potty training problems...with 3 little ones..?

Question

I have 3 babies a son who just turned 3 and twin girls who also just turned 2. I have tried a little potty seat but they want to play with/in it more than sit on it and I have tried getting them on the big potty. It all only worked for a couple of days and then they just lost interest in it and they havent done it since and wont do it even when I make them sit on their potty for 15 min or so. They wait untill the pull up is on and then do it. I have tried treats and praise but they only really go on the potty every so often but wont do it on a regular basis. Can anyone "who knows what it is like and succeded let me know what you did?"

Answer 1

Chill out. They'll pick up at daycare sooner or later. Peer pressure can be good at times.

Answer 2

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Answer 3

Does your little one inform you by way of words, facial expressions or posture when he or she wants to go?
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Answer 4

The two girls are probably still too young, and possibly so is your son. The fact that they show no interest in the big potty or small is usually a pretty clear indicator. I would ask if they show any awareness of when they are wet or in a soiled diaper. The simple truth is you can't force potty training...not without running the risk of making it into an issue and that can have some unpleasant results! We tend to push our kids to potty train at the youngest age possible, when the truth is developmentally, the earliest age to consider it is around 2 and a half, with between 3 and 4 closer to the norm ( This is not to say there aren't plenty of kids who have managed to be potty trained younger, and in many cases had to be to attend daycare). Boys especially tend to have a tougher time and it is not unusal for a boy to be past four before he is ready.

If you must get them potty trained, the first thing to do is not to push. Next, stay cool. It sounds like you have tried some good ideas, but I wonder how long you tried it before trying something else. Whichever method seemed to generate the most interest, bring it back. Rewards are often the best way to go, but your child needs to earn the reward over a period of time or it is too easy. First, all diaper changes should be done in the bathroom. This will help the kids to "get" that the bathroom is where you go for pee and poop. Put a basket of small toys and books in the bathroom for the kids to look at while you change them. These items are only for the bathroom and can't be taken anyplace else. When you go in to change them, have the child sit on the potty seat, pants up, while you get things out and again while you put back the wipes, do trash, etc. While they are sitting on the potty, make comments about what a nice job they are doing and how proud of them you are. If they refuse, do not insist, Simply say ok and then next time ask again. While they sit on the potty, they can read or play with a toy from the basket. Now, once the child willingly sits on the potty without much prompting from you, you move to the next step. When you go in to change diapers, you remove the old diaper and have the child sit on the potty. Hand them a book, talk with them, let them play. Praise them for this, telling them how proud you are. After a few minutes, have them put on the pull up, and go on their way. If that goes well, you can move on to the next step. Using a kitchen timer, set it at intervals (every 45 minutes or so) and when it goes off, announce it is potty time. Encourage the child to sit on the potty and read, play, talk for at least five minutes. If something happens, you should clap, dance and praise the child immensely. If nothing happens, praise them for trying and remind them that we will tray again next time the timer goes off. If they wet the pullups in between, simply go into the bathroom, have them sit on the potty as before and change the pull up (the child should handle changing the pull up as much as possible...if they can't handle the pulling up and down, then you may need to wait another six months to train so they can become more co-ordinated). Keep this up...stay calm..no yelling over accidents or punishments if they happen. You can post a chart in the bathroom where each child gets a sticker when they do whatever step they are on succesfully. Come up with a list of rewards they can earn after getting so many stars. As they progress, adjust rewards and goals accordingly. Praise will be the biggest help...so don't be afraid to use it. When my daughter finally used the potty for the first time, we had a potty party (cake and some leftover birthday hats and noisemakers) to celebrate. The process is going to take time. If at any point a child refuses to sit on the potty or makes it clear they have no desire to even try, backoff and wait another few months. My daughter took her potty seat and put it in the closet, under a blanket at one point...I got the message! I backed off and six months later, she trained herself in a week. It may seem like it is taking forever or your child is the only one in diapers, but trust me...you are not alone and your kids won't go to Kindergarden in pull ups.

Answer 5

1] you can't train them before they are ready - they might not be
2] how many potties do you have?
3] train the older one first, if he is ready.
Put him on the potty right after breakfast, when he is likely to go.
Give him a star every time he pees, and let him put it on the calender, or himself.
If he poops, give him a special sticker.
He can show Daddy etc. every day how well he is doing.
4] put him on potty again about 2 hours later, and after each meal/drink/snack.
5] after he is trained, then do the girls

Answer 6

do the older one first and make it a time that you two have without the twins...and when and if he is successful a reward in imminent...no gain no potty...and as for any sort of force that has to be out of the question...no when the twins are napping then you and he can go in and read....and he could have a lolli then to take the mind off the problem...also being present to his potty time would help...and sons do well if when he gets intothe tub you know he has to go them and just give him a cup they love peeing in a cup...soon the twins will see that big brother is getting special treatment when he has success and they will want to have it too....so do one at a time...less frustrating that way...

Answer 7

Maybe if they have 'friends' that are potty trained and they see them using the potty it'd help. My nephew was 3 1/2 before he was potty-trained...a little old maybe, but no accidents! Don't worry about it too much-I know it'd get old changing all those diapers, but if you let them wait til they want to it'll go a lot easier.

Answer 8

there is no such thing as an age too young, potty training should be started when they are really young, they need to get used to the potty, when i was small, my dad was very stern about potty usage, its not a game its dicipline , my mum used to teach me, like when i feel i was gonna go wee-wee, i should tell her, and she would led my hand and bring me to the green potty, according to my bother she did it till i was so used to it i didnt tell her anymore i would go potty my self, same went with my bro, my lilttle brother and my lil sister, you must be strict, no you shoulnt use treats cuz they would just go potty even a fake potty just for the treats,

Answer 9

I was telling my husband the other day that I had no idea how many parents these days were struggling to find answers to toddler things that were just kind of common knowledge when we were raising kids. Now I do. Makes me want to write a how to book, lol. Anyways, I am gonna cheat here and re-use a previous answer of mine regarding potty training and other assorted toddler issues, because I think you have fallen into the same trap of making potty a power struggle as that asker had.First, I want to say two things to you though. 1.) In a power struggle with a toddler you might just as well surrender because they don't know the meaning of surrender and you are doomed!! 2.) Fifteen minutes on the potty makes it a punishment and doesn't help a bit as you have seen. Five minutes maximum!
So, hope this helps:
The answer here may seem obvious but I have noticed that for many young parents it is not, so here I go on my soap box again!!! One word. Consistency. Being consistent in your parenting approach is the single most effective tool you have, and it is the only approach which works! A consistent parent gives the SAME recation to a certain behavior (such as breaking toys) each and EVERY time it occurs. If you are tired, on the phone, watching TV, whatever, it does NOT matter. If you want a well behaved child then YOU don't get excuses for not being consistent. For example, you are on the phone and your 3 yr old siezes the moment to grab the other's toy and break it. What do you do? Yell at him? Threaten him with what will occur when you are done talking??? Three year olds could just care LESS about the future! No, to be consistent you say into the phone" I have to go now" or "can you please wait a sec" put the phone down, walk over to where 3 yr old is, remove toy, place child in timeout, etc. In short, you must be willing to deal with bad behavior when it is occuring, not when it is convenient. Cuz, oh boy, do your kids just know when it isn't convenient!! Kids, especially stronger-willed ones who always need to try and define their independence 24 hours a day, lol, desperately need YOU to provide the controls and stability that they cannot, because they ARE kids. That is your job. I would never say that a parent is responsible for every act a teenager makes, but to a very large degree, you ARE responsible for the actions of your toddler. Toddlers are not thinking, reasoning, calculating little miniature adults setting out to drive you nuts ... they are babies who are learning their world, testing limits to see what is allowed and not, over and over again. They are obstinate. They resist you. It's how they grow and develop. It is called LEARNING. You are the guide. You wouldn't take a bunch of people on a trip, acting as guide, and walk them off a cliff would you? Well, you are your children's guide in life. Where you LEAD (and if you are NOT consistent, it's into "crazy" behavior like fighting brother, breaking toys, refusing to do what you want, ie: potty in the potty) they WILL follow. By sometimes not responding to a negative behavior, or just yelling at them, and not acting you have actually TAUGHT your child that he can get away with stuff often enough that he is willing to risk it because as far as he knows, he may get away with it this time!! Now, be clear here, he doesn't consciously sit there and think all that, but that is the process deep in his little learning center, lol.

So, bottom line, parenting is the hardest work you will ever do if you try to do it well! You are on call 24-7, tired, sick, busy, doesn't matter, still YOUR job. Do it well and you and your child will be happy more often than not. Consistent consequences are key. Hey, you always smile when you tell him I love you, right? So, he learned being told I love you is a good thing. Again, the key is ALWAYS.

As for potty training specifically, busy, strong-willed kids, in my experience, need to be at least 3 and in a cooperative state of mind when the training starts. So, wait a few more weeks (to get fighting you over it off his mind) then decide you are going to make his potty training number one parent job for the next week or two. Put him on the pot on a frequent schedule. Clean his "mistakes" up without comment. Compliment his performance when it's in the pot by letting HIM roll off a little paper, flush it, etc. Kids love this stuff! Lol, one of my grandkids used to wave and say bye-bye poo-poo every time he flushed his poop! But, letting him is why he cooperated and did it!! See what I mean? Whether you have him sinking cheerios or fruit loops, or train him sitting down, the point is it won't work until it becomes easier for him to do what you want then to fight you. Eventually, if you sit him on the pot for 5 minutes every hour for a couple days, he will use the pot enough that he will get the idea that, hey, this is much better and easier than getting my diaper changed all the time, and quicker too!!!

Parents magazine has some terrific contributing writers that often give excellent advice for parents stressed out by kids being kids. http://www.parents.com/parents/magazine/...

Lastly, when your kids is driving you bonkers and you just know your last nerve is shot, try telling yourself, "OMG!!! he is being such a three year old!" lol, this brings it back into focus, because, well, he is NOT crazy, he is just THREE.

Answer 10

Sometimes they just aren't ready. My DD was 32 mos my DS was 39 mos!!

Check online for potty charts & signs they're ready. Having those signs is most importat IMO.