Advice about Depression?

Question

Ok but I think my ex is really depressed, first her parents and her do not get along then her favorite aunt is getting deported and now her best friend had to go back to peru cause her student visa ran out and she doesnt think she will ever see her again. Now all she does is hang out with the wrong crowd and she says she has no idea what she is doing in life. Its hard for me cause im the best influence on her life but she just acts so strange now and im scared she might like Od on something she is only 19 so i know thats alot to deal with at young age. Should I be aggresive and step in to help her to get her life on track or should i just let her come to her senses by herself???

Its hard cause I heard depression effects judgment and makes u not want to hang with people ur close to and i think thats why me and her dont talk as much and stuff anymore.

Answer 1

Your concern is really touching. The important thing is to make her realize that you are still there as a friend for her. Don't become all preachy with her with speaches like, 'I feel really concerned with your drug use' right now. I suffer from depression and other disorders and it makes me really uncomfortable when my family or friends ever said things like that. Any type of statement they made like they knew something was wrong with me made me push them away more.

Best thing would be to get her involved with other things without putting down her more recent choices. Think about what she used to love doing or places she loved going, and then help her reconnect with that.

Another thing that really helped me was to get involved with something bigger than myself. I started volunteering some time to a local food shelf. Seeing what problems other people were overcoming helped put things in perspective for me and gave me a little more strength to keep going.

Answer 2

Good for you for wanting to help your ex. She needs someone to talk to, who doesn't tell her what to do, who just listens, like a counselor or a priest/minister. Most
girls do not get along with their parents as teens, so that is normal, but difficult. The rest is hard, and not so normal/
ordinary. Just be her friend for now; no personal agenda. And it might not be easy for you; guys like to "fix" things,
and you really can't fix the aunt being deported or the best friend's visa running out. You can keep her from bad company by providing an alternative--you. Good Luck!

Answer 3

letting this run its course is the wrong thing to do. you should definatly step up. if she doesnt listen to you keep trying. do whatever it takes. Alot of teens die every year, every minute, for OD and you dont want to see that happen to a friend. tell her to see a counselor. tell her to live above the influence and tell her everybody hits road bumps but youll eventually get over them. I hate to say this but i went throught a stage like this before and i know that it is tough but it is nothing compared to all the good things in life like marrage, family, friends, and so much more! she should not waste her life like this and you should not waste your time watching.

hope i helped

xox byee

Answer 4

See depression treatments at http://www.ezy-build.net.nz/~shaneris on page 2, and print/note relevant parts, and give to her, saying you are concerned for her welfare, are worried about that the people she has been associating recently are no good for her, and that you will be there for her, if she needs help.

Answer 5

she is your ex, right? Time to let go and let her get on with her own life. She is young and that is alot of have happen in a short space of time, but she is young and they tend to be a bit more resilient. But as she is your ex, it isn't your problem and in fact shouldn't be your problem, she has to learn to solve her own problems.

Answer 6

Ex can still be friend!!! Be a friend to her. Listen to her and give your opinion if you are asked to do so. She will get over it.