekends when there is no school, but 5 am is way to late. more like midnight for that age
2007-06-11 11:22:50 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋