What do you think of this office girl's attitude towards children with Down's Syndrome and Autism?

Question

My co-worker who thinks she's such hot stuff started going on one day about wanting to have a baby and being ok with the child's gender as long as it was healthy. Then she went on to say-outload infront of everyone in the office-that she could not handle a disabled child! "I COULD NOT HANDLE THAT!," she said really loudly for everyone to hear. She went on to talk about kids with autism and down's syndrome and made them sound like diseases. She talked about the day she went to visit a boss who had a 6 year old girl with Down's Syndrome and how the little girl started picking her nose at the table.

It sounded more like she was talking about a monkey than a little girl with Down's Syndrome.

-they're could have people in the office with kids that have Down's Syndrome or Autism

-please tell me not all office people see these children as sub humans

I know people with kids with Down's Syndrome and Autism who would have been hurt by these comments.

Answer 1

A six-year-old picked her nose? The horror.

Tell her if she thinks her kid is going to be perfect, she's in for a big surprise. There are all kinds of horrible things that can happen to kids, disabilities or otherwise. If she can't stick with her child no matter what happens, she shouldn't have children at all.

This reminds me of a story. My daughter has Down syndrome, her cousin of the same age doesn't. One night both families went out to dinner. The cousin was walking but my girl wasn't yet, and it was depressing. Then we got to the restaurant and my girl was a perfect angel who calmly at everything, the cousin screamed and squirmed and only wanted candy. I wasn't depressed any more.

Answer 2

She sounds rather ignorant and judgmental. My guess would be that she's uncomfortable around anyone different from her and the only way she knows how to express this is by acting superior.

Most people, office workers or otherwise, don't view special needs children that way. Unfortunately, some people - any profession -- do. The really sad part is the they are missing out on a blessing.

I've known several kids with Down Syndrome and almost without exception, they are the sweetest, funniest, most charming children I've been around.

Parents of special needs kids are blessed and are very special. I don't think your co-worker has to worry about that.

Answer 3

Well she's not ready to have a baby then. You can not control whether your baby has Downs or Autism. I mean she could have testing done for Downs and abort if she wanted, but Autism isn't diagnosed until around 2 or 3, so she's be stuck there. Either way, most people don't think they could handle a child with special need until they are put in that position.

This girl sounds very immature because even if she felt this way, she should have the common sense to know someone with a speciall needs child could be listening, and that maybe she should keep her thoughts to her self.

Answer 4

Unfortunately there are quite a few people in this world who see it that way and they will not change...it is tragic. this woman sounds very self-centered from all that you have said...it is too bad she does not have an open mind, because she is missing out on some very special people.
My husband told me something yesterday, which kind of shocked me....he said he used to pick on kids with DS when he was in school. Today, some 30 or so years later he is the very proud daddy to a little boy with down syndrome! Our son has taught many about acceptance and understanding, but most importantly to his own father. my DH would go to the ends of the earth to protect his son and any other child with a disability.

Answer 5

This woman is ignorant. She does not know what she's talking about. I hear women say that a lot. People want a healthy baby. There's nothing wrong with that. Maybe she couldn't handle a baby with down's. She must have a reason for this fear. Is she older? Maybe somebody in her family has this. My brother has Down's and I'm still glad my babies were healthy. I don't see why that makes me bad. It doesn't. Everybody wishes for a happy baby. I've never heard anyone say, Please let my baby be sick. She may not be voicing her oppinion in the right way but she has every right to want a healthy baby. If she doesn't get one, then she's in quite a bit of trouble isn't she? And at this point she doesn't know what she can handle if she hasn't had kids yet anyway.

Answer 6

That's just one persons opinion and although to me it sounds really narrow minded and ignorant. Its just what she believes she can handle. i don't think any one can know how they would react until they find themselves in that situation. it would be very easy for me to say i would b grand and able to cope. but how do i know for sure? i suppose it takes something like having a child with downs syndrome or autism to know what u have to go through. It isn't going to be a easy life. In a way even though she may not have worded it the best way it is harder to say something that goes against the grain than to just agree with every one else. at least she was honest. Caring for a child with down syndrome is a life long and very hard job and also u have to worry who will look after them when u die?

Answer 7

I'm cognitively and developmentally disabled, and even my own family members have got a really nasty attitude towards me - not just the people back in Britain! As you can imagine, i hate being around other people, and i hate being in any sort of environment as well because i just feel really unsafe and unsettled just being around other human beings! It's okay for all those normally functioning people without any brain disease or brain problem to show hatred towards the brain disabled and see us cognitively and developmentally disabled "retards" as a complete waste of space and a burden, but no one seems to understand or even care about how frustrating it is and how much of a real unusual constant struggle life is for autistics, for example; and no one even bothers to at least try to imagine or understand how much suffering these brain disabled people are going through. It's easy for all these neurotypicals to tell us autistics to stop dwelling on our condition, but how would they feel if they were victims of some devastating genetic brain disease which they were made to battle throughout life? So as an autistic, you can't blame me for feeling really depressed, miserable, and bitter about life because i feel that life has been very cruel to me and to others in my situation! No human being on Earth should even be allowed to have something like autism or any other neurological brain disorder in the first place, because it's not very fair on them or their families. But at the same time, that doesn't mean that autistics and other brain disabled people should be treated like dirt by normal people or treated differently in the way human beings would expect to be treated.

Answer 8

She better hope and pray that she doesn't have children. It seems that God will hand us exactly what we don't want and she is really asking for it. It is difficult with people in the world who are like her. Ignorance is running wild and there is nothing we can do but educate and then the person has to be willing to learn. Since I work with people with developmental disabilities at a facility I can't say that all office people are like that because we don't have that here but as I mentioned earlier there is a growing ignorance that can't be prevented.

Answer 9

You don't have to have a disability to pick your nose.My son is 7 and he still does it constantly,yuck.Sounds to me like she needs some sensitivity training and that she maybe needs to grow up a little too.I have a little sister who's disabled and even though she doesn't comprehend things like we do here,it would still upset me and the rest of our family to hear some body talk about her like your co-worker was doing.Lets hope she never has a special needs child,not because it would be hard on her,but because her child would probably not get the care and attention that it deserves and needs.

Answer 10

Sounds like yet another clueless bigot. And yes, they're all too common.

I sincerely hope that any kids she has aren't disabled, just because she'd really screw them up. I don't want to inflict her on any autistic kids, or kids with Down's Syndrome, as she sounds like she might end up abusive in that case.

As an autistic, I'm *really* glad my parents weren't anything like this woman.