For a lot of good reasons my mom hates my husband. My husband talks bad about my mother in front of me and I think it's wrong and that he should keep his feelings towards himself am I right?
2007-06-11 03:56:40 · 18 answers · asked by Mom of 4 boys and twins 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
You need to sit your husband down and tell him that you love him and you love your mother. If he has a shred of caring and love for you he will henceforth refrain from talking bad about your mother. If he cannot do that for you, he doesn't love you too much. Your mother probably hurts inside that you don't have a loving husband who is kind and caring because she loves you so much and wants the best kind of life for you. However, she shouldn't talk bad about your husband to you. He was your choice to marry (and your choice if you ever leave him). Tell her the same thing you are telling your man. Tell her it hurts you when she bad-mouths your husband and to please stop.
2007-06-11 04:03:55 · answer #1 · answered by Wiser1 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are caught in the middle here, aren't you!!!! You may have to move farther from family, your mom, so she is not so involved in your marriage. Your husband and mom could be jealous of each other. But, I noticed you said your mom hates your husband for alot of good reasons. I don't know what those reasons are. Are you supporting him, does he hit you, verbally abuse you, drink alot? These are cases where your mom has a legitimate reason to not like your husband. You really didn't give any idea for me to base an answer on, because you didn't tell anything about why your mom and husband don't get along. she could be nosey and but into your business. I don't know. Tell more details.
2007-06-11 04:08:40 · answer #2 · answered by The pink panther 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
How long have you been married? That is pretty much the normal way it works. Now, for your sake, he should learn to smile through it and make nice for you. I have been married seven years, I love my wife, I still dread every Holiday get together or Sunday dinner that I have to attend at her parents. I go though because it means a lot to my wife and on the flip side I know my family drives her nuts... you can choose your spouse, the family comes with them whether you want them too or not. This is a dance and one that your husband need to learn the steps too.
2016-05-17 08:13:01 · answer #3 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are right to not want to hear anyone talking bad about someone that you love. If I were you I would sit them both down and point out that it is okay for them to not like each other. However, it is not okay for you to have to hear about it. Explain to them that if they truly love you they will not put you in the middle of their mess.
(By the way I am guessing your mom has reason to not like your hubby because you let her know private things- often times people only know what you tell them... maybe if you and your husband gets into a fight or altercation, you shouldnt run and tell your mom- that would be putting her in the middle and inviting the drama!)
2007-06-11 04:16:27 · answer #4 · answered by Enchanted One 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
First of all, this man has no right to disrespect your mother in front of you. That just isn't right. You need to tell him that it makes you uncomfortable for him to disrespect your mother in front of you. If he really has something worth complaining about then he should be a real man and have a face to face conversation with your mother. They should have to try to work out their differences. If that doesn't happen, then I only see things getting worse for you. It will only be a matter of time before he starts disrespecting you as well. If your mother is doing something to be the cause of these problems, then you need to have a face to face conversation with her. Tell her to straighten up, or else you will not be a part of her life. Regardless of whose fault this situation is, it needs to be taken care of. You should not have to pick between two people that you really care about and love. And if these two both really cared about you, then they wouldn't put you in the position of picking. Hopefully you do not have kids in this situation. Good luck with whatever you decide to do. Take care.
2007-06-11 04:37:05 · answer #5 · answered by cmg1977 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry, maybe you should try not and share so much of your busines with your mother. And she should respect your husband more. See if you and he has a problem....sooner of later it will be resloved and you will move on. However, if you have told your mother (she is still in the state of mommy's little girl) she will take a bit more time to get over it...or still play it back in her head later...even when you have forgiven him.... so, just pray about their relationship together and you try and keep the peace.
2007-06-11 04:04:38 · answer #6 · answered by Queen 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You married him, not your mother, so you should be happy and she should mind her own business. A mother should be happy for her child if he\she finds a partner who loves them, not interfere and ruin the relationship. Tell him to talk to you as much as he wants, cuase he is your husband and he wants to talk about his feelings and you should be supporting him. Instead of telling him to stop his nonsense, listen to what his opinion is and then ask him nicely not to say ugly things, but to act mature. Then you go to your mom and tell her to stop her nonsense and start liking him because you are married and that's forever(in the good old days).
2007-06-11 04:04:20 · answer #7 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
yes he should keep his feelings towards himself , but at the same time if you are married to him and if you have to put up with it than the best thing to do is to try and better the situation. sit both of them down and talk to them...show them that you notice the situation and how it might be effecting you.
as for your husband... tell him that is bothers you and what ever he has to say to it...just say..." im sorry you feel that way but shes still my mother weather you like it or not and you should respect that she is my mother"
or try a family councilor
2007-06-11 05:06:26 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, but at the same time if your mother hates your husband for all the right reasons, why are you with him. You should be more worried about why you are in this marriage then anyone elses feeliings.
2007-06-11 07:06:29 · answer #9 · answered by beliz 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
u know what, u should watch some of those korean drama. yeah , wife's mom and husband, the argument happens all the time. maybe your husband should watch those drama and learn how to be a good husband. hope this helps
2007-06-11 04:03:42 · answer #10 · answered by dat_nguyen160 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋