Communication frustration?

Question

Eventhough I say exactly what I mean, and I am very clear with my message, I still come across so many people who still don't understand what I'm saying. I sometimes have to give detailed directions on how to complete a task, and I find that many people are just not good at follwing directions, even when it is to their own benefit to do so. Does anyone have this problem communicating with people?

Answer 1

I have the same problem at times, but have found that the "communication breakdown" often isn't on my part - it's because we (Americans) aren't good LISTENERS! When good information falls on deaf or dumb ears, the result is the same as if the communication itself wasn't up to par. Once we become better, more active listeners, a lot of our communication fumbles will be remedied. (Oh, and a side note - the fact that our schools barely teach our children how to have a decent grasp of vocabulary doesn't help!)

Answer 2

To be able or not? That’s the question!

A mere “yes” would answer your question; however, I’d like to share with you what I have learned with this same problem we share.

Whenever you communicate with someone, although, the message may be clear to you there are a series of filters that may not allow the listener "grab" what you're trying to communicate. The problem is that the listener isn't able to "hear or interpret" the message until this goes through a process of filters: word associations, tones, believes, experiences, speaker’s body language, speech, and feelings. All these elements may alter the message completely, making the listener interpret something completely different from the one intended by the speaker. This is why two people who listen to the same message would hear two completely different things depending on their filters. This is why speaking is a skill as well as listening. Some of us may have one more developed than the other; while others may have both developed or undeveloped.

For instance: The other day while I was on the phone with my brother, I asked him if he had visited my sister. My sister had been sick all week unable to go to work. I had visited her the day before my conversation with my brother. To my surprise my brother responded irritated: "Do you think I am home all day doing nothing?”

Aware that he’d misinterpreted my question, I calmly (this is not the first time it's happened to me) asked him if he'd heard what I asked him because his answer should have been a "yes" or "no". Embarrassed, he asked me to repeat the question, and so I asked him again.

He said that my question implied that he had extra time, so I reminded him that my nowhere was I implying anything other than what I asked. So I told him that he’s the one interpreting something that I’ve not communicated-meaning that it came from him, not me.

Understanding the filters we all use helped me tremendously in communicating better with others because it made me realized that we don’t all have the same abilities. Also, while directness may be welcome by some, it may also be off putting for others. Therefore, I learned through my communication frustrations not to expect or grow impatient when someone simply doesn’t communicate the way I do.

Thus have patience, and challenge yourself to be ABLE to understand that others simply don’t communicate the same way you do. I did, and this way is serving me much better.

Will I be able? Now that should be your question!

Answer 3

Wait a minute. in case you're having difficulty conversing with human beings frequently.....possibly its no longer them, yet you. Make a recording of you speaking on your known way and notice in case you are able to hit upon a topic. Have a particular pal hear to you giving instructions and notice what they think of. i comprehend a guy or woman who's particularly clever yet by potential of the time he gets with the aid of telling you some thing you would be so puzzled which you do no longer probable comprehend what his subject-loose element replaced into. it is because of the fact he jumps off the main difficulty alongside the way. you are going to be throwing in all styles of un-necessary issues which you're perplexing them. you won't be giving sufficient information. Do you circulate from start up right now to the point or do you throw in all styles of "part trails" alongside the way? solid success. Pops

Answer 4

I forget the actual percentage, but people only remember a small amount of the total information they are given if it's the first time they're hearing it.

If you're the one with the knowledge to pass on, it can be frustrating to have to keep repeating yourself, but that's just the way the mind works.

Answer 5

There are three types of learners:
Visual Learners learn through seeing
Auditory Learners learn through listening
Tactile/Kinesthetic Learners learn through moving, doing, touching
The people who don't understand what you are saying are not Auditory Learners. To reach the Visual Learners it is best to use visual displays and ask them to take notes. To communicate to the Tactile Learners try to use a hands on approach.
If you want to communicate more effectively, you will need to use a variety of methods.

Answer 6

i have the exact same problem. i just decided that its not my fault for wording the sentence wrong, nor is it the listeners' fault for hearing it wrong. i think that "americanized" english is too finite. as opposed to characters in other languages that are kind of vague. this is probably because america was the last major country established, but maybe thats just me

Answer 7

Welcome to the world.

This is one of the oldest problems in society.

Answer 8

huh?