My best friend got engaged about 7 months ago. He has been with the girl for about 3-4 years. She he isn't that bright compared to him (she has been working at Taco Bell/waitressing and he is a Chemical Engineer). She also does not feel comfortable around his friends. Anyways - his mother passed away from cancer a year ago and it has been hard on him. Just a few months ago the girlfriend wanted to leave him and I think she cheated on him as well. He is somewhat of an obsessive compulsive and wouldn't let her leave him so I kinda guess they are still going through with the wedding. But how do I convice him that he can't do it - especially if she has cheated on him and wants to leave him. He may be doing himself more harm than good and may take all his money if they get divorced someday. He has always had trouble being single.
HELP!
2007-06-11 03:43:53 · 7 answers · asked by Becker 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Bottom line. This woman is putting out and has him by the balls. I've been there and know. When it ends he will look like a sap. Hopefully before he 'weds' her he will get enlightened.
He is not thinking about what is 'between her ears'.
Sexual desire is a powerful thing and can make even a genius turn stupid.
It might help to ask him questions when you guys are together. Ask him questions that make it obviouse this is a dead end for him. Yes, she is capable of being a digger. That is for certain. She is into heself only.
Next step. Tell him directly your doubts. May damage your friendship but may work too.
2007-06-11 03:51:56 · answer #1 · answered by Mike R 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand your concern for your friend but he will do as he wishes no matter what you say to him..but he may hear you and down the road it will sink in and he will see it for himself. More then likely if she has strayed, she wont go thru w/the wedding or will stray again. As you had said..he is having a hard time w/losing his mother so he is clinging onto her. Hopefully for his sake he will figure this out and let her go and find someone more suiting for him. Do you have anyone in mind? Just go out in a group and let him see whats out there and what he could be missing and it might make him re-evaluate his relationship and atleast put the wedding on hold.
2007-06-11 03:56:49 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately there is nothing you can do to MAKE him stop the wedding....all you can do is be a friend and be honest with him without being overly critical of her....it sounds like that since the loss of his mother that he has become co-dependent on her...because whether she's good to him or not, she's been the constant in his life! Just have a heart to heart with him and ask him to consider that her heart is not into it if she was wanting to leave him....marriage is suppose to be for better or worse...and when times got bad for him, she was wanting to bail. But bottom line, the decision is his, not yours....just be supportive either way!
2007-06-11 03:53:06 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Damn.. thts sad.. Make it known to your friend tht by marrying someone who doesnt likes him is just going to make him so upset in future. She has cheated on him even before gettin married. i am sure she will do it when she is married. And once getting married i think every guys should feel that their wife is like their soul mate, who are meant for them only. And is he ever finds out she cheate don him after marriage. It is going to make him so upset, which will make him do things which might spoil his life. More like a chain reaction.. I am sure he can find better girls out there. And this girl whom he likes should be dumped right away.. Let her spoil her life since she cheated on him. Dude you got a chance to make a difference in ur friends life.. i really hope you will be able to do it.. All the best. Lastly why go for a girl who doesnt respect you? Probably she will make you angry all the time and **** you off when you guys are living together.. Do not marry her just to be satisfied, but rather be upset by not marrying her and be happy forever and not spoil his life by being with her
2007-06-11 03:53:42 · answer #4 · answered by Tired 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You might want to mention a prenup to your friend. Tell him it's to protect himself. Really talk to him, be there for him. He may not listen and go through with the wedding, but at least you know that you told him EVERYTHING. And telling him just might put some questions into his head.
2007-06-11 03:51:52 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I hate to say this, but I don't know if there is any way you can convince your friend that marrying this woman is a bad idea. After all, when it comes to love and lust, people will do whatever it is that they want to do. That being said, though, I really think that your friend could use a good therapist!
2007-06-11 03:49:08 · answer #6 · answered by tangerine 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ok of course he may not want to let her leave him. he just lost his mother. maybe he feels like he don't really have anyone else he can really love. but if she maybe has cheated on him then you try to convince hey look man it's not right for u to be with her. that's not a relationship if there is cheating going on. look man i really care about you and everything your my best friend. i don't like seeing you hurt. just try to have a nice down to earth conversation with him. maybe he will realize that she's not right.
2007-06-11 03:49:45 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋